subdetox

I'm on day 16 of my suboxone detox. I've been taking 4mg a day (1/4th twice a day) since February 2010. I couldn't afford it anymore after losing my job/insurance so I decided to just quit cold turkey, no tapering down or anything.

Week one was complete utter hell, I had BAD anxiety, felt like I was dying, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep.. it was bad. On day 6 I stood up to go to the bathroom and blacked out, fell down in the hall, and my body started convulsing like I was having a seizure. When I came out of it I immediately started sobbing and told my bf I thought I needed to go to the ER. (I had been taking a lot of clonidine to help with the w/d symptoms, my doc had given them to me for that purpose but they lower your blood pressure and can be dangerous)

So I went to the ER, they ran tests, took my blood etc. Sent me home with trazadone and ativan. A while later I got a call from the ER saying they got my blood work back and I was pregnant (oh great!) So the ativan helped the withdrawal symptoms, Saturday went ok, Sunday morning comes (day 8) and my stomach hurts real real bad, like cramps. I go to the bathroom and there is a lot of blood, I think I'm miscarrying and once again go back to the ER.

Turns out it was a miscarriage, I followed up with my doc the next day, Monday day 9. She gave me lortabs for the pain which I took for 4 days (mon-thurs) which was nice cause thenn I was able to go see family on thanksgiving which I wouldn't have been able to do while sick in withdrawals. So here I am on day 16 from the suboxone and I feel like I might finally be coming out the other side of this horrible nightmare. Today I felt like I had energy this morning for the first time since the detox started. It was short lived but I am feeling more and more human everyday.

I found this site searching suboxone recovery and i'd really like some success stories from other people who made it through the horrible/long suboxone withdrawal. Does life every get normal & happy again? Do you ever start to feel like yourself again? Opposed to an opiate withdrawaling zombie? I miss doing the things I enjoy. I literally lay around in bed or on the couch all day doing nothing and its beyond boring. I just want to be me again. I spent a lot of time in the earlier part of withdrawal reading others stories of withdrawal and now I want to read stories of others who conquered this beast and got back to their regular self! Suboxone withdrawal is so different than other opiate withdrawal, I just need soome success stories now!

Thank you.

Dee74

Hi subdetox

I have no experience with subs but wanted to welcome you anyway. You'll find a lot of support here

D

shepster

This thread doesnt look to promising.Surely someone has quit

ProgramChild

I have not been through Suboxone but I know many addicts in the program who have. I've seen many people go out again because of Suboxone, I've seen many die because of it and so on. There's a few in our sponsorship family who recently got off, but it was only after working the 12 steps. They are still doing well and have not relapsed.

tsmba

I've never heard of someone dying from suboxone. A lot of addicts do a lot of stupid things, then blame the consequences on suboxone, though.

I've done the detox....better than four months ago!

SugarScars

I quit after 18 months of Suboxone treatment. I began at 24 mgs per day and jumped at 1 mg per day. I have not relapsed.

That being said, I had what the doctor called a "good prognosis". This plays a role in recovery, although, of course, personal responsibility plays the BIGGEST role. A hopeless dopefiend CAN become a dopeless hopefiend, regardless of external circumstances, as evidenced by many people who get clean through the program. I was just luckier in that it was a little easier for me than it is for some.

My addiction was a result of pure genetics. All of my environmental factors indicated a positive outcome: a sober, supportive family, no history of abuse, sober, supportive friends, a network of people to call, middle-class upbringing, education, professional experience, no criminal record or legal issues, at least average intelligence. Only mild cognitive impairments due to substance abuse. All of these things they teach you how to create in your own life in NA, but if you already have them by default of your life circumstances, then you've got spiritual principles already built into your life, which gives you an advantage.

A poor prognosis would mean growing up with parents who are in active addiction, history of physical and sexual abuse, not finishing high school, going to jail/prison, lower socioeconomic status, no sober friends (most family and friends are in active addiction), having a lot of brain damage due to long-term substance abuse, and have a lower than average IQ (if you can't reason, you can't make sense of why your behaviors aren't working).

The doctor said I would be able to quit, and he was right. I did.

He was a good doctor, though, and not all of them are. I guess I had that going for me, too.

I'm lucky, and I know it. However, Suboxone treatment saved my life. I was only hours away from overdosing and dying. I was nothing but a street junkie and I was a mess. It was only for a few months, but a few months is enough.

I celebrated one year of off opiates on Nov. 24, 2010.

If I could also say that Suboxone treatment will not help you to avoid the pain of withdrawal and living sober - however, it will give you time to learn important life skills, like tolerating frustration, saying no to yourself, doing things you don't like to do because they're the right thing to do, not giving into the compulsion to use, saving money, and developing healthier relationships - while also healing brain damage due caused by using. All of these things lead to a better outcome.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to share my experience, it helps me to remember why I do not want to use again. I went through too much awfulness to want to go back to that dark world anymore.

