Derringer

had a chat with my sponsor around 4 months sober, went a bit like this.

Me: so for years, she told me my drinking was THE problem, she would be so happy if I stopped and now I've stopped so she can't complain about that anymore but now it's everything else.

Him: they ever take your favorite drink off the market ?

Me: yeah that did happen, my favorite beer, there one day, gone the next.

Him: stop you drinking ?

me: nah course not ... I just found something else (laugh). ..... Oh 💩 is that what's going on ?

Him: yep

Me: will it stop ?

Him: might wake up to herself, might not. Kinda like what happened to you isn't it ? They have to get sick and tired of being sick and tired, just like we do.
You didn't start drinking just because you met her right ?

Me: No

Him: so she was probably like this too, before she met you but then you gave her the biggest source of complaint she's ever had, now that's dried up, she has to find a new one.

Me: I did notice from the start that she would spend a lot of time on the phone complaining to her girlfriends about this and that, before it became all about me,so I guess you're right.

Him: I've been trying to help guys like you for 20 years, It's not the first time I have heard this (laughs) ... It'll probably sort itself out, just stay sober, keep doing the work and see what happens, I gotta go.

8 months later

Me: I can't take it anymore, it's incessant, she just complains constantly, then I say something, then the real criticism starts on me.

Him: so leave

Me: I'll think about it

Me: (later that afternoon) okay I think I got this ... No one complains about me anymore, not the kids, not the boss, not my work mates, not my friends, not my Mum, no one, I'm actually kicking some goals in life here , it's just her. BUT ... my single biggest complaint is that my wife complains.
I really don't have much to worry about if that's my only source of complaint ... right ?

​​​​​​​Him: yep, your getting it (laughs)