Nothing to say, really
Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
Nothing to say, really
I just feel the need to post something to affirm that I'm still here and still sober. It's been quite a long time since I made it past 3 months. I'm approaching 3 1/2. I went to an AA meeting tonight and this one guy picked up a chip for 6 years. Wow, that seems so far off! I've gotten to know him a little. He's had a rough past - 3 years in prison for the attempted murder of his ex-wife! He's such a normal seeming guy now.
As for myself... still looking for a car, and a job, and finally getting serious about working the steps, instead of just treating AA like a social club. I've heard it said many times and I know it's definitely true for me: I may have another drunk left in me, but I'm pretty certain I have no more recoveries. This is my last chance.
As for myself... still looking for a car, and a job, and finally getting serious about working the steps, instead of just treating AA like a social club. I've heard it said many times and I know it's definitely true for me: I may have another drunk left in me, but I'm pretty certain I have no more recoveries. This is my last chance.
Re-Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 7,909
Glad you checked in, GetMeOut. Congrats on your progress in recovery. Hope you'll check in regularly--this forum is a great place to help out the alcoholic who is still suffering and thus help ourselves at the same time.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: milwaukee wi
Posts: 3,574
Never say Never GetMeOut.. for you only really fail when you stop trying.. and kiddo there are a Million of us out here that will not let you stop.. so put the coffee on and Play this https://youtu.be/rog44pXncRU and know that we are all out here for you.... promise you can do this.. ardy wisconsin
Originally Posted by GetMeOut 
I just feel the need to post something to affirm that I'm still here and still sober. It's been quite a long time since I made it past 3 months. I'm approaching 3 1/2. I went to an AA meeting tonight and this one guy picked up a chip for 6 years. Wow, that seems so far off! I've gotten to know him a little. He's had a rough past - 3 years in prison for the attempted murder of his ex-wife! He's such a normal seeming guy now.
As for myself... still looking for a car, and a job, and finally getting serious about working the steps, instead of just treating AA like a social club. I've heard it said many times and I know it's definitely true for me: I may have another drunk left in me, but I'm pretty certain I have no more recoveries. This is my last chance.
As for myself... still looking for a car, and a job, and finally getting serious about working the steps, instead of just treating AA like a social club. I've heard it said many times and I know it's definitely true for me: I may have another drunk left in me, but I'm pretty certain I have no more recoveries. This is my last chance.
Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
Just had an interview with a job placement service. That went well. I have some additional tests to complete online and then they'll begin finding a job for me. In the meantime, gotta find a car! I really don't look forward to that because 1. I can't really afford a car, 2. I can't really afford the insurance (it will be high just because of a DWI charge, never mind what it will be like if I'm convicted). I've got an uphill climb ahead of me, all because of alcohol. That's the part I must never, ever forget.
I'm feeling some emotional pain this afternoon regarding my kids. I had emailed my ex asking if the girls wanted any of their things from my house, since they're not here to enjoy them anymore. When I asked, I thought I hoped they would ask for some of their things but, now that they actually have, I feel conflicted and sad. It hurts my heart just to walk into their rooms. Now I have to go through their things to find the stuff they want. Again, direct consequences of my drinking...
Tell me it's gonna get better.
I'm feeling some emotional pain this afternoon regarding my kids. I had emailed my ex asking if the girls wanted any of their things from my house, since they're not here to enjoy them anymore. When I asked, I thought I hoped they would ask for some of their things but, now that they actually have, I feel conflicted and sad. It hurts my heart just to walk into their rooms. Now I have to go through their things to find the stuff they want. Again, direct consequences of my drinking...
Tell me it's gonna get better.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Hey 
Yes "it's gonna get better" - quoting Mr GetMeOut.
It's great that you are doing all these things to find a job, and a car. If it were me, I would probably first focus on the job and then the car, assuming that the job does not require having a car of course.
I recall similar sadness from you about roaming their rooms in your house and not being able to be with them. My heart goes out to you as I now know very well about myself that such a "forced" (even if self-induced) disconnection with the people I love and have a lot of history with, would make me suffer greatly also, even if I sometimes deny it to myself.
So how is the step work in AA going?
Yes "it's gonna get better" - quoting Mr GetMeOut.
It's great that you are doing all these things to find a job, and a car. If it were me, I would probably first focus on the job and then the car, assuming that the job does not require having a car of course.
I recall similar sadness from you about roaming their rooms in your house and not being able to be with them. My heart goes out to you as I now know very well about myself that such a "forced" (even if self-induced) disconnection with the people I love and have a lot of history with, would make me suffer greatly also, even if I sometimes deny it to myself.
So how is the step work in AA going?
, Way to go GMO! I am a poet and didn't know it!Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
Originally Posted by Aellyce
So how is the step work in AA going?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Originally Posted by GetMeOut
Just had my first session with my sponsor, since returning from rehab, tonight. It went well, I guess. It didn't necessarily show progress in the sense that I'm working the steps correctly yet, but it does show that I'm willing to learn and try. I made a list of resentments today and, as I wrote it, it became patently obvious I pretty much loathe my ex-wife. I actually felt physically exhausted after unloading those feelings, and there were plenty more where those came from. She isn't the only source of resentment either. It appears I'm pretty raw right now. I feel angry and frightened when it seems every aspect of my life is out of control. That's where the work needs to begin. My sponsor and I have our work cut out for us!
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