One Year and Under Club Part 39
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Originally Posted by IWLSAST 
Michael Keaton in Night Shift - What if you feed the tuna mayo before you catch them?
Clicks recorder on and says..."Call Starkist"
Clicks recorder on and says..."Call Starkist"
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 167
Day 2 for me. On to that target of 7 days sober. I've been ill in bed all day today with a virus which i'm pretty sure i picked up due to my useless immune system from ploughing the drink so much. A week tomorrow is my birthday and i just know i won't be able to resist a drink 
x
x
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Join Date: May 2011
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,131
Originally Posted by SparkyMcSparky
Hey NT, from my experience, if you don't do the latter, you're doing a pale imitation of the former. And if you relapse again, you're doing neither one.
Thanks for your input SparkyMac.....
My wife and kids prefer sober dad to drunk argumentative dad, and have no issues giving me the rope I need to get sober. Chances are your wife and kids will be more than encouraging if you need the necessary time to either reflect, research, or meet with those who can help you.
Thanks for your input SparkyMac.....
My wife and kids prefer sober dad to drunk argumentative dad, and have no issues giving me the rope I need to get sober. Chances are your wife and kids will be more than encouraging if you need the necessary time to either reflect, research, or meet with those who can help you.
Once I was on my own I became over-competitive (competitiveness is in our genes) and pushed a lot of friends away. I was a terrible loser at times too.
My goal was to catch up and once I accomplished that, my next goal was to surpass ....and I did that. I got to the finish line, but no one was around. And I'm not the type to put my tail between my legs and to go back looking for everyone. That time has passed anyway.
I think once I realized that no one from my past was around, I just started drinking more to pass the time. I also refuse(d) to spend time with anyone that I'm not or no longer compatible with.
Contrary to my last statement, I'm a complete extrovert and my wife is an introvert. That particularly may lack compatibility, but it's a good balance in our relationship.
Nevertheless, all of this sometimes puts me in no-man's land without a drink in my hand!
I mean, I am, where I should be now. I come right home after work, make dinner when it's my turn and help around the house. Heck I did that while I was drinking. We have good jobs. I spend time with my family. We have a great son. My wife and I challenge each other and get along well. We have good days and bad days like anyone else. I'm laid back.....I'm a very good person and treat those that I know and those I do not know with respect.
Yes, I have my moments. I have my opinions everyday, but I make an effort to be fair. Ultimately, I've matured...I've learned. I've paid my dues....
Perhaps, I am just used to trying to hard or still being competitive, like I need to stay ahead of the next guy.
Like my mind is saying...Everything's fine!....Hey, now wait! What's up with that? Everything can't fine, I must be missing something. Chill-out dude....
Thiiiinnnkkking tooooo mmmuuucccchhh
Old habits die hard.......
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Join Date: May 2011
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,131
Originally Posted by Gilmer
You might be surprised, Messyliver. If you stay away from known drinking festivities and just don't take a drink into your hand, you will be sure to resist.
Originally Posted by DrakeCKC
Congrats on 100 (+) Spark! 
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
ML - I've been where you are. Alcohol use definitely weakens our defenses and makes us more prone to picking up viruses. I used to drink through pretty much everything, except illnesses involving fevers or vomiting. Since quitting drinking 8 months ago I've only been ill 2 days - and I work in childcare.
For me, there was always a reason to drink. I know it seems impossible not to drink on your birthday. For me, it also seemed impossible not to drink on other people's birthdays, at parties, on the weekend, and in the evening. And I didn't know what to do with all that time that I would have spent looking forward to drinking, or planning for drinking.
I would come on SR and fill that time reading or posting, just passing time til I could fall asleep. I also went to AA, if nothing else for a booze free setting to pass the time.
It's your choice whether you drink. If you don't want to, you need to arm yourself with plans on how to stay away from it.
You can do it, ML.
