Thinking about it
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 280
Thinking about it
Almost 6 months sober at the end of the month.
I thought the cravings would have passed by now but they’re still lurking.
in the past 2 months I’ve had fleeting thoughts of drinking. Easily dismissed. For the past week the thought has been getting stronger and more persistent though. I know I don’t want to drink.
bug another part of me just wants to do it. I keep thinking I could just start all over again. But I know how horrible the morning after will be. And that keeps me going for now.
crazy.
needed to put this out there. I need to weather these crazy feelings.
hopefully I’ll wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind!
have a good weekend!
I thought the cravings would have passed by now but they’re still lurking.
in the past 2 months I’ve had fleeting thoughts of drinking. Easily dismissed. For the past week the thought has been getting stronger and more persistent though. I know I don’t want to drink.
bug another part of me just wants to do it. I keep thinking I could just start all over again. But I know how horrible the morning after will be. And that keeps me going for now.
crazy.
needed to put this out there. I need to weather these crazy feelings.
hopefully I’ll wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind!
have a good weekend!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Poole, Dorset
Posts: 533
Firstly, congratulations on 6 months! That's awesome!
I sometimes wonder whether these cravings themselves are really for the drink itself or the habit of that we've so deeply ingrained over the years, I'm 4 months in and I am still entertaining thoughts of the possibility of drinking but when I think about the taste and the effect I realise I don't really want to at all. It's as though on some level I'm trying to convince myself that I do want to - Is it anything like that?
Either way, keep reminding yourself of the end game when you do drink, be constructive, write a list pros (perceived no doubt - certainly in my case haha) and cons and I can bet the cons out weigh the pros - then congratulate yourself on already achieving 6 months of freedom and many more that you get to enjoy.
Post post post if you're struggling - we're all here for you if you need us
Love Billy x
I sometimes wonder whether these cravings themselves are really for the drink itself or the habit of that we've so deeply ingrained over the years, I'm 4 months in and I am still entertaining thoughts of the possibility of drinking but when I think about the taste and the effect I realise I don't really want to at all. It's as though on some level I'm trying to convince myself that I do want to - Is it anything like that?
Either way, keep reminding yourself of the end game when you do drink, be constructive, write a list pros (perceived no doubt - certainly in my case haha) and cons and I can bet the cons out weigh the pros - then congratulate yourself on already achieving 6 months of freedom and many more that you get to enjoy.
Post post post if you're struggling - we're all here for you if you need us
Love Billy x
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,944
Hi Clark, you are a superman if you’ve got six months under your belt. You say the cravings are still there, but are they really as intense as week one?
I’m nearly 18 months sober and get cravings, especially in this weather and the crazy times we’re temporarily in. Like you, I don’t miss the hangovers and lethargy.
You know from reading on here and elsewhere that there aren’t any success stories from people drinking again. It always ends in heavy drinking within weeks.
I must admit I’m curious about drinking again at times, but I’m not sure what I’d achieve doing so. I’m very scared that some dormant chemical in my brain will be woken by any alcohol and causing mad cravings. I’ll leave that to the imagination as things have got better and better since I quit. They will for you too.
I’m nearly 18 months sober and get cravings, especially in this weather and the crazy times we’re temporarily in. Like you, I don’t miss the hangovers and lethargy.
You know from reading on here and elsewhere that there aren’t any success stories from people drinking again. It always ends in heavy drinking within weeks.
I must admit I’m curious about drinking again at times, but I’m not sure what I’d achieve doing so. I’m very scared that some dormant chemical in my brain will be woken by any alcohol and causing mad cravings. I’ll leave that to the imagination as things have got better and better since I quit. They will for you too.
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
When I was right where you are at, 180 days sober, I recall thinking, "What if I drank once every six months...twice a year. That's a lot better than every day."
Twice a year? Yeah, right. That's the lie that the addiction tells to get you to open the door. If I could have convinced myself that twice a year was okay, then why not four times a year, or once a month, or once a week....
That's the insanity of alcoholism. Better to stay sober than entertain the idea that you should drink.
