Problem with the term Alcoholic...
Matt M
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 490
Originally Posted by Hawks 
I loved everything about drinking.
The taste, the smell, the bottles, the labels.
There were a few spirits I didn't like raw (Gin for example) but I liked most raw & if I didn't, there wasn't a spirit I couldn't mix. (Gin, lime, tonic ... beautiful)
I wore t-shirts with beer brands on them, hats with beer brands.
I even loved the smell of a pub the next morning at 7am when the owner used to let us in at for an illegal "Lock In" drinking session on a Sunday.
The smell of a pub the next morning was like the smell of roasting coffee or flowers ... for me. Sniff sniff ..... aaaaahhhhh ..... I'm home.
I was "addicted" after my first "unsupervised" drink ... I drank as much as I could get my hands on from the age of 12.
The taste, the smell, the bottles, the labels.
There were a few spirits I didn't like raw (Gin for example) but I liked most raw & if I didn't, there wasn't a spirit I couldn't mix. (Gin, lime, tonic ... beautiful)
I wore t-shirts with beer brands on them, hats with beer brands.
I even loved the smell of a pub the next morning at 7am when the owner used to let us in at for an illegal "Lock In" drinking session on a Sunday.
The smell of a pub the next morning was like the smell of roasting coffee or flowers ... for me. Sniff sniff ..... aaaaahhhhh ..... I'm home.
I was "addicted" after my first "unsupervised" drink ... I drank as much as I could get my hands on from the age of 12.
I'm fairly sure I never liked the taste.
The only enjoyment I got out of alcohol was the way it made me feel.
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,476
What can I say ......Love at first drink ... I came to realise just how in love, infatuated & obsessed I was after I got sober.
It was my "lifestyle"
I put alcohol first, everything else was second and all the subsequent drama ... crashed cars, police cells, fights, ambulances, hospitals, stitches, lost girlfriends, lost friends .... it was all just "unpleasant side effects" in pursuit of that lifestyle.
It was my "lifestyle"
I put alcohol first, everything else was second and all the subsequent drama ... crashed cars, police cells, fights, ambulances, hospitals, stitches, lost girlfriends, lost friends .... it was all just "unpleasant side effects" in pursuit of that lifestyle.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 10
If a situation arises in which I need an explanation I tell people I am in recovery as that covers a lot of different things. I am an alcoholic by the commonly accepted definition but I am so much more than that. My drinking stemmed from thinking problems and I am in recovery from those erroneous patterns. I am in recovery from negative self talk, and from destructive sexual behavior and on and on...
I recommend watching Anonymous People. (It's on Netflix). It is a good movie all the way around but it does discuss this as well.
At the end of the day, only you know who you are. We don't need to label (justify) to other people. The goal is to be the best we can be. Actions matter. Words don't.
I recommend watching Anonymous People. (It's on Netflix). It is a good movie all the way around but it does discuss this as well.
At the end of the day, only you know who you are. We don't need to label (justify) to other people. The goal is to be the best we can be. Actions matter. Words don't.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
I’ve been sober for a good # of years and still don’t care for the name alcoholic. My hang up and I think it reminds me of the derelicts in hallways and the gutter. My head said I wasn’t that bad, I neglected to say the word YET as I was headed there also.
Today years later at meetings I introduce myself as an alcoholic and add that it means I cannot drink alcohol in safety.
BE WELL
I’ve been sober for a good # of years and still don’t care for the name alcoholic. My hang up and I think it reminds me of the derelicts in hallways and the gutter. My head said I wasn’t that bad, I neglected to say the word YET as I was headed there also.
Today years later at meetings I introduce myself as an alcoholic and add that it means I cannot drink alcohol in safety.
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 812
For myself, I am an alcoholic and I will always be one because of the biological/physiological aspect.
When I start drinking, I develop an insanely strong craving for more drinks that is beyond my control or willpower. To stop after one or two drinks is torturous for me. In the height of my alcoholism, I would opt to not drink at all rather than have a few, because just having a few for me is uncomfortable and ... painful.
And that condition will not change. I will never be able to have a few without that craving developing. Oh, trust me, I have tried repeatedly to have just a few or I have stayed sober for weeks, months, a year then picked up again to see if my body had reset itself to "normal." Never happened.
So, yes, I am an alcoholic. A sober alcoholic. A non-active alcoholic, a recovered alcoholic, but an alkie nonetheless. I will always be one. If I drink, what I described above will yet again happen to me.
The mental obsession is related to my alcoholism, but different. The obsession can be treated. The obsession can be cured! I have been cured of the obsession to drink. I will never be cured of alcoholism.
