Letisha

I am feeling really sad. My best friend in recovery has stopped attending meetings. Her life looks ok from the outside so who am I to say she still needs to attend meetings? I don't think she's relapsed in terms of going back to active addiction. I don't understand why she doesn't want to be part of the group anymore. I don't understand why she doesn't stay in touch with me or other recovery friends anymore. I feel afraid to bring any of this up with her. I want to keep the friendship, yet I don't think the relationship is good for me right now. I have never been in this situation before. I read once that when a person's words and actions don't match it doesn't mean I am crazy, it means there's a discrepancy. I am struggling to be a good friend, live and let live, take care of my own needs, be nonjudgmental, step out of denial re how the relationship affects me...to balance it all. Anyone been here before and have wisdom to share? Thanks for listening.

Ann

I think you are wise to take a big step back to see how this unfolds. You haven't closed and locked the door, you have just chosen to stand in a safer place.

Everyone's recovery is different, some get it without meetings or formal programs, others, like me, require help and guidance along the way and find a recovery program a big help.

I pray your friend is okay. However this unfolds, your own recovery will keep you strong.

MVJ

You are being a good friend just by what you are doing. The only thing you can do is the same as you would for any other friend with or without addiction issues. Let them know you are there for them no matter what happens. The rest is out of your control with or without worry. Good luck

tomsteve

letisha, if you want to be a true friend, bring your concerns up with her. she could very well be waiting for someone to show her they care.
ive had friends call me on my BS and how i was acting and they saved my life.
thats what true friends do- they dont just sit back and watch a friend fall without trying to toss em a lifeline.