Day 1 again
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,477
Hi AJ
I'm sorry you drank but I'm glad you came right back here.
Many of us faltered a time or two before we got the no drinking ever thing right....but I think it's important to examine what happened and why you drank.
That way you can build a better plan going forward?
D
I'm sorry you drank but I'm glad you came right back here.
Many of us faltered a time or two before we got the no drinking ever thing right....but I think it's important to examine what happened and why you drank.
That way you can build a better plan going forward?
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Hi AJ
I'm sorry you drank but I'm glad you came right back here.
Many of us faltered a time or two before we got the no drinking ever thing right....but I think it's important to examine what happened and why you drank.
That way you can build a better plan going forward?
D
I'm sorry you drank but I'm glad you came right back here.
Many of us faltered a time or two before we got the no drinking ever thing right....but I think it's important to examine what happened and why you drank.
That way you can build a better plan going forward?
D
pretty annoyed with myself
I am a Child of God
Join Date: Aug 2022
Posts: 54
I am sorry you drank but new day new start pick yourself up dust yourself off and make this day count, just this day only just this day don't think of yesterday or tomorrow , do something nice for yourself , anything without the drink or drugs something you have not done in a long time , keep your self distracted and be kind to yourself
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,477
Think about other ways you could relieve stress and other ways to relax when you're not at home maybe?
Remember you can access SR anytime you have a internet device handy - phone, table, PC macbook.
Post before you drink.
I know it might be inconvenient to log in sometimes but we're all worth that effort, and so is your recovery
D
Remember you can access SR anytime you have a internet device handy - phone, table, PC macbook.
Post before you drink.
I know it might be inconvenient to log in sometimes but we're all worth that effort, and so is your recovery
D
Member
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 12,514
AJ, I have definitely been where you were/are and drank due to stress and for me it only made things worse on many levels and the stress was still there. Blah. I am so very happy you are back, I too have had a handful of day 1s, so I know and understand how hard it is (along with many members here I am sure) and how you feel. Now when I feel like "need" a I run that tape forward and backward of what happens when I drink. I also think about what the people here would say to me which really helps. Hang in there, you can do this.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
What helped me from day 1 until now to not relapse is believing the following...
Booze altered my brain permanently. There are connections that are forever damaged.
The connections were damaged by booze and now need the booze to feel "normal." The anxious/obsessive/insane etc. feelings I got from day 1 until now are those connections dealing with the lack of booze.
This is the suffering some have spoken about. Getting through the suffering, the crave, is hell on earth.
The emotional response is defeated by the analysis. This is the left and right brain battling. This makes me feel crazy.
The only way I know to get through is suffering and time. It can take years to readjust and feel better. Relapse looms the whole time.
The good news is that beginning on day 1, there are moments of clarity/serenity. These moments get longer and longer. The suffering gets shorter and shorter.
Enjoying exercise, good food, entertainment, acts of kindness, AA meetings, etc. etc. all defeat the crave.
I drank anytime anywhere, so the crave can come always. My big crave is around 2 to 5 pm on Friday. That was party time.
Prescription meds help, I hear, but now I risk relapsing while on meds. They tell me that is deeper level of hell on earth because meds are scientifically designed and have ridiculous half life numbers blah blah.
Thanks.
Booze altered my brain permanently. There are connections that are forever damaged.
The connections were damaged by booze and now need the booze to feel "normal." The anxious/obsessive/insane etc. feelings I got from day 1 until now are those connections dealing with the lack of booze.
This is the suffering some have spoken about. Getting through the suffering, the crave, is hell on earth.
The emotional response is defeated by the analysis. This is the left and right brain battling. This makes me feel crazy.
The only way I know to get through is suffering and time. It can take years to readjust and feel better. Relapse looms the whole time.
The good news is that beginning on day 1, there are moments of clarity/serenity. These moments get longer and longer. The suffering gets shorter and shorter.
Enjoying exercise, good food, entertainment, acts of kindness, AA meetings, etc. etc. all defeat the crave.
I drank anytime anywhere, so the crave can come always. My big crave is around 2 to 5 pm on Friday. That was party time.
Prescription meds help, I hear, but now I risk relapsing while on meds. They tell me that is deeper level of hell on earth because meds are scientifically designed and have ridiculous half life numbers blah blah.
Thanks.
Sober Soldier
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 1,911
The important thing is you came right back AJ. You keep trying. Like others, I've been in this position many times myself. Things didn't change until I radically rethought my mindset around recovery.
For me, I fully accept and expect to find myself in situations and settings that are going to bring my AV roaring to the surface. I also expect that there are going to be random moments -- triggered by who-knows-what -- where my AV will just pop up out of nowhere. Unless I trap myself in a bubble, these things will happen. This mindset of acceptance and expectation sets me up so that these situations don't catch me off guard, and I can respond and deal with them in a way that doesn't end drinking.
Travel and most certainly stress are two things that will come up again. How will you be ready to protect your sobriety when they do?
For me, I fully accept and expect to find myself in situations and settings that are going to bring my AV roaring to the surface. I also expect that there are going to be random moments -- triggered by who-knows-what -- where my AV will just pop up out of nowhere. Unless I trap myself in a bubble, these things will happen. This mindset of acceptance and expectation sets me up so that these situations don't catch me off guard, and I can respond and deal with them in a way that doesn't end drinking.
Travel and most certainly stress are two things that will come up again. How will you be ready to protect your sobriety when they do?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Lily76
I am sorry you drank but new day new start pick yourself up dust yourself off and make this day count, just this day only just this day don't think of yesterday or tomorrow , do something nice for yourself , anything without the drink or drugs something you have not done in a long time , keep your self distracted and be kind to yourself
Thank you. I am so hard on myself... I did not drink today. In fact I was really productive given it was day 1 again. Thank you for reminding me to be kind to myself.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Dee74
Think about other ways you could relieve stress and other ways to relax when you're not at home maybe?
