GreenSwimmer

Hi again everyone.

I’m excited, nervous, scared, anxious about rehab in the morning.
Basically, everyone is on board with this, which is a huge blessing.

I shared with some of you in PMs that my husband is currently in jail (we are both fighting addiction, I’ve never been in legal trouble from my issues but he’ll be where he’s at until mid-January). He is very much on board with me doing this also. However, I haven’t been able to talk to him since Monday. He attempted to call me three times yesterday afternoon when I was on the phone with the counselor who was setting me up with rehab. I didn’t want to be rude/seem uninterested to the counselor and figured my husband would call me back yesterday evening. But he did not. The rehab told me yesterday that I could wait to talk to him of course, but they can’t hold my bed for me obviously. I wasn’t planning on putting this off for another day, more like a few hours (going in to rehab in the afternoon vs morning) to give him a chance to call me again.

This is so hard. I’m going no matter what but I do feel I need to at least talk to my husband first and give him a heads up. He’s fragile and he is expecting me to visit him this weekend but obviously that won’t be happening. I am living with his mom (have a great relationship with her, so does he, she’s a huge support to us both) and she did say she would try to talk to him tomorrow (when he calls my cell, leaving it with her). But I want to talk to him myself. I know his words, I can hear his encouragement but I really would like to talk to him one last time before who knows when. And tell him what is going on.

Is this unreasonable for me to request? Don’t know how to approach the subject in the morning.

Mountainmanbob

Best to just relax and go with that. She's got you covered -- what a blessing. Concentrate on your sobriety. Rehab takes 100% attention and effort.

Good luck,
M-Bob

GreenSwimmer

Thank you, M-Bob. Hard to see things from a different/healthy perspective right now. Appreciate your words.

Mountainmanbob

If you would please marvel in this thought.

(If) the two of you stay sober this will be the beginning of a loving and healthy life for you two.

I went though rehab many years ago and over the years have met hundreds who also went through treatment. So very many have put their lives back together and are living a pretty much trouble free life today.

The reason that I mention trouble free is because -- for most including myself it was a war zone out there for it seems that I was always in collision with somebody or something. That is mentioned in the AA big book.

M-Bob

ChloeRose63

I was in rehab. Best thing ever to just concentrate on yourself and your own recovery. It might take a few days to settle in, but, give it an honest go and you will discover just how strong, loving, deserving and wonderful person you are. Your life will change for the better so be open to letting go of alot of past junk and accepting a new way of living. Good Luck! My thoughts are with you. Be positive!

Dee74

I think Bobs advice is sound on this.

I understand you wanting to speak with him yourself but you don't know when a bed will open up again.

D

GreenSwimmer

Very inspiring. I read about couples who make it out on the other side of addiction and walk through recovery together. There have been a couple times where I should’ve been arrested but my husband either “out-shone” me with his behavior and/or he took the brunt for me. I’d like to stay trouble free. And help him stay that way once this jail sentence is behind us.

I used to have a copy of the Big Book, but it got lost in a move a couple years back. I can’t wait to get my hands on another copy soon. Thanks again!!

GreenSwimmer

Many, many thanks Chloe! Feeling so raw right now. I appreciate the support so much!

GreenSwimmer

You’re correct, and yesterday it took every last bit of energy from me to make those calls to get this arranged. I won’t be messing it up. They did say we can write each other, which we already do now. Go snail mail! Ha!

Mandy73

Wishing you and your husband both the best of luck on your recovery!!

ChloeRose63

Once you get settled in and all the paperwork and stuff is done, you will find that there is nothing more to be worried about. The focus will be on you and the rest of the world should be far away. Let all of that go. Concentrate on yourself. Save all your energy for your recovery first. Getting better will begin to generate more energy. But, use it on yourself first or you will find that old ways of thinking will return. Remember that until you take care of yourself you will be no good to help others. Put yourself first.

Culture

Hi GreenSwimmer

Just wanted to add my support to you. I have no experience with rehab myself, but I wanted to wish you all the best.
Thank you for YOUR support yesterday, it helped get me through a very tough day.

tomsteve

if you cant talk with hubby, howz about writing a letter for his mom to read to him?
then you can let that go and focus on recovery?

p.s.
not being able to talk to hubby beforehand is not a good enough reason to miss this oppertunity FOR a lifetime

DreamCatcher17

Could you send him a letter?
This is going to be so great for you, best wishes!

DontRemember

send him a letter and write one for his mother to read to him when he calls.. Focus 100% on yourself for the time being.


edit: Didn't read Tomsteves post. I 2nd that,as usual.