When I start drinking, I develop an insanely strong craving for more drinks that is beyond my control or willpower. To stop after one or two drinks is torturous for me. In the height of my alcoholism, I would opt to not drink at all rather than have a few, because just having a few for me is uncomfortable and ... painful.
And that condition will not change. I will never be able to have a few without that craving developing. Oh, trust me, I have tried repeatedly to have just a few or I have stayed sober for weeks, months, a year then picked up again to see if my body had reset itself to "normal." Never happened.
So, yes, I am an alcoholic. A sober alcoholic. A non-active alcoholic, a recovered alcoholic, but an alkie nonetheless. I will always be one. If I drink, what I described above will yet again happen to me.
The mental obsession is related to my alcoholism, but different. The obsession can be treated. The obsession can be cured! I have been cured of the obsession to drink. I will never be cured of alcoholism.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by Adama82
But in AA meetings you kind of have to introduce yourself as "I'm an alcoholic". I'd rather say, "Hi, I'm so-and-so and I'm a strong willed individual that is fighting alcohol dependence!"
But that's just me. If one isn't engaging in the addiction, I don't think you can be considered an "addict" or "alcoholic". 1 week, or 10 years sober -- I think you can call yourself a "recovering alcoholic", as recovery never stops.
But that's just me. If one isn't engaging in the addiction, I don't think you can be considered an "addict" or "alcoholic". 1 week, or 10 years sober -- I think you can call yourself a "recovering alcoholic", as recovery never stops.
'Recovering human', 'non-drinker', 'I'm so and so and I don't want to drink today' among them.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Eastern Us
Posts: 1,366
I used to drink too much. Now I don't drink. Ever. That is enough for me. I don't label myself an alcoholic. If someone fines value in doing so then have at it.
I used to smoke too much. Now I don't smoke. Ever...
I used to smoke too much. Now I don't smoke. Ever...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
I am an alcoholic but I don't really use that term in my posts here or when I'm talking to others. I can't drink because it brought mental and physical torture to my life, every day.
We can call ourselves Mary Poppins or Hoobaloobabaloos as long as we don't drink. The label doesn't mean a thing.
I don't think most of us starting drinking because we liked the taste. Maybe I'm wrong but I always thought that vodka tasted like ****. It the effect that I liked until it turned on me.
We can call ourselves Mary Poppins or Hoobaloobabaloos as long as we don't drink. The label doesn't mean a thing.
I don't think most of us starting drinking because we liked the taste. Maybe I'm wrong but I always thought that vodka tasted like ****. It the effect that I liked until it turned on me.
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,476
The introduction of "I'm so and so and I'm an alcoholic "
actually sprung out of a need to "identify " who was who at very early meetings.
AA took its name from the book, which was published in 1939.
The "identify " introduction pre-dates the book.
The very early meetings were held in members houses and non alcoholic spouses were always encouraged to attend as were children above a certain age.
They believed very deeply in "family recovery " not just the recovery of the alcoholic themselves.
So it was necessary for the alcoholic to identify as such, the non alcoholic spouses to identify as such and the children to identify as such.
Nowadays there is al anon and Al a teen.
But the "identify " thing has remained to this day.
actually sprung out of a need to "identify " who was who at very early meetings.
AA took its name from the book, which was published in 1939.
The "identify " introduction pre-dates the book.
The very early meetings were held in members houses and non alcoholic spouses were always encouraged to attend as were children above a certain age.
They believed very deeply in "family recovery " not just the recovery of the alcoholic themselves.
So it was necessary for the alcoholic to identify as such, the non alcoholic spouses to identify as such and the children to identify as such.
Nowadays there is al anon and Al a teen.
But the "identify " thing has remained to this day.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
I remember opening the pack, smoking a cig then lamenting that I only had 19 left. I felt the same way about beers. Most of the time I loved the taste of my beers, except when I was really hung over, but I still drank them no matter what they tasted like. Yeah, I'm an alcoholic. I am so glad that I don't smoke or drink anymore.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
Posts: 1,708
i can remember when i was just 18 and i was in trouble again thanks to drinking and getting into trouble, now i have been brought up well i know right from wrong yet put drink inside of me and i become a monster
i never knew what the hell was wrong with me, i went to see drs and they came up with all sorts of terms for bad behaviour and gave me pills etc to curb my anger when drunk
they never worked
all i wanted to do was drink normaly like everyone else and enjoy having a good time with drink
the key here is i never knew what was wrong with me, when i would wake up the next day full of fear and shame for what i did the night before it was just no fun at all yet i loved the drink and in my mind you can not have a good time in life unless there was drink around
like i said i was only 18 and in trouble big time,
now imagine when i finaly came into aa at 23 and people started talking about taking a drink and then getting so drunk they would do all sorts of things there ashamed of ???/
wow there are other people out there who are like me i thought i was the only one as most of the people i would drink with never drank like me nor did they end up in police cells or make a fool of themselves, they some how had a control over it that would make them stop once they had enough
so the term alcoholic to me finaly give me a name for my condition
i do wonder about people who never drank like me who call themselves alcoholics as i dont get much identification with them, like duel addicts who could control themselves to not get drunk ????
