Seriously??
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 21
Seriously??
My AH is on the fast train to nowhere good. I am working with a DV advocate to get myself and my boys safely out of state.
yesterday AH comes home early with "presents"... Something I have wanted for a very long time... But, he was blasted. I didn't realize it until I had gone on for ten minutes about how much I loved my gift. Now, I hate it. I only want to destroy it. Ugh. My ulcer is back and I am losing weight again. Looking like the second week of June will be our "disappear" date. It cannot come soon enough.
yesterday AH comes home early with "presents"... Something I have wanted for a very long time... But, he was blasted. I didn't realize it until I had gone on for ten minutes about how much I loved my gift. Now, I hate it. I only want to destroy it. Ugh. My ulcer is back and I am losing weight again. Looking like the second week of June will be our "disappear" date. It cannot come soon enough.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
as the old proverb goes - Beware of Greeks bearing gifts!
is it returnable? use it then to fund your escape plan.
sorry he pulled the ole bait and switch there. but not surprised.
stay quiet and stay safe!
is it returnable? use it then to fund your escape plan.
sorry he pulled the ole bait and switch there. but not surprised.
stay quiet and stay safe!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 21
As part of the escape plan, I have been instructed to keep quiet and maintain a safe space until all of my paperwork can be filed. My apologies for thinking I could come here and be understood. If I could figure out how to delete posts I would. You have beaten me. Thanks to those who understood.... I'm done. This is not a safe place for me apparently.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Pa
Posts: 4,872
I understood everything that you wrote. I was in that situation, or perhaps might have surpassed your situation. I got gifts all the time. Expensive gifts. Tiffany jewelry or Waterford vases. I loved them, I appreciated them, who wouldn't.
One time my now ex bought me a Waterford hummingbird. I was ecstatic over it. I thought he put so much though into this gift. I thought that he was actually thing about me and things I wanted, and things that I loved. No, that wasn't true. I thought about that Waterford hummingbird after hearing some disparaging words to me, and I went for a drive with that hummingbird. I was going to throw it in the river, it meant nothing to me, it was just another way to try to buy me. I didn't throw it in the river, I told him I did, eventually 10 yrs later I gave it to my daughter and told her if she wanted to sell it, she could.
That wasn't the last gift, the last gift was something he had to labor for. He built me a slate walkway, I hated that also, even though I always wanted it. You may ask why? It's because what I wanted more than anything else was to be recognized and to be treated like I was a human. I hit my own rock bottom with that.
I do understand.
(((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))
amy
Here for you whenever you need a friend.
One time my now ex bought me a Waterford hummingbird. I was ecstatic over it. I thought he put so much though into this gift. I thought that he was actually thing about me and things I wanted, and things that I loved. No, that wasn't true. I thought about that Waterford hummingbird after hearing some disparaging words to me, and I went for a drive with that hummingbird. I was going to throw it in the river, it meant nothing to me, it was just another way to try to buy me. I didn't throw it in the river, I told him I did, eventually 10 yrs later I gave it to my daughter and told her if she wanted to sell it, she could.
That wasn't the last gift, the last gift was something he had to labor for. He built me a slate walkway, I hated that also, even though I always wanted it. You may ask why? It's because what I wanted more than anything else was to be recognized and to be treated like I was a human. I hit my own rock bottom with that.
I do understand.
(((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))
amy
Here for you whenever you need a friend.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,944
Hello samlynn,
We always encourage those who are leaving partners in a potentially volatile situation to be silent about their plans.
That is very important.
What some don't understand is that you have to continue to "play the part" while making the escape plan. We get it, really!!
Keep working your plan, keep erasing your browser history when you sign out of the computer or your phone. Keep going!!
One breath, one step at a time.
For those of you who are not familiar with situations of this sort, I strongly recommend reading "How to Leave" at the link below.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...how-leave.html (How to leave)
We always encourage those who are leaving partners in a potentially volatile situation to be silent about their plans.
That is very important.
What some don't understand is that you have to continue to "play the part" while making the escape plan. We get it, really!!
Keep working your plan, keep erasing your browser history when you sign out of the computer or your phone. Keep going!!
One breath, one step at a time.
For those of you who are not familiar with situations of this sort, I strongly recommend reading "How to Leave" at the link below.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...how-leave.html (How to leave)
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
