so what
Closing the gates of Oblivion
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: OK, USA
Posts: 273
Sorry, Salt Lake is nowhere near me, but thank you! We are out here. We just live a little too far away. I hope to see you again and again, no matter what happens. And for the record 2muchpain, I would buy your coffee and my own cigarettes, lol.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Hi 2much,
I also often felt pretty similarly to what you describe while drinking heavily. In my case, I can honestly say it was the effect of alcohol abuse and nothing else, not the external world, not other people, just my brain chemically altered. For me it was worse when I was also deep in depression (while drinking).
Ironically, these kinds of feelings led me to drop my guards significantly to finally seek help from others - both locally and here on SR... Just could not stand the alienation anymore. I was surprised how quickly it had changed, but I had to do quite a few things for it actively from forcing myself hardly to get out against my momentary desire to changing my diet and lifestyle to of course reducing the drink (but quitting was best in the end). It was a very pleasant series of surprises how welcoming and helpful most people were when I made efforts to break the ice of isolation...
So like others, I would also suggest that you try to get out, perhaps to meetings or even just solo activities in an environment where there are other people... for me just observing the world helps tons sometimes.
Best to you!
I also often felt pretty similarly to what you describe while drinking heavily. In my case, I can honestly say it was the effect of alcohol abuse and nothing else, not the external world, not other people, just my brain chemically altered. For me it was worse when I was also deep in depression (while drinking).
Ironically, these kinds of feelings led me to drop my guards significantly to finally seek help from others - both locally and here on SR... Just could not stand the alienation anymore. I was surprised how quickly it had changed, but I had to do quite a few things for it actively from forcing myself hardly to get out against my momentary desire to changing my diet and lifestyle to of course reducing the drink (but quitting was best in the end). It was a very pleasant series of surprises how welcoming and helpful most people were when I made efforts to break the ice of isolation...
So like others, I would also suggest that you try to get out, perhaps to meetings or even just solo activities in an environment where there are other people... for me just observing the world helps tons sometimes.
Best to you!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Here, EH!!!
Posts: 1,337
When people put their #'s on the newcomers package, do you call?
I found, on that list that there is always a few guys willing to help. They are these so called "Big Book Thumpers" they realize that in order for them to stay sober they must freely give away what was so freely given to them. Others are just making themselves look good by putting their # on the list. You see these type of show-boaters all the time. So, I found that I should try to show up early to the meeting, help the room out a little by making the coffee, cleaning up. Then talk to people, before the meeting. Then after the meeting is done, stick around for a bit, help clean up, put away coffee mugs, empty the coffee jug, talk to fellow members. Get a sponsor, get a big book, read the big book, understand the big book by doing a few big book studies from people who know what they are doing, start to work on the 12 steps right away, do not delay. This is a life or death errand. Its actually very simple stuff here. But its hard work. Its hard to talk to complete strangers.
A note of warning. Everyone in the AA rooms are not healthy souls. Sometimes the best talker in the rooms is the slickest most sickest person around. Do not lend money out. Do not get into a sexual relationship. We humans that attend AA meetings are just sick people trying to get better. Most people, THESE DAYS, are at the meetings for different reasons. Some for the judge or prosecution. Others for family or friends or work. Or to get thier license, home, kids, car, house, health, whatever back.
I found, on that list that there is always a few guys willing to help. They are these so called "Big Book Thumpers" they realize that in order for them to stay sober they must freely give away what was so freely given to them. Others are just making themselves look good by putting their # on the list. You see these type of show-boaters all the time. So, I found that I should try to show up early to the meeting, help the room out a little by making the coffee, cleaning up. Then talk to people, before the meeting. Then after the meeting is done, stick around for a bit, help clean up, put away coffee mugs, empty the coffee jug, talk to fellow members. Get a sponsor, get a big book, read the big book, understand the big book by doing a few big book studies from people who know what they are doing, start to work on the 12 steps right away, do not delay. This is a life or death errand. Its actually very simple stuff here. But its hard work. Its hard to talk to complete strangers.
A note of warning. Everyone in the AA rooms are not healthy souls. Sometimes the best talker in the rooms is the slickest most sickest person around. Do not lend money out. Do not get into a sexual relationship. We humans that attend AA meetings are just sick people trying to get better. Most people, THESE DAYS, are at the meetings for different reasons. Some for the judge or prosecution. Others for family or friends or work. Or to get thier license, home, kids, car, house, health, whatever back.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Here, EH!!!
Posts: 1,337
Oh I was just reminded of a statement. Which came from Canada.
Responsibility Statement.
I am responsable when anyone anywhere reaches out for help I want the hand of AA always to be there and for that I am responsable.
Responsibility Statement.
I am responsable when anyone anywhere reaches out for help I want the hand of AA always to be there and for that I am responsable.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
Matt4X4
I have come to meetings early and staid late. I'll admit I didn't help out much around meetings though. I was going to a meeting, and announced that I was new there, but nobody gave me their numbers. Otherwise, I would of called them. I've been to several meetings, and still the same results. I don't blame the people there, and don't blame myself, because I worked hard to find connections, but I found myself feeling more alone after I left than when I went into the meeting. I even expressed this concern twice at meetings, but ended up with nothing. But it is what it is. Nobody's fault. /\
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[pkjuides67+/+I still go to meetings when I'm not drinking, but go just to be around people with the same problem I have, and to hear their stories
I have come to meetings early and staid late. I'll admit I didn't help out much around meetings though. I was going to a meeting, and announced that I was new there, but nobody gave me their numbers. Otherwise, I would of called them. I've been to several meetings, and still the same results. I don't blame the people there, and don't blame myself, because I worked hard to find connections, but I found myself feeling more alone after I left than when I went into the meeting. I even expressed this concern twice at meetings, but ended up with nothing. But it is what it is. Nobody's fault. /\
\
[pkjuides67+/+I still go to meetings when I'm not drinking, but go just to be around people with the same problem I have, and to hear their stories
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