Twice a year? Yeah, right. That's the lie that the addiction tells to get you to open the door. If I could have convinced myself that twice a year was okay, then why not four times a year, or once a month, or once a week....
That's the insanity of alcoholism. Better to stay sober than entertain the idea that you should drink.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
You are doing great ClarkK. And it isn't the morning after you decide to drink that you should dread. It is the 400th morning after drinking for the next 400 days that should be feared. It is never just one lone day. Otherwise we'd all be definitely doing that here and there. It simply isn't how that works for us.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Out in the Stix of Southern Indiana
Posts: 2,784
Sometimes I briefly think about drinking. It's strange how the AV has partial recall when it comes to how drinking makes you feel. I remember the haunting thoughts of what time, what am I going to drink today, where at, how much? Every day over and over. And it would always end up the same way. Passed out in the garage or in front of the television. As soon as I ate something it was over. Nighty night. Like flipping a switch. Then when I woke up, that's another story. Dehydrated to the MAX! At the time I really didn't think that much about it cause it happened every day for years and years. I can't express how grateful I am that I dont have to do that anymore! Hopefully never again! Best wishes for you on your journey!
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,944
Originally Posted by doggonecarl 
why not four times a year, or once a month, or once a week.....
Cravings really do last seconds or at a push minutes, but the consequence of giving in last for years.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 1,469
Originally Posted by clarkkent11
Almost 6 months sober at the end of the month.
I thought the cravings would have passed by now but they’re still lurking.
in the past 2 months I’ve had fleeting thoughts of drinking. Easily dismissed. For the past week the thought has been getting stronger and more persistent though. I know I don’t want to drink.
bug another part of me just wants to do it. I keep thinking I could just start all over again. But I know how horrible the morning after will be. And that keeps me going for now.
crazy.
needed to put this out there. I need to weather these crazy feelings.
hopefully I’ll wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind!
have a good weekend!
I thought the cravings would have passed by now but they’re still lurking.
in the past 2 months I’ve had fleeting thoughts of drinking. Easily dismissed. For the past week the thought has been getting stronger and more persistent though. I know I don’t want to drink.
bug another part of me just wants to do it. I keep thinking I could just start all over again. But I know how horrible the morning after will be. And that keeps me going for now.
crazy.
needed to put this out there. I need to weather these crazy feelings.
hopefully I’ll wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind!
have a good weekend!
Blessings to you,
DC
Coffee Snob
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Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 808
Originally Posted by doggonecarl
When I was right where you are at, 180 days sober, I recall thinking, "What if I drank once every six months...twice a year. That's a lot better than every day."
Twice a year? Yeah, right. That's the lie that the addiction tells to get you to open the door. If I could have convinced myself that twice a year was okay, then why not four times a year, or once a month, or once a week....
That's the insanity of alcoholism. Better to stay sober than entertain the idea that you should drink.
Twice a year? Yeah, right. That's the lie that the addiction tells to get you to open the door. If I could have convinced myself that twice a year was okay, then why not four times a year, or once a month, or once a week....
That's the insanity of alcoholism. Better to stay sober than entertain the idea that you should drink.
Pretty much exactly what happened with me at 6 months. I started questioning if I really was an alcoholic or not. I started to think I was just overreacting (LOL, right). It was like an avalanche of rapid thoughts that didn't turn off. Don't do what I did. I gave in. Then it got really bad. I was right back to my old routine in no time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 280
Thanks everyone. I’m safe tonight. About to go to bed. Where I live everything is now reopening. Seeing people in restaurants and pubs is triggering I think.
I was stronger when everyone was forced to stay home. I recently passed by some guys who were smoking and that smell .. what a trigger. I used to smoke when I drank. Quit smoking for almost 6 months now too.
just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
good night!
I was stronger when everyone was forced to stay home. I recently passed by some guys who were smoking and that smell .. what a trigger. I used to smoke when I drank. Quit smoking for almost 6 months now too.
just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
good night!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2020
Location: Eastern US
Posts: 1,386
Dee or Anna (or anyone that may remember), are there past threads about common milestones where people experience problems with their sobriety? I know on WQD forums there was a thread or 2 that we would bump in situations like this that had a good list of common times when people had cravings and how to deal.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,934
Where I live everything is now reopening. Seeing people in restaurants and pubs is triggering I think.