drinking and getting plastered drunk is what i wished i never ever did, if i could drink a few and not get drunk and end up in trouble then i wouldnt need aa nor the term alcoholic
if i could of said to myself hey this drink is causeing you huge problems and stop drinking then i would of and this is were that mental side of things come in
as no matter how much i knew what the drink would do to me, no matter how many times i would end up waking up the next day full of guild shame and remorse, i would still try my hardest next time to not get drunk
my problem back then was i was a weekend bender drinker i could go all week without a drink with no problem but come the weekend well it was party time
except i didnt party
most of the time i would buy booze sit at home listen to sad music and get drunk and when i had enough drink inside me i might have the guts to go out and face the world in the pubs and then end up causeing trouble and getting barred or what ever and then wake up the next day full of shame wishing i never did it
in the end my drinking progresses to daily drinking and it started because i needed a cure for my hangovers and having a drink the next day would cure my hangover but also it would set of the trigger again for more booze and end up blacked out drunk again
on and on it goes until you lose everything, end up a drunken bum with nothing left
this is what an alcoholic of my type ends up like and i am not the only one
thats just the booze issue i havent even touched on the living life issue sober or how selfish a person i have been all my life
i want things done my way or no way i have never been one to conform to anything i want to change the world to my way
and thats living sober but i never knew any of this about myself until i got honest and looked deep inside me thanks to the program of aa
so for me aa has shown me by the other members experiences that i can now find a name for my illness, i can fit in with these people as there so like me i am no longer alone thinking i am the only one with this problem
i am not a problem drinker nor a person who has a problem with drinking 3 or 5 drinks daily i dont do drugs i dont mix drink with drugs
i just take a drink and i can not stop it nor control it once its in my system
i am an alcoholic i have no control over alcohol and i needed to fully accept that if i was ever going to have a chance of changing
but that just for me
people can call themselves whatever they want but i do see many people who i dont think are alcoholics but people who have a drink problem try to understand what alcoholics is all about and if there not an alcoholic there never going to understand it
i never knew what the hell was wrong with me, i went to see drs and they came up with all sorts of terms for bad behaviour and gave me pills etc to curb my anger when drunk
they never worked
all i wanted to do was drink normaly like everyone else and enjoy having a good time with drink
the key here is i never knew what was wrong with me, when i would wake up the next day full of fear and shame for what i did the night before it was just no fun at all yet i loved the drink and in my mind you can not have a good time in life unless there was drink around
like i said i was only 18 and in trouble big time,
now imagine when i finaly came into aa at 23 and people started talking about taking a drink and then getting so drunk they would do all sorts of things there ashamed of ???/
wow there are other people out there who are like me i thought i was the only one as most of the people i would drink with never drank like me nor did they end up in police cells or make a fool of themselves, they some how had a control over it that would make them stop once they had enough
so the term alcoholic to me finaly give me a name for my condition
i do wonder about people who never drank like me who call themselves alcoholics as i dont get much identification with them, like duel addicts who could control themselves to not get drunk ????
drinking and getting plastered drunk is what i wished i never ever did, if i could drink a few and not get drunk and end up in trouble then i wouldnt need aa nor the term alcoholic
if i could of said to myself hey this drink is causeing you huge problems and stop drinking then i would of and this is were that mental side of things come in
as no matter how much i knew what the drink would do to me, no matter how many times i would end up waking up the next day full of guild shame and remorse, i would still try my hardest next time to not get drunk
my problem back then was i was a weekend bender drinker i could go all week without a drink with no problem but come the weekend well it was party time
except i didnt party
most of the time i would buy booze sit at home listen to sad music and get drunk and when i had enough drink inside me i might have the guts to go out and face the world in the pubs and then end up causeing trouble and getting barred or what ever and then wake up the next day full of shame wishing i never did it
in the end my drinking progresses to daily drinking and it started because i needed a cure for my hangovers and having a drink the next day would cure my hangover but also it would set of the trigger again for more booze and end up blacked out drunk again
on and on it goes until you lose everything, end up a drunken bum with nothing left
this is what an alcoholic of my type ends up like and i am not the only one
thats just the booze issue i havent even touched on the living life issue sober or how selfish a person i have been all my life
i want things done my way or no way i have never been one to conform to anything i want to change the world to my way
and thats living sober but i never knew any of this about myself until i got honest and looked deep inside me thanks to the program of aa
so for me aa has shown me by the other members experiences that i can now find a name for my illness, i can fit in with these people as there so like me i am no longer alone thinking i am the only one with this problem
i am not a problem drinker nor a person who has a problem with drinking 3 or 5 drinks daily i dont do drugs i dont mix drink with drugs
i just take a drink and i can not stop it nor control it once its in my system
i am an alcoholic i have no control over alcohol and i needed to fully accept that if i was ever going to have a chance of changing
but that just for me
people can call themselves whatever they want but i do see many people who i dont think are alcoholics but people who have a drink problem try to understand what alcoholics is all about and if there not an alcoholic there never going to understand it
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
I'm ok with the term alcoholic, some have a problem with it and others don't, nothing complicated about that. I just never liked the term "Real Alcoholic", I understand its meaning in AA but I have seen some twist it out of context to imply that those who recover on their own were never real alcoholics.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
I think the term alcoholic is used to describe people with diverse sets of problems that have a common denominator - the inability to moderate the intake of alcohol.
