LovelyKaya33333

Hi guys I know that this is not alanon related or related in anyway to Friends and Family of Alcoholics but I had to strangest and one of the hardest days of my life today and i just needed to share.

For the last few 2 years I had been working out very hard and eating all the right foods ect... When I hit 35 I couldn't stop gaining weight... I am sure being married to an alcoholic and the stress involved in that and owning a wedding planning company were huge factors in that but after my exAH left 7 months ago I was so into cross fit and getting in really good shape. Like so into it. I still could not lose belly weight... no matter what so I scheduled a few consultations for body contouring ( similar to liposuction ) and landed on a surgeon I was happy with. My father agreed to cosign on the loan and I was set. I did all my preops, worked 70 hour work weeks for like 6 weeks in a row to make sure that I covered all my basis in regards of getting my clients needs met and all business orders wrapped up before. I had my house deep cleaned ( cause I would be recovering there ) ... My father was picking me up from surgery and taking care of me my first day... Heck I even had my cats food out in portions for my room mate to feed her the first night I was gone.. I even stocked the fridge with healthy but simple foods so my tummy could handled the nausea that might happen ....Surgery was set for today ...anyhow here is my day

Wake up at 7 am : Can't have water or food ( surgery not set until 2pm) .... get through that sooo thirsty....
2pm: Show up at the doctors office
2:10pm: They take me back. on our way they ask me to pee in a cup so I do
2:15pm: I get in the gown and sign all the waivers
2:20pm: The nurse comes in and says so I have some news..." You are pregnant" WTF! I am like huh... you sure... we take another test and it lights up immidiately like a xmas tree....
Now I know how babies are made but I just got off my period the day before and while I had been having a casual thing ( think once a month) with someone I was not expecting this especially since i just had my period
2:30pm: I call my dad and tell him .... I was in shock but he was planning on picking me up 4 hours later from surgery so I had to tell him
2:30-7pm: At my parents house... start to come to terms with this idea....
Then I start thinking well if I am pregnant why did I just bleed for 4 days ... my mind gets the best of me so I go to the hospital
After 5 hours there and 2 ultra sounds (internal and external) and blood work. It is confirmed I was pregnant but the bleeding the day prior was actually a miscarriage and not a period....

I just walked in the door from the hospital.... I am feeling so many different things... I feel like I am not even connected to my body ...like I am in a dream or something... Just so much in one day...

My sister said she had a really bad feeling about my surgery and thinks that this is divine intervention... and while a part of me agrees logically this day has been devestating on so many levels... I feel numb... I just needed to share... I feel like I am in lala land... I just can't beleive this happened .... all of it.. the whole story... I am numb

ironwill

Hi LK,

I'm sorry for the wild day you had. Know we are here for you no matter what the situation. Keep being strong.

Bethany57

Wow....I am so sorry for your loss. I have read your threads and you are such a strong woman. You will get through this. You can do hard things. Best to you.

Triggered

Hi LK,

Wow... that's some major mind fk right there. I'm so sorry for your situation and sending hugs and healing vibes your way. In situations like this it seems futile to offer condolences but just know (as Im sure all here would agree), we are all here for you when you need us.

A few observations if I may. It's telling about your strength and resilience that not only have you decided to post but you have posted so coherently and with a measured temperament. I'm quite sure that your mind is far from ordered right now but it's apparent that your strength of character has allowed you to be reasoned in approach to this unimaginably difficult situation. That strength of character will carry you through this terrible time even if you dont realise it right now. Feeling numb after a situation like this is just your mind telling you to pause while you process the sequence of events. Listen to the solutions your mind is providing. In situations like this your instinct is rarely wrong.

I'm sure that given your initial reaction that you'll be able to come to terms with this eventually. Obviously it will take time to process, in the meantime all the love and support that you need is in the people who love you and are nearest to you.... and also from those here who are no further than a click away.

dandylion

Kaya.......I will add a word to what the others have offered.
I suggest that you see an ob/gyn doctor right away---in addition to your regular doctors, of course. I worked for several years in a woman's hospital, and your particular situation was not unusual. Not the most common, but certainly not rare and happens more than most people realize. Ob/gyns are very familiar with this, and will prepare you for how to process this and how to care for yourself.
****You may note that your body's hormones will be going through some rapid changes and you will need to be aware of this fact---so that you won't be caught off guard.

I am sorry that you have h it this surprising bump in the road.

sage1969

What a situation. I'm thankful for you that your health is what it is so that your body is getting through this in the way it is, and that your home is ready for you to spend some time resting, and that your clients are set up for what they need for a bit. It isn't the recuperation for which you'd planned, but now you have it. I'm hoping you have the space and time to be kind to yourself while you're healing, and that you rely on your support system when you need it.

trailmix

What a day indeed! I'm so sorry you went through all that, that is mind numbing. You are probably exhausted and I'm also glad you have everything set up for a few days off to look after yourself, you need rest, please take it.

This will all come right, after you get over the shock. Once you have slept well you will feel much better. You can rebook your surgery for a later date, so that's no problem.

Take good care of yourself.

Payne9

Just wanted to say you’re so strong to post as you did. I’ve actually been in a similar situation in my life. Message me if you need! Lots of emotions ! Hugs

LovelyKaya33333

Hi everyone thank you so much for all your support I only slept for like 3 hours but I woke up ...got some coffee in me and decided to go see a nutritionist/weight loss consultant. I was there for 2 hours and got a full read on exactly how many calories I can eat to maintain/lose... ect ect ect .... So it turns out I only burn $1,326 calories resting a day which is lower then I thought ... granted I workout everyday but it all makes more sense now. I am on a program now where I will be doing shots to boost my metabolism and a very high protein strict diet....I will be seeing her once a week for 6 weeks... I have a guy friend who had seen her in the past and lost 30 lbs in 6 weeks so I am excited for that. I know tonight I will probably crash but actively doing something today to keep moving forward in the goals I had set for myself was helpful... Thank you everyone for your unwavering love and support

Bekindalways

That sure is a twist that life threw you: all in one fell swoop you find out your are pregnant and have miscarried. Wierdness abounds in life

Let us know how you get on LK.