Thoughts on the 12 steps?
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Join Date: Jun 2018
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Thoughts on the 12 steps?
Hey everyone, I'm struggling lately and need to find a different way to get sober. I apologize if this has been discussed before but what are everyone's thoughts on the 12 steps? I know it really works for some and doesn't for others. I've also heard there is a religious aspect to it. I'm not religious at all (no offense to the folks who are) and I'm not sure I can buy into it if they are pushing a religious aspect. I appreciate everyone's feedback. Hope you are all having a great weekend. I'm happy I found this group! =)
-Sunstorm
-Sunstorm
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
It is based on very well founded spiritual principles, I don't think you can really go wrong with them.
It's not religious unless you want it to be.
Have you read the Big Book of AA? The program is written in it. You can go to AA.org and read the whole book.
I think if you are able to quit without it and stay quit, more power to you. It's definitely worth a read regardless. So is the Bible.
If something works for millions of people, there must be something to it, yeah?
It's not religious unless you want it to be.
Have you read the Big Book of AA? The program is written in it. You can go to AA.org and read the whole book.
I think if you are able to quit without it and stay quit, more power to you. It's definitely worth a read regardless. So is the Bible.
If something works for millions of people, there must be something to it, yeah?
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Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 101
2 books
The big book is a good instruction manual on the 12 steps. Going to AA and getting a sponsor can help too. But the big book does put some people off. Russel brand’s “Recovery” is good read as a follow up: a secular look at the 12 steps.
Those 2 books, Regular AA meetings and sponsorship, and counseling were how I worked the steps.
Those 2 books, Regular AA meetings and sponsorship, and counseling were how I worked the steps.
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 32
Hi Sunstorm, cool name. The 12 step program was spiritual for me. It was a process of letting go of all that held me back and blocked me from the spirit of sunlight. I was an aid in accepting all the ugly hurt and pain for what it was. A lie. The steps were a tool for letting go of lies I believed about myself. They set me free. It was an amazing spiritual experience to accept the truth of who I am and accept that I am ok after all. I didn't need the coping crutch of alcohol anymore to try and fit into and cope with the lies I believed from the incoming bombardment of my senses that were filtering through my messed up perceptions. My broken filter. The 12 steps allowed me to see truth and that is very spiritual to me. To accept the genuine is spiritual. To be genuine and real is to be spiritual. I was living a life of hurt and fear. I have been hurt and in fear but to live that way is a lie and there is nothing spiritual about it. I found living in a bottle to be preferable and that is not living. That is existing in death.
If you are looking for liberation from stagnation and death in a bottle and self defeating lies.....that's what the 12 steps are for. Alcohol and drugs are a form of controlling feelings, emotions, reality. Letting go of that control and accepting truth is where the good stuff begins. Where the fake reality of control ends and the genuine reality of freedom begins. There is no need for mind altering drugs when you accept the truth and know it is a good place to be.
If you are looking for liberation from stagnation and death in a bottle and self defeating lies.....that's what the 12 steps are for. Alcohol and drugs are a form of controlling feelings, emotions, reality. Letting go of that control and accepting truth is where the good stuff begins. Where the fake reality of control ends and the genuine reality of freedom begins. There is no need for mind altering drugs when you accept the truth and know it is a good place to be.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Glad you are here.
I'd check out the 12 Step and AA forums on SR.
I am a dedicated AAer - my suggestion is the classic one you will hear: go to meetings, get a sponsor (someone to guide and teach you about the BB/steps) and do the step work to get sober and live in recovery. And, it's not a religious program - it is one that supports the belief in any higher power you can conceive of, that supports your recovery- that there is something bigger than you, than us, that exists to help us.
I'd also suggest that going it alone with just the BB or 12&12 is a harder way to do it- there is "old" language (it was written so many years ago) and such depth that a sponsor, beginners and step meetings....that's where I started.
You can get and stay sober- finally giving AA an honest shot saved my life. There are other programs you can read about on here - IMO and IME, and watching others during my short 29 mo sober, has taught me that action to support my decision (not hope, or such) to be sober is critical.
Best to you.
I'd check out the 12 Step and AA forums on SR.
I am a dedicated AAer - my suggestion is the classic one you will hear: go to meetings, get a sponsor (someone to guide and teach you about the BB/steps) and do the step work to get sober and live in recovery. And, it's not a religious program - it is one that supports the belief in any higher power you can conceive of, that supports your recovery- that there is something bigger than you, than us, that exists to help us.
I'd also suggest that going it alone with just the BB or 12&12 is a harder way to do it- there is "old" language (it was written so many years ago) and such depth that a sponsor, beginners and step meetings....that's where I started.
You can get and stay sober- finally giving AA an honest shot saved my life. There are other programs you can read about on here - IMO and IME, and watching others during my short 29 mo sober, has taught me that action to support my decision (not hope, or such) to be sober is critical.
Best to you.
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
The 12 Steps work very well for me. Religion didn't seem to help me, but through AA, I found something that did.