For me, there was always a reason to drink. I know it seems impossible not to drink on your birthday. For me, it also seemed impossible not to drink on other people's birthdays, at parties, on the weekend, and in the evening. And I didn't know what to do with all that time that I would have spent looking forward to drinking, or planning for drinking.
I would come on SR and fill that time reading or posting, just passing time til I could fall asleep. I also went to AA, if nothing else for a booze free setting to pass the time.
It's your choice whether you drink. If you don't want to, you need to arm yourself with plans on how to stay away from it.
You can do it, ML.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
I feel like I'm clogging up the thread today. 
NT - You're a good guy, you work hard, you like people, you've made a few mistakes with your friendships, but many people have. (I watched people's friendships with each other wax and wane as a stay at home mom in the 'burbs). I think that sometimes the boundaries that we need to fix scream out the loudest to us. It's our intuition's way of reminding us who we are. I wonder if your sense of longing, sense that you're missing something, is because you're missing hanging with like minded buddies?
This doesn't take away from your great relationship with your wife, or your sweet relationship with your son. Marriage, parenthood and personal satisfaction don't need to be mutually exclusive.
Does your son play sports or is he involved in cub scouts or other activities that need adult volunteers? Or is there a cause that you're passionate about? Being a volunteer fills the organizations' needs for help and will surround you with lots of people. There are also recovery support groups, AA, etc, which are very social organizations.
NT - You're a good guy, you work hard, you like people, you've made a few mistakes with your friendships, but many people have. (I watched people's friendships with each other wax and wane as a stay at home mom in the 'burbs). I think that sometimes the boundaries that we need to fix scream out the loudest to us. It's our intuition's way of reminding us who we are. I wonder if your sense of longing, sense that you're missing something, is because you're missing hanging with like minded buddies?
This doesn't take away from your great relationship with your wife, or your sweet relationship with your son. Marriage, parenthood and personal satisfaction don't need to be mutually exclusive.
Does your son play sports or is he involved in cub scouts or other activities that need adult volunteers? Or is there a cause that you're passionate about? Being a volunteer fills the organizations' needs for help and will surround you with lots of people. There are also recovery support groups, AA, etc, which are very social organizations.
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 167
It's not just my birthday but i live abroad and my parents are coming to visit. Might be a bit difficult to avoid. I'm going to aim for 7 days and that will be a huge achievement and try to take every day from there i think :| x
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ML, If you tell them you've given up drinking before they arrive, it might be easier to avoid temptation. Right now it sounds as if you're setting yourself up for failure.
The problem with planning to drink just for one night is that you often get caught in an avalanche, and you can't stop again nearly as easily as you did before. People often relapse for years!
If you've decided that alcohol is bad for you and you genuinely want to live a sober life, don't take chances. You can't guarantee how things will end.
The problem with planning to drink just for one night is that you often get caught in an avalanche, and you can't stop again nearly as easily as you did before. People often relapse for years!
If you've decided that alcohol is bad for you and you genuinely want to live a sober life, don't take chances. You can't guarantee how things will end.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,287
Sparky, big congrats on 100+ days!!!
ML, take it one day at a time but it helps to plan ahead, especially during the first year. If you normally drink on your birthday, could this be the year to celebrate in an extra special way by staying sober? That would be a super gift to yourself.
ML, take it one day at a time but it helps to plan ahead, especially during the first year. If you normally drink on your birthday, could this be the year to celebrate in an extra special way by staying sober? That would be a super gift to yourself.
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 2,294
So last night the friend that moved called and told me he was meeting some other folks for dinner at a bar/restaurant near by. Long been a regular there even now that I do not spend $40-$50 a night like I used to. The bartender and waiters know I do not drink.
So Derek hands me my usual club soda and lime with a splash of cranberry and I carry it to the table. I take a sip and there is a LOT of vodka in it! I guess it is a sign of a good recovery that I spit it out in the glass and immediately thought "that cr... is AWFUL!"
Derek was so apologetic and I told him I now had to give my 18 month chip back! He had 3 drinks that looked alike and in the rush I got the wrong one.
