Jo S

It is good to write that "I hate my parents". I could use the stronger word "resent" i suppose! I strongly hope my two boys (one 18 months and one 6 weeks) don't grow up as damged as i have? Although i wasn't really physically abused as a child the emotional stuff still goes on today and what is worse is that i let it. Why? I just feel powerless and possibly feeling this enables them to treat me like a piece of ****. My mum is an avid bully and my dad is very negative in his outlook - all doom and gloom! I feel i haven't had it easy and sometimes i despair. Why oh why do i have to come from quite such a dysfuncional family who care far more "what people think" than "what really matters". What is worse is that i have myself for hating them and MY own f****** family suffers.

I feel a whole lot better now that i have got that off my chest.

Please Lord help me to learn to forgive.x

HPierce

hang in there hun trust in your higher power... he will take care of you!! maybe you should pray for them. the power of prayer really works!!

wantneeda

hugs to...keep letting your feelings out!!!! your parents have your power...take it back!!!
hugs and hugs, Wendy

FriendofBill

sorry for your obvioust frustration. My question to you would be" Now what are you going to do about these feelings?

Yes, youve been dealt a hand of poop, but you dont have to stay in the sh!t if you dont choose.

Therapy
12 steps

this is what worked for me,,,good luck!

Anna

Hi Jo,

My growing up situation sounds similar and I had a lot of resentment too. It's one thing to understand intellectually what you need to do and another to be able to do it. Keep working on forgiveness, for your sake. It's the only way to enable you to move on. And, you will be a better parent for your children that your parents were for you.

Love, Anna

spirit

jo s

you sound like you have lovely bubs, congratulations.

i am an old girl and for many years i resented what my folks did and did not do. however havin had my own bubs, i found the hardest thing was being a mu to them without going to MY folks for help, no matter all the wrongs i had thought they had done.

so i tried my own ways, battled against their advice when appropriate, to raise my own.

two odd things have happened

a) some of the crap things i thought my folks said or did where right for me
b) my kids have said i am a crap parent hahahhaha

so hon, just do what you can, there is no magic formula, just be honest to yourself and your bubs.

hugs to you
kath

Chy

*hugs* I can only say this, no one, and I mean no one has that much power over us to make us feel so terrible. Once your realize this you will heal.

jbm125

Hi Jo....1st thing you can do is stop feeling sorry for yourself. We can't pick our parents but we can pick how to deal with them. Some people get toxic parents(I did)
and deal with the situation by being self sufficient as soon as they can. Not by getting and staying high. It don't work, it don't help and it don't change them.
'Mum is a bully and Dad is negative'. You are a member of a big club. Join the winners and leave the losers behind. God bless.

Jo S

JBM i25 Thank you for your comment.