michaelg

This morning I had a stellar 5K run. Darn close to a personal best. Typically what I do is come in from my run and want to tell everyone in the house how great I am. But while I was running this morning, it occurred to me that not only was this lacking in humility. But that my wife is just starting out on her own running career and working on getting her 5K timing. So apart from showing off, my boasting could also have the potential of being a discouragement to my rediscovered best friend.

This is NOT my inherent thinking. It is strictly the result of our program and the Higher Power I've come to find as the result. I wish I could claim this clarity of thought as my "norm". Though then I would have to make amends for lying to you all.

While not yet my normal or automatic thinking, it is happening more and more. Progressive victories over selfishness.

God...relieve me of the bondage of self.

Boleo

Spiritual Awakenings are not the result of new knowledge but rather the result of being able to connect the dots between old knowledge.

Today I am not the most humble guy in the world... Yet I am far more humble than I used to be. And much to my surprise, I am far more humble than I ever wanted or intended to be.

"Sought after virtue is not true virtue."
(Lao Tzu - The original Laozi old man)

michaelg

So true Boleo. When I first came in I was actually emphatic to everyone in the room that I might quit drinking. But I am not changing anything else. I certainly didn't want many of the new thought patterns and behaviors I've come to have as the result of AA. In fact for quite a while my ego fought against them. But today, I am so happy they've come to pass.

The lesson I take away from this is not to be upset when I don't get my way. Because I don't even know what I am truly longing for.

Boleo

"When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God's hands were better than anything we could have planned. "
(page 100)