a lot of times
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: falls church, va
Posts: 113
a lot of times
I know that I am a good mother to my son but a lot of times I'm afraid I'm not going to be good enough. I fear that one day I'll wake up and be like my mother, that I won't be able to be there for my son. I hate feeling like this, just wanted to get that off my chest.
Hi there jen
I used to feel that way about my daughter. One of my biggest motivators in recovery was that fear of becoming like my father. So I stayed close to the program and my sponsor and friends, and a couple good shrinks along the way. It worked out just fine for us.
What I learned is that what I did not receive as a child was just old fashioned love. I learned in recovery how to _give_ love to my daughter, wife and family. Wasn't easy at first, but I managed. I wasn't perfect, but it was good enough. Today I have a wonderful relationship with my "kid". She's raised her own little tribe and this October they're going to make me a great-grandpa
So for me that fear was a good motivator. I'm glad I had it and I'm glad I was able to use it in a positive way.
Mike
What I learned is that what I did not receive as a child was just old fashioned love. I learned in recovery how to _give_ love to my daughter, wife and family. Wasn't easy at first, but I managed. I wasn't perfect, but it was good enough. Today I have a wonderful relationship with my "kid". She's raised her own little tribe and this October they're going to make me a great-grandpa
So for me that fear was a good motivator. I'm glad I had it and I'm glad I was able to use it in a positive way.
Mike
((((HUGS)))) Aw, Jen...I understand what you are saying and feeling. Children don't come with manuals and we can only do the very best we know how with what we know now. Sometimes it's almost like child rearing is a crap shoot. Some parents can do virtually everything right and their kids grow up to have problems, and then some parents seem to do everything all wrong and their kids grow up to be amazing. All we can do is try to do the right things. I'm sure you are a great mom because if you weren't, you wouldn't even be worried about these things.
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