Remember you can access SR anytime you have a internet device handy - phone, table, PC macbook.
Post before you drink.
I know it might be inconvenient to log in sometimes but we're all worth that effort, and so is your recovery
D
Remember you can access SR anytime you have a internet device handy - phone, table, PC macbook.
Post before you drink.
I know it might be inconvenient to log in sometimes but we're all worth that effort, and so is your recovery
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Bobbieka
Glad you're here, AJ. It's easy to think it will be no big deal. Until we realize it is a big deal. Hope today is better for you. You can do this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Anna
I'm sorry to hear this, AJ.
As others have said, come up with some healthy things you can do when stressed.
As others have said, come up with some healthy things you can do when stressed.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by mns1
The important thing is you came right back AJ. You keep trying. Like others, I've been in this position many times myself. Things didn't change until I radically rethought my mindset around recovery.
For me, I fully accept and expect to find myself in situations and settings that are going to bring my AV roaring to the surface. I also expect that there are going to be random moments -- triggered by who-knows-what -- where my AV will just pop up out of nowhere. Unless I trap myself in a bubble, these things will happen. This mindset of acceptance and expectation sets me up so that these situations don't catch me off guard, and I can respond and deal with them in a way that doesn't end drinking.
Travel and most certainly stress are two things that will come up again. How will you be ready to protect your sobriety when they do?
For me, I fully accept and expect to find myself in situations and settings that are going to bring my AV roaring to the surface. I also expect that there are going to be random moments -- triggered by who-knows-what -- where my AV will just pop up out of nowhere. Unless I trap myself in a bubble, these things will happen. This mindset of acceptance and expectation sets me up so that these situations don't catch me off guard, and I can respond and deal with them in a way that doesn't end drinking.
Travel and most certainly stress are two things that will come up again. How will you be ready to protect your sobriety when they do?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by D122y
What helped me from day 1 until now to not relapse is believing the following...
Booze altered my brain permanently. There are connections that are forever damaged.
The connections were damaged by booze and now need the booze to feel "normal." The anxious/obsessive/insane etc. feelings I got from day 1 until now are those connections dealing with the lack of booze.
Thank you I didn't drink today so day 1 is done
This is the suffering some have spoken about. Getting through the suffering, the crave, is hell on earth.
The emotional response is defeated by the analysis. This is the left and right brain battling. This makes me feel crazy.
The only way I know to get through is suffering and time. It can take years to readjust and feel better. Relapse looms the whole time.
The good news is that beginning on day 1, there are moments of clarity/serenity. These moments get longer and longer. The suffering gets shorter and shorter.
Enjoying exercise, good food, entertainment, acts of kindness, AA meetings, etc. etc. all defeat the crave.
I drank anytime anywhere, so the crave can come always. My big crave is around 2 to 5 pm on Friday. That was party time.
Prescription meds help, I hear, but now I risk relapsing while on meds. They tell me that is deeper level of hell on earth because meds are scientifically designed and have ridiculous half life numbers blah blah.
Thanks.
Booze altered my brain permanently. There are connections that are forever damaged.
The connections were damaged by booze and now need the booze to feel "normal." The anxious/obsessive/insane etc. feelings I got from day 1 until now are those connections dealing with the lack of booze.
Thank you
I didn't drink today so day 1 is doneThis is the suffering some have spoken about. Getting through the suffering, the crave, is hell on earth.
The emotional response is defeated by the analysis. This is the left and right brain battling. This makes me feel crazy.
The only way I know to get through is suffering and time. It can take years to readjust and feel better. Relapse looms the whole time.
The good news is that beginning on day 1, there are moments of clarity/serenity. These moments get longer and longer. The suffering gets shorter and shorter.
Enjoying exercise, good food, entertainment, acts of kindness, AA meetings, etc. etc. all defeat the crave.
I drank anytime anywhere, so the crave can come always. My big crave is around 2 to 5 pm on Friday. That was party time.
Prescription meds help, I hear, but now I risk relapsing while on meds. They tell me that is deeper level of hell on earth because meds are scientifically designed and have ridiculous half life numbers blah blah.
Thanks.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Alpine
AJ, I have definitely been where you were/are and drank due to stress and for me it only made things worse on many levels and the stress was still there. Blah. I am so very happy you are back, I too have had a handful of day 1s, so I know and understand how hard it is (along with many members here I am sure) and how you feel. Now when I feel like "need" a I run that tape forward and backward of what happens when I drink. I also think about what the people here would say to me which really helps. Hang in there, you can do this.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 4,428
AJ, congrats on not drinking today.
Glad you made it back so quickly, the slope gets slippery so fast once you pick up. Keep going and add some more tools to your sober arsenal!
Day two- here you come!
Glad you made it back so quickly, the slope gets slippery so fast once you pick up. Keep going and add some more tools to your sober arsenal!
Day two- here you come!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by VikingGF
AJ, congrats on not drinking today.
Glad you made it back so quickly, the slope gets slippery so fast once you pick up. Keep going and add some more tools to your sober arsenal!
Day two- here you come!
Glad you made it back so quickly, the slope gets slippery so fast once you pick up. Keep going and add some more tools to your sober arsenal!
Day two- here you come!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 4,428
The sadness will pass, AJ. You can take all the negative emotion from this relapse and turn it into gratitude that you don’t have the desire to drink. Use these feelings to your advantage, recall them if you must so you remember how much you wished you hadn’t drank if the urge comes again. It’s all a learning experience to help you from ever needing to have another day 1. You’re doing great.
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