All I needed to get started was an open mind and a willingness to try the suggestions.
All I needed to get started was an open mind and a willingness to try the suggestions.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
^^that word "willingness" is a critical thing to see in certain steps. Before you are asked to accept anything (a Higher Power) or actually make amends to people - the previous step only asks you to become willing to do those things.
No Dogma Please
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,562
I used 12 Step heavily in my early recovery, and have a deep appreciation for the organization and it’s work. However I tried to work the steps and couldn’t do the whole give myself to a higher power thing. It all was a bit too much like religion and Christianity. I used cognitive techniques, medical intervention , diet and exercise, Sober Recovery, and individual psychotherapy.
That was me, I don’t speak for anyone else. Go to a meeting and get a Big Book, read and listen, and decide if it resonates with you. If not, there are tons of other options for recovery, and this forum is a fantastic resource.
Investigate. I think it’s crucia to make and follow a recovery plan. What the specifics of that plan entail are solely up to you.
That was me, I don’t speak for anyone else. Go to a meeting and get a Big Book, read and listen, and decide if it resonates with you. If not, there are tons of other options for recovery, and this forum is a fantastic resource.
Investigate. I think it’s crucia to make and follow a recovery plan. What the specifics of that plan entail are solely up to you.
Life is good
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4,036
Many paths. No one way. Even within 12-step programs.
One of the things that resonated with me from the beginning was the phrase I heard "take what helps and leave the rest." Whatever I really need comes back to me.
The "Higher Power" thing:
1. Doesn't matter. Many agnostics and atheists in 12 step programs.
2. Matters deeply. Many people of different faith are in 12-step programs.
I've gained great insights on looking for signs from Universe/Higher Power/God/Great Spirit. Now the two points above are blended into one group of people finding recovery on many levels.
One of the things that resonated with me from the beginning was the phrase I heard "take what helps and leave the rest." Whatever I really need comes back to me.
The "Higher Power" thing:
1. Doesn't matter. Many agnostics and atheists in 12 step programs.
2. Matters deeply. Many people of different faith are in 12-step programs.
I've gained great insights on looking for signs from Universe/Higher Power/God/Great Spirit. Now the two points above are blended into one group of people finding recovery on many levels.
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
i never felt there was a "religious" aspect to AA or 12 step recovery. as a former Catholic, AA never felt churchy or preachy.
a lot of folks get hung up on the Power Greater element. i never quite got that as in my experience i let alcohol and drugs BE my higher power...guiding me, directing my life, telling me what to do. so surely, ANYTHING else that was not about using and losing HAD to be better!
a lot of folks get hung up on the Power Greater element. i never quite got that as in my experience i let alcohol and drugs BE my higher power...guiding me, directing my life, telling me what to do. so surely, ANYTHING else that was not about using and losing HAD to be better!
No Dogma Please
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,562
I couldn't get past Step 1. "Came to believe that a Higher Power could restore me to sanity" is Step 2. Kind of a core part of the steps.
Tried to work it, just felt false to me. Did other stuff instead.
To me it's faith. Call it God or a higher power, it's faith. I don't do faith well.
I took the community, but the steps themselves didn't work for me.
Tried to work it, just felt false to me. Did other stuff instead.
To me it's faith. Call it God or a higher power, it's faith. I don't do faith well.
I took the community, but the steps themselves didn't work for me.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 1,074
Im not religious and the 12 steps work for me Its more a spiritual programme, whereby you find something bigger and higher than yourself. This could be anyone, God, Allah, The moon, The universe, a loved one in heaven, the power of the rooms, Angels or even Elvis bloomin Presley! Fact is, it doesnt matter who or whag your higher power is, all you need is to find something greater than yourself x Many people struggle with this concept, some people do not even know who or what their high power is, all they know is that there is something. Still works x
Its more a spiritual programme, whereby you find something bigger and higher than yourself. This could be anyone, God, Allah, The moon, The universe, a loved one in heaven, the power of the rooms, Angels or even Elvis bloomin Presley! Fact is, it doesnt matter who or whag your higher power is, all you need is to find something greater than yourself x Many people struggle with this concept, some people do not even know who or what their high power is, all they know is that there is something. Still works x
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 1,068
FYI - My AA sponsor is an Atheist. That said I do see a lot of God/religion type sharing in some AA meetings.
I can't say if AA will work best for an particular individual but I do believe most of us need to make some permanent behavior changes in order to get alcohol out of our lives. So if AA isn't for you then I suggest that you search for a solution/program that works for you. Many folks I have met just seem to give up on a using any program if AA does not work for them and IMO that's a recipe for failure. I hope you find what you are looking for.
I can't say if AA will work best for an particular individual but I do believe most of us need to make some permanent behavior changes in order to get alcohol out of our lives. So if AA isn't for you then I suggest that you search for a solution/program that works for you. Many folks I have met just seem to give up on a using any program if AA does not work for them and IMO that's a recipe for failure. I hope you find what you are looking for.
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