IMHomerSimpson

Im still kickin and screamin,back to the old ways.Many were right here refusing to beleive I was gonna turn my life around.Basically,Im just as close to hopeless as one could get.Dont pity me,dont sugar-coat me,dont defend me.I am NOT sure Ill ever quit!!
So,when I do come here just accept me for what I am,I wanna come and say hello so many days but since I am NOT sober I dont want to start controversial threads like has been done before.Miss ya freakin sober people LOL. Just remember if the thought EVER crosses your mind about picking up,think of me,unhappy BECAUSE of that drink.your pal,Patrick

Phillips

Hello mate. Hello back to you.

- Phillips

Astro

OK, I know I won't pity you. Sounds like you've got the proverbial head full of AA, belly full of beer. You know how good sobriety looks and feels, it's up to you whether to embrace it or not.

But we don't shoot our wounded. Just keep coming back, OK?

IMHomerSimpson

astro,you seem to know where im at in life,thanks for not shootin me down lol,im just not ready,hope ya guys understand.
Im fitting in and pretending to be normal,well a normal drinker that is.I do have a "label" to many but can still get away with it.Its very confusing.

CarolD

Hi Patrick..
No...I will not pity or cajole
or try to convince you.

Keep as safe as possible..Hugs

parentrecovers

i've been wondering about you...k

Rowan

I been wonderin 'bout you too, Homeboy. Stay safe. xoxox

laurie6781

Hi Patrick.

You know me better than that, you will get sober when you are ready. No I will not pity you, nor will I cajole you.

However, you do have my phone number and when you are ready, you will call and we will talk.

Until then I will continue to ask HP to watch over you.

Love and hugs,

stone

Hi Patrick-no judgements here bud! If it was easy there wouldnt be people dying from it everyday. Good to see you.

GrouchoTheCat

Welcome back,

Just keep coming.

splendra

((((Homie)))

Sending you a stiff kick in the pants...

scaredykat

Hi homer,

I know exactly how you feel. I'm still struggling with my drinking too.That's why I'm scaredykat. I feel funny writing on here too sometimes. Sometimes I won't write for a while because I don't feel like I deserve to be on here. Cause I keep messing up too. I hope you are at least reading on here. That's what I do hoping a light bulb will turn on. I've read some of your posts, you look like your quite popular. Hang in there. That's what I'm trying to do.

Barb

GrouchoTheCat

Hi Scardy kat,

Welcome back, everyone is welcome here as far as I am concerned.

I know that many people lurk, it's not a bad thing. I just hope that maybe some little thing I post will help someone out there.

As my sponsor says (he says this alot):

Welcome home, you need never drink again.

I found a home in AA, remember, even if nobody else wants you, AA will welcome you with open arms.

And also, as my sponsor says (he says this alot too):

HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH YET !?!?

Introvrtd1

Hey Pat,

You'll get no condemnation here. Just some understanding and experienced advice. So, pick up, dust off, and keep on quittin'.

Introvrtd1

Tazman53

Welcome back Patrick, no pity here either. Look you are drinking again because you have not drank enough to finish your story.

Some folks stories have happy endings, some real bad endings, others end with an obituary.

Patrick I do think of you and pray that one day you will surrender, I pray that you will finally have enough to drink before you die!

You remind me of myself a lot, I spent 10 years trying to quit or moderate my way!

There was no way in hell that this MAN...... yep I said it! MAN!!!! Was ever going to ask anyone for help and actually listen to them...... I was the MAN!!! I could do it on my own, MY WAY!!!!!

Well thank God (What I choose to call my Higher Power), I had enough to drink before I died and was willing to not only ask for help, but to be able to humble myself enough to follow the suggestions I was given in AA.

Good luck Patrick and thank you for reminding me of how painful it is to be back out there drinking, that helps me stay sober.

Pilgrim

Have you had enough yet Homer?

BP44

Patrick, I do not pity you either. I know where you are at. I am a chronic relapser. This last time was a doozy. I had 7 years clean and picked back up and for awhile I would just sneak a few every so often. You know, 2 beers on the way home. Not enough for the wife to suspect I was drinking, and not enough to satisfy my thirst. Well, that was utterly frustrating. I did this off and on for months. I would pick up and then tell myself that wasn't too bright and not do it again for several months, then finally roughly 3 years after that first drink one day on the way home the 2 beers wasn't enough and I decided to buy a bottle of liquor and take it home and proclaim to my wife that I was gonna drink again. I too thought I had it under control, and I conned her pretty good too. The sad reality is that alcoholism has it's way with us, and it never gets better out there. Always worse. That's why I've never seen someone come back in and proclaim that they found a way to go back out and make it work. When you are ready the doors of AA will be open and the teacher will appear.

Tazman53

The doors of AA swing both ways, go out and stay as long as you can..... come back and stay as long as you like and we will not say "I told you so!", we will say "Welcome back, we are glad to have you!".

BP44

Taz, that has been my experience. However, when I was back out there, I thought it was a one way door. I thought, how can I go back and admit defeat all over again. They will think I'm a loser and probably scoff and say "we tried to tell you". It was easier than I thought. And I was welcomed home. Here's the real kicker. Once I got back in, I thought I was gonna pick my recovery back up where I left off. Well I have been dismayed that getting back into recovery doesn't quite work out like getting back into the disease. It has been harder this time. Circumstances are different. Afterall, my life is different than it was in 1991...duh. The disease will grow while we are working to keep it dormant....recovery just dies when we leave it. I hope I never forget this. It has been a painful realization.

BigSis

I have always been accepted in the rooms and around the tables. Exactly as I am. Your message is a strong one, Patrick. My prayers are that your life is a good one, filled with joy.