Alcoholic doesn't define me as a person. I'm also a friend, a parent, a spouse, a coworker. Those terms describe a diverse set of behaviors too.
I didn't like the label at first, but in recovery it's grown on me, and me into it.
Alcoholic doesn't define me as a person. I'm also a friend, a parent, a spouse, a coworker. Those terms describe a diverse set of behaviors too.
I didn't like the label at first, but in recovery it's grown on me, and me into it.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
I like to say "I no longer suffer from alcoholism".
I go on to say that while I still have the body, brain and organs of a chronic alcoholic, I don't experience any suffering as a result of it. I know how to live my life in such a way that alcohol and alcoholism are no longer causing me suffering of any kind.
I can use recovery to not-drink one-arduous-day-at-a-time by using it as an end of drinking program. Or I can make full use of recovery as an end of suffering program.
"In this life - pain is inevitable -suffering is optional".
(old Buddhist saying)
I go on to say that while I still have the body, brain and organs of a chronic alcoholic, I don't experience any suffering as a result of it. I know how to live my life in such a way that alcohol and alcoholism are no longer causing me suffering of any kind.
I can use recovery to not-drink one-arduous-day-at-a-time by using it as an end of drinking program. Or I can make full use of recovery as an end of suffering program.
"In this life - pain is inevitable -suffering is optional".
(old Buddhist saying)
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
"The essence of life is suffering." Buddha.
"The third Noble Truth is the truth of the cessation of dukkha. The term cessation (Pali: nirodha) refers to the cessation of suffering and the causes of suffering.
Majjhima Nikaya 149:9 gives the following description of cessation:
Cessation is the goal of one's practice in the Buddhist tradition. [21] According to the Buddhist point of view, once we have developed a genuine understanding of the causes of suffering, such as craving (tanha) and ignorance (avijja), then we can completely eradicate these causes and thus be free from suffering."
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_...tion_of_dukkha
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,536
Personally, I don't like calling myself an alcoholic. I know I am and don't deny that. When the topic comes up for whatever reason, I'm open and honest about it. However, it is a negative term in my mind. I am soooo much more than an alcoholic. I prefer to use positive terms to describe myself to reinforce them. That probably doesn't make much sense, but it does in my mind.
AND. . . do I ever identify with some on this thread. Whatever is going on in my life becomes my passion. I've gone after a life of wellness with the same passion I used to have for wines. That's how I identify myself, too. I'm a passionate person, and I love anything and everything to do with wellness. People around me know that I'm passionate about wellness so don't even offer me an alcoholic drink. I really love that about my life right now.
AND. . . do I ever identify with some on this thread. Whatever is going on in my life becomes my passion. I've gone after a life of wellness with the same passion I used to have for wines. That's how I identify myself, too. I'm a passionate person, and I love anything and everything to do with wellness. People around me know that I'm passionate about wellness so don't even offer me an alcoholic drink. I really love that about my life right now.
Not the center of the Universe
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Orchard Lake, Michigan
Posts: 974
Originally Posted by Boleo
"In this life - pain is inevitable -suffering is optional".
(old Buddhist saying)
(old Buddhist saying)
- Man In Black aka Dread Pirate Roberts
But yeah, I no longer suffer from alcoholism and that is a great freedom, even though I am still an alcoholic.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
"Life is pain, Highness! Anyone who says differently is selling something." - Man In Black aka Dread Pirate Roberts
The Buddha's first sermon after his Enlightenment centered on the Four Noble Truths, which are the foundation of Buddhism. The truths are:
1. The truth of suffering (dukkha)
2. The truth of the cause of suffering (samudaya)
3. The truth of the end of suffering (nirhodha)
4. The truth of the path that frees us from suffering (magga)
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
