well today makes 2 weeks sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2003
Location: ct
Posts: 55
well today makes 2 weeks sober
And i must say if feel better than i have in quite some time.I can think clearly,have focus and motivation,getting back into my instrument again,and once more am open to my spiritual side.Life without alcohol is truly living,compared to the mearly existing condition while using,i don't want to go back into the shadows again.God give me strength.
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: A van...down by the river!
Posts: 108
Congrats!
KindaBlue,
I know how you feel! During my first 2 weeks of sobriety I felt like I was waking up after being in a coma for 6 years! Let us pray for the STRENGTH to never go back to the hell we once lived...and the INTELLIGENCE to remember that that's EXACTLY what it was.
Keep up the good work!
PianoGirl
I know how you feel! During my first 2 weeks of sobriety I felt like I was waking up after being in a coma for 6 years! Let us pray for the STRENGTH to never go back to the hell we once lived...and the INTELLIGENCE to remember that that's EXACTLY what it was.
Keep up the good work!
PianoGirl
I like cake
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 34
Keep coming back!
Originally posted by PianoGirl
I know how you feel! During my first 2 weeks of sobriety I felt like I was waking up after being in a coma for 6 years! Let us pray for the STRENGTH to never go back to the hell we once lived...and the INTELLIGENCE to remember that that's EXACTLY what it was.
I know how you feel! During my first 2 weeks of sobriety I felt like I was waking up after being in a coma for 6 years! Let us pray for the STRENGTH to never go back to the hell we once lived...and the INTELLIGENCE to remember that that's EXACTLY what it was.
Many congratulations on your 2 weeks, Kindablue. The good news is it only gets better, too.
I'm continually amazed by this sobriety-recovery lark... like, I'm suddenly able to DEAL with life without going into manic drama queen mode at the slightest opportunity. Serenity has a lot to answer for!
What I DO have to make myself remember, every day, lest I forget and get complacent, is exactly how bad it all DID get. How my life was utterly unmanageable and almost over, the months and months of agony, the mania, the fact that things sunk so low, to a place I never thought I'd get, a place that, to go back to, would be intolerable and I think my life WOULD be very quickly over, for good and all, if I did.
Because life today is so very different, so calm and happy and - everything I never imagined, it's easy to let the madness fade into a bad but distant memory. I cannot afford to let that happen. Before long, I'd remember all the nice times when drinking, when it was manageable, when I COULD enjoy a drink with friends, when I COULD relax with some wine, when it eased my mind and body and when it WORKED. If I dwell on the positives, of which there were many for a long time, I risk forgetting the negatives, which ended up destroying the positives and taking over my life. The positives are gone, they ARE just memories and I will never again be able to experience them. My body and mind are hypersensitive and intolerant to alcohol now.
I must make myself remember the badness that was and would be again should I pick up a drink. But, in remembering the hell, I appreciate my life today so much more. It's so bright and peaceful and joyous... free from the tyranny of alcohol. Life isn't perfect but compared to how it was, it's pretty damned close! I was talking to another friend in recovery yesterday.... we discussed a friend of mine who's also in recovery but who has a negative attitude... saying a lot of the time: 'It's so hard, it's not easy, it's la la la la la...' Yes, OK, my other friend and I agreed, that's true. But how hard is it when you look back to how it WAS? The deceit, the lies, the sneaking around, the blackouts, the constant death-warmed-over feeling, the fear of everything, the paranoia, the withdrawals when one tried to do the right thing but which inevitably forced one back to the substance that could bring relief, the sense that ones mind is taken over by this obsession to get drink, drink the drink, hide drink, recover from drink... that's all life was.... one long, constant, cycle of getting, drinking, recovering... To me, all that is a world away now. Like all the hell happened to a different person. That the Nic of today is reborn.
Today is so very different. I'll fight to keep my recovery. It's a precious gift that I appreciate more than anything I ever had.
Take care, Kindablue and keep coming back. It really does work if you work it!
Nic
x
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2003
Location: ct
Posts: 55
Thanx for all the positive feedback guys,it's been about 2 years since i've gone this long without a drink.i've reconciled with my girlfriend,she reluctantly took me back, not wanting more of the same.But i promised her i wouldn't drink and have stuck by my promise.she is totally amazed at the difference,so much so she has to ask me time again..are you the same person?who is this guy anyway?lol.she is completely thrilled by the difference,she can see a whole other me,one that she has never met,the real me.It is like waking up after being in a coma,as someone mentioned.Out of the darkness and into the light,thank god not too late.
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