dsmaxis10

I haven't been to a meeting in six months. I think ten days is the longest I went without a drink. Well I quit going cause I threatened a man after he said something very insulting to the group of 70+. I know I over reacted but I was in psychosis at the time I have schizophrenia and was in an outbreak. Well I'm stable now and would like to go back but I'm so embarrassed . I wasn't having much success while I was going but I was in and out of psychosis for a year and mania. See I have schizoaffective bipolar disorder and fibromyalgia can't even spell it but I got it. Anyways at least I could string together a month or two for four years after four years sober in AA. Should I go back to that group and make amends or just go to a different meeting ?

tomsteve

im glad youre seeing the nature of your wrongs,ds.
I think you already know the right thing to do.
fear= **** Everything And Run
or
Face Everything And Recover

ScottFromWI

If you weren't asked to stay away from the meeting i'd probably go back and make amends. If you were I'd go to a different one. Either way, if AA was working for you before, make it a priority to get to one, regardless of which one it is.

Dee74

I'd go back and make amends

D

Mountainmanbob

I have heard people say some amazingly off the wall things in AA and all are always welcomed back. We share from the heart there from whatever we are thinking and feeling -- it can get rough at times.

Relax and get what you can from AA.
Eventually possibly you can give back a little?

Good luck,
M-Bob

Gottalife

Love and tolerance is our code. There was a good reason for what happened, loss of control. That is very familiar to alcoholics. Any group ought to welcome you Dsm.

dox

Does it have to be one or the other ?

Why not go to different meetings AND go back and make amends (when you're ready) ?

August252015

^^^This is exactly what I was going to say.

I haven't need to make a return/apology/etc anywhere - but I do go to different places - my home group MWF if possible as well as 2-4 meetings at either of two other clubhouses- for the different faces, meeting types and alcoholics. I get a lot out of the combination.

Good luck- as we say, keep coming back.

skg

It's been my experience that you can either save you face or save your a$$. Pride & ego have killed many an alcoholic, my friend.

I'm STILL unstable from time to time--usually when I have lost sight of my spiritual condition--so don't let terminal uniqueness invade your thoughts. The battlefield of the mind is cluttered with mines....
and MEs...

entropy1964

I would say just start attending a meeting, any meeting. Maybe 30 days or so. When you are feeling more stable, and/or are ready, go back to that meeting and make an amends. I'm not sure I'd rush the amends part.....not necessary IMO. I haven't met any alcoholics in recovery, including myself, that don't have quite a few amends to make. But it is suggested we make them at the right time.

Reprieve

You go to aa meetings for yourself, not for anyone else. Eventually, you will maybe come to feel that you have some things to share with another and then yes, you may feel that you are there to help another.

But - for sure, just go for yourself and to take care of yourself. It's a healthy desire to meet our own needs and by focussing on yourself and your wellbeing you will get better. Amends, maybe just pray and meditate on that a little bit and see if it seems like the right thing to do. Then turn it over and let HP provide the right words and the right situation - if it is meant to happen.

Glad you posted here - that's a very good sign. : )

dox

dsmaxis10,

I think a success factor has been identified by process of elimination.

Are you not having much success with sobriety ?

Are you still not going to meetings ?

Keep coming back, man.

You're worth it.

We all are.

NewRomanMan

AA isn't for everybody. It's not the only recovery method that works. It's the one I prefer because I honestly believe the root of my alcoholism was a spiritual illness and being involved in AA addresses that for me. Plus I've made a lot of really really good friends.

SoberCAH

I'm glad that you're going back to AA and that you're here.

Almost all of us have said foolish things at a meeting or 2 that we wish we hadn't shared, and most of us have acted out at one time or another or failed to exhibit proper respect for one another.

We are alcoholics.

We make mistakes.

We are very happy you're here, amigo.

CAPTAINZING2000

Lot of good things said on here .

If you feel an amends is due to the individual you had the altercation with and the group, it would be best to do so. Not for them but for your own peace.

I don't have to like everyone at a meeting or agree with what they say but, I must practice love and tolerance.

There isn't a one of us that's not said something at a meeting that someone didn't like or agree with at some point in our recovery .

Carlotta

Hi DS

I too think you should go back since you were doing good while in AA and have not been able to remain sober since leaving.
You could either go back to your old group now or a bit later when you feel ready and I think the best amend you can do for that group and yourself (aside from apologizing for your behavior) is a living amend by remaining sober and making sure your meds are properly adjusted and you stay on them.

You can do it

PhoenixJ

DSM- what do you want to do? Not what you think you have to do- but honestly want to do. Use the stuff posted here- and work it from there would be what I would do. PJ