SS

COMAB

You are freaking me out. I've been on Suboxone for about 5 months. I can skip a day or two and not have any symptoms of withdraw. Does it take a few days or am i just lucky?

tsmba

Why are you skipping days? Your best course of action is to take your meds as directed....and get busy changing your life. There is nothing to freak about about, other than your own behaviors!

IndyOG

Thanks for your story. Keep us posted. I'm going through the same thing. I'm finding work and normal responsibilities to be very difficult and physically draining but I'm committed to finishing sub for good.

Pie111

Hi there, thanks for your story. I'm currently on 1.5mg a day, just dropped from 2mg over the weekend. Im tapering slowly because I tried to come off last easter but jumped off far to soon and felt really awful for 12 days and Im far to scared to do that again.
I'm tapering every 7 to 10 days because the length this stuff stays in your body is really long so I know my body has got use to what ive tapered down to before dropping further.
I know now I will never use again, I have removed myself so I wont and have every impulse to get off subs.
Ill keep you posted how i go if you like. Good luck

tsmba

How do you "know" that?

TMAC22

I was on between 300 and 600mg of roxicodone a day for close to two years (actually thats where it ended after 2 yrs) and I checked myself into a rehab/detox center in Alabama. They promised me that i would live through the withdraws and feel 110% better when I got out. I started a suboxone detox 24hrs after I checked in. I was in moderate withdraws when I took my first dose of 8mg. I was given 8mg twice a day for 2 days, 4mg a day for 2 days, and 4mg a day once a day for 2 days and then pulled of cold turkey.....I lived. My blood pressure was borderline stoke level for a week but by day 10 I started to return to normal. I didn't sleep for 6 weeks for more than a couple hours but I made it and had a great 7 months till I relapsed. I'm now getting ready to try to do the same detox again, only at home. The difference is I'm not taking nearly what I was before regarding quantity. Also, the first time I stopped 4mg of xanax cold turkey at the same time....that was horrible. Long story short.......it gets better, we all respond differently. I pray we are all strong enough to hold onto our sobriety as long as we can, enjoy it as soon as we get it, and remember why we are willing to go through so much to achieve it. Good luck and God bless.

Dee74

so...your blood pressure was borderline stoke level in a detox, and you're gonna try it again at home, unaided?

I really recommend you rethink that.

My detox was from alcohol but I suffered a series of mini strokes - now I still have coordination problems, I get tired easily, and I get brain freezes where I miss out half of my sentences, or I use words that sound the same but are completely different.

It's 4 years on - these things are with me for life.

I'd think very carefully about whether you want to take that risk.
D

tsmba

Can't argue with that advice....this is NOT something to play with. This is a progressive disease....which means it gets worse whether we are using or not. Of course I found that out the hard way. You've been lucky so far, but your luck WILL run out!

tempWraith

Old thread, new success story.

Just reading that poor sou's original post inspired me to put in my two cent's worth. I took my last dose (one eighth of a 2mg film - Suboxone) on Jan16 - so a bit over two weeks ago. I also stopped 100MG Vyvanse (amphetamine) and 100MG Zoloft. It was right for me to do this -- but, needless to say, consult a pro doctor when coming off any drug, let alone many at one time.

Ah -- and this is my second time coming off the suboxone -- the first time having been extremely worse, stopping cold turkey (4mg?) and basically going through the worst of what I just went through last week -- but for some 40 plus days. And so this time I tapered down slowly to an eighth of a 2mg film, and let me stress here, that if you take anything away from this post, it's that if it's not too late, do taper down your dosage for as long as you can.

So, the 4th and 5th day were the worse for me this time round -- but thankfully the body started to resurrect on day 6, and has proceeded speedily every day thereafter. There has been a bad day or two since -- related to anxiety -- that usually occurs in the evening when I know I still have a few hours to do something before I can go to bed.

Now, flashback to my first detox -- I had 40 days of hell as opposed to the 2 days this time around -- and I can only surmise the slow taper was the primary cause of this.

Regardless, when you're in the throws of that particular circle of hell, a few things helped me thru: driving/hiking.

Driving with destination -- jump in car and drive with a goal -- put on fav music and let the tears flow. Don't recommend sleeping in car, but that's what I had to do. Just having a real goal (i.e., a destination) seemed to help me. I basically drove to state and national parks for a week, and come out the other side healed to a degree.

Gotta run -- best of luck, and on a final parting word -- not only is success possible, it is INEVITABLE. Make it easy on yourself and taper.

tempWraith

continuing ...

Old thread, new success story.

Just reading that poor sou's original post inspired me to put in my two cent's worth. I took my last dose (one eighth of a 2mg film - Suboxone) on Jan16 - so a bit over two weeks ago. I also stopped 100MG Vyvanse (amphetamine) and 100MG Zoloft. It was right for me to do this -- but, needless to say, consult a pro doctor when coming off any drug, let alone many at one time.

