Tommyh

chapter 5 from how it works says

we should work on developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty.

what does rigorous honesty mean to you?
how do you develop that manner of living ?

WMJ1012

It means being emotionally honest.
Emotional sobriety is the name of the game.

It’s not to tough once you been around long enough, done the work and life keeps showing you.

It means following God’s will for you, no matter what anyone else thinks is right for you, especially in a fellowship and society of control freaks, lol. , even if you’re alone and people are threatening you not to.
Always trust that God will give you the next thing you need,if you do His will for YOU.

We are not all the same, and being able to deeply unblind ourselves from “the other type”’s symptoms, is a huge part of recovery.

My experience can help those like me, who’ve never heard anything like it.

And Challenge is always present anytime a change is made.

WMJ1012

Let me post the question back to you.
What does it mean to you?

BlownOne

For me, living rigorous honesty means doing all the little things every day that need to be done or should be done. Paying my bills on time. Keeping the commitments I make to other people. Saying no and sticking to it when necessary. Respecting other peoples boundaries and decisions even when I disagree with them. Above all it means bearing the suffering (whatever it may be) day to day and not taking the easy way out, especially when taking the easy way out would mean hurting someone else or taking advantage of them in some way for my own benefit. Do I do all of the things I claim every day without fail and do them perfectly? No. I fall short constantly. But it's still what I strive to do.

Dave42001

the definition rigorously is, severely exact or accurate; precise: honest.. To me it's living the program!!

I am Responsible. When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that: I am responsible.

Great post Tommy, Thanks for sharing!!

Gottalife

We can sometimes confuse honesty with accuracy. Difficult to be accurate about things we barely remember.

Naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty is how it goes. The only way I could do that was through spiritual experience, and actually, it wasn't me that did it.

I remember when I first came in someone would ask me a question and I would try to give an honest and accurate answer. At leat that was what I thought I was doing. However my responses were peppered with little ego saving justifications and excuses, and I had no idea I was doing this. I couldn't be honest, I was still in my alcoholic mind and relief would come only through the steps.

So I had do do my grasping at step one and go from there. Change has come about since. It seems I was capable of grasping, but there had to be some developing before the honesty began to come through.

aasharon90

I've been a work in process since the
day I entered recovery back in 1990.

Over the years with continued maintenance
of the 12 steps and principles set down for
us to follow and incorporate in all areas of
our life, i eventually got and understood the
H in HOW or WHO.

The first 2 letters, W - willingness and
O - openmindedness came quickly but
the H- in honesty took some work and
practice on a daily bases to finally achieve.

As much as I knew honesty was very
important in my life and recovery, i
struggled with it because i was still selfish,
self - centered, holding onto resentments,
and other character defects.

I did the footwork and I was finally blessed
with this amazing gift of honesty in my life.

It was with acknowledgement and
accountability of past actions, admitting
them and accepting them, that that door
closed and a new one opened up with a
renewed sense freedom I had not experienced
before. Spiritual Progress.

Today, i realize that being thoroughly
honest on a daily bases keeps me grounded
in life and recovery where id rather be
than where i use to be.

I'm still a work in progress and I continue
to remain teachable by learning from each
one you through the fellowship of AA, life
and recovery.

nez

To me it means eliminating denial.

paulokes

Not blaming, myself or others, not denying, justifying, rationalizing, defending...seeing things as they are instead of making a psychological story up that allows me to stay miserable.

When I'm rigorously honest...I find it pretty hard to be miserable

P

Pathwaytofree

It means being honest to God, others and myself about everything.

It means turning to God for truth because turning to mind/ego only results in lies.

But I'm never honest at the expense of hurting another's feelings. That would be spiritual pride.

DayTrader

Suuuuch a long-winded answer comes to mind.... man.... talk about wanting to write a book.

Instead though, I'll approach it from this angle.

Rigorous back in the 20's was defined as: exact, strict, scrupulously accurate. To me, Bill's referring to that lever of honesty: exactly accurate honesty.

My manner of living is not a display of rigorous honesty. It's an admirable goal but I'm certainly not there.

I get that some ppl may look at this as some form of self deprecation but it's anything but. I need to be honest with myself, recognize that if this manner of living demands rigorous honesty that I'm certainly not there yet........even with all I've learned and practiced over 10+ years of recovery in AA. To me it's good news - because I still have more to go for. There's more light in my future if I'm willing to go there and work for it. That whatever level of wholeness and contentedness I feel now.......there's possibly whole new levels I haven't begun to experience yet.

Dave42001

Good stuff, DT

progress not perfection.. 'n no saint. I'm here , sober on a Thursday night.. Double Win in my book!