KAD

An important distinction is when I drank, I was very much a loner. I didn't like it any more then than I do sober, but I liked it less to try to feign being sober, hiding bottles, finding excuses to excuse myself to take another drink, paranoia about someone being able to tell (especially paranoia that people knew but just weren't saying anything). That just became too much of a chore. It was exhausting being a drunk! And then, of course, when it kept making me sick, I would never even leave the sofa.

KAD

Hi Thomas, and thanks for the congrats! My sister asked me why someone 55 years sober continues to go to AA meetings. "Doesn't she have it licked by now," she asked? Since my sister is a religious woman, I asked, "You became a Christian when you were a child. You're now 54 and still go to church often. Haven't you got that whole sin and salvation thing licked by now?" She got the point.

Aellyce

I doubt that any of us who drank alcoholically had genuinely more quality social life as drunks vs what is possible sober. Even those of us who used alcohol to alleviate social anxiety initially. I think the effects of large amounts of alcohol distort perception and experience too much and make us primarily too self-absorbed and self-centered for meaningful interactions to be sustained in any form. And then, of course, comes all the hiding and even more exaggerated anxiety as our alcoholism progresses. I am also far, far more social as a sober person, and I was this way also before drinking became a problem, when younger. Alcoholism made me painfully isolated. So definitely no social benefits of drinking for me whatsoever.

One last idea... have you ever tried meetup.com? I used it in different parts of the world and while definitely not all the meetups were interesting, I have found enough good ones. You can also start your own in your area or wherever, centered around a topic that interests you. Yes it starts online, but that's just the initiation, there is no need to get into any extended virtual exchange if you don't want to, just go to the events. Maybe transportation could also be arranged?

KAD

I have looked into that website. Have I mentioned I live in a cultural desert? Not a lot goes on around here! There are lots of things going on in Raleigh, which is close to an hour away. But it's still worth looking into again.

PurpleKnight

For me sometimes I need to keep things very simple, and I don't think there's anything wrong in that, another day clocked off as Sober, isn't that what we're all trying to do here? I remember when I couldn't string a few days Sober, there are many new members here on SR focusing on that goal and that alone.

Some weeks I'll not concentrate on anything other than everyday life and being Sober, no personal growth, no thinking about things, higher powers etc etc, we've got a life time to figure all of that stuff out, and sure it can be important in Sobriety, but we don't need to have it all figured out just yet, life is a marathon and not a sprint.

But sometimes we just need to be Sober, and wait for our next move in life!!