Visit the CNN website and check out what is happening in Arizona, California, Florida and Texas. The daily Coronavirus infections are at an all time high. That might cure your desire to visit a bar or restaurant.
And my state, which had turned the corner and was doing well, is now increasing due to idiots not using face masks and not social distancing at all. Stay home.
Visit the CNN website and check out what is happening in Arizona, California, Florida and Texas. The daily Coronavirus infections are at an all time high. That might cure your desire to visit a bar or restaurant.
And my state, which had turned the corner and was doing well, is now increasing due to idiots not using face masks and not social distancing at all. Stay home.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
At exactly where you are right now I had my last actual battle with the AV. I've also read lots of others having this same intense battle. I'm now at over six years, and the whimper of the AV is super impotent.
Six months is huge.
But the next big hurdle is a Year!
What I did? I would quietly list all the usernames I could think of in my head and remind myself that every one of those alcoholics understood and Every One of them would tell me not to do it!
You'll make it. Just keep doing the next right thing.
Six months is huge.
But the next big hurdle is a Year!
What I did? I would quietly list all the usernames I could think of in my head and remind myself that every one of those alcoholics understood and Every One of them would tell me not to do it!
You'll make it. Just keep doing the next right thing.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 2,409
I would argue that certainly from my experience it’s possible for the desire for alcohol to be completely removed ergo no cravings. This is possible in my experience by a thorough recovery process whereby all underlying issues are dealt with and in my case one lives spiritually which fills the void that alcohol filled. The 12 steps can be undertaken and lived to reach this point. Daily maintenance by connecting with recovery and living the principles of the 12 steps maintain this state of recovery in my experience.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
Firstly congrats and good for you for coming here to share these thoughts about drinking. I think you need to strengthen and fortify your resolve, to look at and remind yourself all the reasons that you are here and sober. I went back and read your first thread here, from more than 5 years ago - we are the exact same age and I too wasted so many of my years drunk. I think you are right to be concerned that your mind is even entertaining ideas of picking up again. Permanent sobriety is something that you need to accept and embrace deep down and for good. What can you do to accomplish this?
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Originally Posted by clarkkent11
Almost 6 months sober at the end of the month.
I thought the cravings would have passed by now but they’re still lurking.
in the past 2 months I’ve had fleeting thoughts of drinking. Easily dismissed. For the past week the thought has been getting stronger and more persistent though. I know I don’t want to drink.
bug another part of me just wants to do it. I keep thinking I could just start all over again. But I know how horrible the morning after will be. And that keeps me going for now.
crazy.
needed to put this out there. I need to weather these crazy feelings.
hopefully I’ll wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind!
have a good weekend!
I thought the cravings would have passed by now but they’re still lurking.
in the past 2 months I’ve had fleeting thoughts of drinking. Easily dismissed. For the past week the thought has been getting stronger and more persistent though. I know I don’t want to drink.
bug another part of me just wants to do it. I keep thinking I could just start all over again. But I know how horrible the morning after will be. And that keeps me going for now.
crazy.
needed to put this out there. I need to weather these crazy feelings.
hopefully I’ll wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind!
have a good weekend!
I do not believe alcoholism ever goes away.
Rather than depressing me, that though gives me cheer because my alcolism no longer bothers me at all. It gives me cheer because I’m living an awesome sober life and it’s the best life I‘ve lived.
As long as I don’t feed it, alcoholism remains dead & in my past.
The idea that you could just start again is a pervasive one from the AV but I’ve known people who literally died thinking that way.
The stakes are that high, Clark.
Make a good choice
Originally Posted by MaximusD
Dee or Anna (or anyone that may remember), are there past threads about common milestones where people experience problems with their sobriety? I know on WQD forums there was a thread or 2 that we would bump in situations like this that had a good list of common times when people had cravings and how to deal.
D
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