Ah -- and this is my second time coming off the suboxone -- the first time having been extremely worse, stopping cold turkey (4mg?) and basically going through the worst of what I just went through last week -- but for some 40 plus days. And so this time I tapered down slowly to an eighth of a 2mg film, and let me stress here, that if you take anything away from this post, it's that if it's not too late, do taper down your dosage for as long as you can.

So, the 4th and 5th day were the worse for me this time round -- but thankfully the body started to resurrect on day 6, and has proceeded speedily every day thereafter. There has been a bad day or two since -- related to anxiety -- that usually occurs in the evening when I know I still have a few hours to do something before I can go to bed.

Now, flashback to my first detox -- I had 40 days of hell as opposed to the 2 days this time around -- and I can only surmise the slow taper was the primary cause of this.

Regardless, when you're in the throws of that particular circle of hell, a few things helped me thru: driving/hiking.

Driving with a destination -- jump in car and drive with a goal -- put on fav music and let the tears flow. Don't recommend sleeping in car, but that's what I had to do. Just having a real goal (i.e., a destination) seemed to help me. I basically drove to state and national parks for a week, and came out the other side healed to a degree.

The first National Park I visited was Mammoth Cave, in the blue-grass state of Kentucky. The restless legs from the previous night were utter agony and frustration, and I thought "I'll give those legs something else to worry about." At Mammoth Cave, I did two tours - basically walking 5 miles of cavern floor, stairs, and hikes to and from cave entrance.

Smack dab in the middle of that cavernous landscape, something heavy let go of me, and I left whatever it was deep underground of that beautiful Kentucky wilderness. I remember asking one of the guides what a particular hole in the cavern floor was -- and he said, "It's just a hole." I like to think it was in that hole, that the essence of my suffering had fell. I came out the other side of that cave a bit lighter, in every sense of the word.

The next two days my legs indeed, had something else to worry about -- as I could hardly bend my knees without crying out in pain. But there is pain, and then there is agony. I'll take the pain of sore muscles over the frustration of restless legs every time.

As the "truth" seems to always lie in between two extremes -- I'm not willing to point to this or that cause of my resurrection. I know that driving somewhere with purpose (i.e., with any destination) helped me tremendously. As to what happened in the cave, it smacks more of some kind of spiritual healing. I'm grateful, in any event.

I've never had any mental health issues like depression - but certainly got a decent measure coming off suboxone both times. And to me, what really gets at the root of things in depression, is that the one suffering cannot see the possibility of happiness, in the present or the future. Blinders have descended over the eyes, and no source of light can seemingly penetrate those shades. It is at this moment that one must take some kind of leap, a leap of reason perhaps, or faith, that your intelligence, your reason, calls out LIGHT on the other side of the blinders, that you most desperately cannot see at the moment. Believe it. It is there, and it will shine strong upon your face when you least expect it. Put your head down and walk drive or crawl from point A to point B. It doesn't matter what Point B is -- just get there, and then make a new Point B.

A final parting word -- not only is success possible, it is INEVITABLE. Make it easy on yourself and taper.

tempWraith

Old thread, new success story.

Just reading that poor sou's original post inspired me to put in my two cent's worth. I took my last dose (one eighth of a 2mg film - Suboxone) on Jan16 - so a bit over two weeks ago. I also stopped 100MG Vyvanse (amphetamine) and 100MG Zoloft. It was right for me to do this -- but, needless to say, consult a pro doctor when coming off any drug, let alone many at one time.

Ah -- and this is my second time coming off the suboxone -- the first time having been extremely worse, stopping cold turkey (4mg?) and basically going through the worst of what I just went through last week -- but for some 40 plus days. And so this time I tapered down slowly to an eighth of a 2mg film, and they me stress here, that if you take anything away from this post, it's that if it's not too late, do taper down your dosage for as long as you can.

So, the 4th and 5th day were the worse for me this time round -- but thankfully the body started to resurrect on day 6, and has proceeded speedily every day thereafter. There has been a bad day or two since -- related to anxiety -- that usually occurs in the evening when I know I still have a few hours to do something before I can go to bed.

Now, flashback to my first detox -- I had 40 days of hell as opposed to the 2 days this time around -- and I can only surmise the slow taper was the primary cause of this.

Regardless, when you're in the throws of that particular circle of hell, a few things helped me thru: driving/hiking.

Driving with destination -- jump in car and drive with a goal -- put on fav music and let the tears flow. Don't recommend sleeping in car, but that's what I had to do. Just having a real goal (i.e., a destination) seemed to help me. I basically drove to state and national parks for a week, and come out the other side healed to a degree.

Gotta run -- best of luck, and on a final parting word -- not only is success possible, it is INEVITABLE. Make it easy on yourself and taper.

tookaleft

Disregard - replied to original post :/

tempWraith

My apologies for screwing up/repeating my posts. Admins, feel free to delete any/all.

tempWraith

If that was directed at me - many thanks!

And to future readers, I can whole-heartedly recommend hot baths, as I must have set some kind of World Record for number of baths in a single day, that first week of my withdrawl