How did I ever think that nasty venom was good?
So Derek hands me my usual club soda and lime with a splash of cranberry and I carry it to the table. I take a sip and there is a LOT of vodka in it! I guess it is a sign of a good recovery that I spit it out in the glass and immediately thought "that cr... is AWFUL!"
Derek was so apologetic and I told him I now had to give my 18 month chip back! He had 3 drinks that looked alike and in the rush I got the wrong one.
How did I ever think that nasty venom was good?
Working-cl*** pseudo tough
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 485
Drake, you have to turn your chip back in for not drinking?
Sounds no different than spitting out mouthwash.
If so, hell of a way to lose a good sobriety marker. Sorry to hear that.
ML, for the first month, just take it one day at a time. Have a plan for alternative beverages if you are going to be at a place where there is drinking, and you can't avoid it. Only go if you feel strong enough to avoid drinking when facing temptations. And yes, tell others you quit drinking - if they are good friends or family, they won't offer you drinks. Plus, you now place an external pressure on you not to drink.
It's easy to drink if no one knows you quit, right.
And eat lots - good filling fatty foods like ice cream and fried chicken. Eat till you're sick - you won't feel like drinking, trust me. Buffet visits may be a good tool to use.
Sounds no different than spitting out mouthwash.
If so, hell of a way to lose a good sobriety marker. Sorry to hear that.
ML, for the first month, just take it one day at a time. Have a plan for alternative beverages if you are going to be at a place where there is drinking, and you can't avoid it. Only go if you feel strong enough to avoid drinking when facing temptations. And yes, tell others you quit drinking - if they are good friends or family, they won't offer you drinks. Plus, you now place an external pressure on you not to drink.
It's easy to drink if no one knows you quit, right.
And eat lots - good filling fatty foods like ice cream and fried chicken. Eat till you're sick - you won't feel like drinking, trust me. Buffet visits may be a good tool to use.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
A week tomorrow is my birthday and i just know i won't be able to resist a drink x
You'll have many sober birthdays if that's the case - so why not make this one the first?
You can start your new life now, in a week, next year or five years from now...but I know which one I'd pick ML.
It's not easy - but if it was easy we wouldn't need so much help
D
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 2,294
I was just kidding Spark.. I don't think he knew what I was talking about.
Funny thing, I used to love the taste of vodka, prided myself on being able to tell Stoli from Tito's from Grey Goose, etc. Now it was like gasoline.
Funny thing, I used to love the taste of vodka, prided myself on being able to tell Stoli from Tito's from Grey Goose, etc. Now it was like gasoline.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: England
Posts: 808
MessyLiver I used to think I would never be able to go through things like my birthday and christmas sober either, but the last two birthdays i've had I stayed sober and it was surprisingly easy!
I think the key is to plan something to do sober with your day, and try not to think of it as 'resisting drink' but instead try to think of how much more enjoyable it will be sober, how much better it will be being able to remember everything you did and said and how proud you will be of your achievement when it's done.
Trust me, you can do this. We're all rooting for you
Drake You averted disaster there! I inadvertently used a throat spray that contained ethanol in it a couple of weeks back, it had a familiar poisonous taste and I had terrible cravings for about a week afterwards! Good job spitting it straight out, I thought you were being serious when you said you had to hand your chip back in too! My heart sank!
Hope all are well today
Keep fighting the good fight
I think the key is to plan something to do sober with your day, and try not to think of it as 'resisting drink' but instead try to think of how much more enjoyable it will be sober, how much better it will be being able to remember everything you did and said and how proud you will be of your achievement when it's done.
Trust me, you can do this. We're all rooting for you
Drake You averted disaster there! I inadvertently used a throat spray that contained ethanol in it a couple of weeks back, it had a familiar poisonous taste and I had terrible cravings for about a week afterwards! Good job spitting it straight out, I thought you were being serious when you said you had to hand your chip back in too! My heart sank!
Hope all are well today
Keep fighting the good fight
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