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Life can be cruel.

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Old 10-18-2018, 07:31 AM
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Life can be cruel.

It was not long ago I posted about a lifelong friend of mine had decided to end his life. Left behind a wife and daughter.

Yesterday another life long friend of mine (we were high school and college team mates and college roommates), incurred tragedy. Just 3 short weeks ago he sent his only son off to college on a wrestling scholarship and they found him dead in his dorm room yesterday morning. I can't imagine the pain.

I share this because I have always been one to focus on the good things we have in life, because someone, somewhere always has it worse then us.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:35 AM
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Thomas-

I’m so very sorry for your loss and for your friends loss. We are not supposed to bury our children.

we know very little about what kind of pain and burdens people carry as we walk by them in the street, or in the grocery store, or as we stand next to them in the elevator .

IMO, God does not give us these things to test our faith. This is life. And what matters are the friends and family we do have.

So we take this day to Gladden the hearts of those who travel with us, for the road is short and can end abruptly.

((((((Thomas)))))))
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:51 AM
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I always try now not to say "be grateful because someone else somewhere is having it harder than you" because for the person that is suffering for whatever reason this is kind of taking away their right to be upset over their own situation. They then start beating themselves up for being in pain as it's not as bad as someone else's pain, pain is pain and we all feel it for different reasons.

I am really sad for your friend losing his son, I cannot imagine how crushing this must have been and my heart goes out to the family and friends of this young man.

X
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:42 AM
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I hope you are weathering these storms well, thomas. It's a good sign that you're posting here, communicating. Life can be strange in how it spreads its beauty and tragedy.

I know you didn't mention that you were thinking of drinking, but this is something I've been thinking about lately. For some reason, it is ingrained in our culture to drink when we are faced with negative circumstances. A break up, a loss, a tragic event. But, in my experience, drinking hardly numbs the pain so much as it prolongs pain. Sober, you can heal naturally with time. Drunk, you stay stuck in a negative feedback loop, always revisiting tragedy and feeling pity. Sober, you can deal with ups and downs with a clear mind, coming out even stronger. Drunk, you are lucky if you even come out.
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Old 10-18-2018, 04:01 PM
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I'm so sorry for your friends loss, Jeff.

D
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Old 10-18-2018, 04:31 PM
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Thomas I’m very sorry to hear this, it is truly heart-breaking. It’s always sad when an innocent life is lost, but there’s something that stings especially hard when it’s a kid.

Take care man.
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Old 10-18-2018, 04:55 PM
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No, life certainly isn't fair. I am sorry for your friend's loss of his son.
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Old 10-18-2018, 05:16 PM
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I think "life is cruel" is even more true. Nothing is promised, nothing is guaranteed and no one in the world is going to be spared suffering. What we do with the gifts life brings, between the suffering, is up to us.
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Old 10-18-2018, 05:22 PM
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Imagine dealing with this 'life stuff',while acitively drinking/drugging!! Life is ALWAYS gonna happen..Our children,parents,spouse(s),'loved ones',ourselves,ect..will die. That's just life. How you handle those circumstances and help others cope/deal with them, is what being mentally/emotionally 'available/strong/sober' is all about(if that's what you want) people can count on you.... life isn't really "cruel"..but you're able to handle/accept life,on life's term's for those you care about and yourself... possibly try to guide them to some form of serinity/acceptance? if that 'ramble' makes any sense?..sorry if it doesn't..

Imagine drunk you 'dealing with this", is I guess what I'm trying to say..

Sorry. My thoughts are with your family.
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Old 10-18-2018, 05:44 PM
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I'm so sorry Jeff. I will keep your friend andhis family in my prayers during this unimaginable time.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:04 PM
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So very sorry.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:38 PM
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I am so very sorry for your loss and your friends loss. I feel like human beings are the cruel ones not life. Life is life and is equal for all we all die and death has not algorithmic skill to choose whose young or old. for all we know death could be a rebirth into another form of life and it ends any physical suffering for sure.

to me poverty and injustice are more cruel and those are man made. anyways sorry about these difficult moments you are going thru.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:26 PM
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I’m so sorry, Thomas
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Old 10-19-2018, 02:04 AM
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Hoping you find peace, serenity and
strength during this trying time.
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Old 10-19-2018, 03:09 AM
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I'm so sorry Jeff.
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Old 10-19-2018, 12:41 PM
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Update: First, I vow that my next thread will be a positive one as opposed to doom and gloom.

That being said, my friend said the autopsy revealed an un-diagnosed heart defect and nothing could be done. For what its worth.
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Old 10-19-2018, 04:54 PM
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There's no law requiring you to only post positively Jeff. As I get older the likelihood of me losing people I love grows greater - it sucks but it's an inescapable part of life, y'know?

I'm glad you could bring it here.

D
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Old 10-20-2018, 12:45 AM
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So sorry for your loss Thomas
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Old 10-20-2018, 01:30 AM
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SR is here for you in good and times and bad!
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Old 10-20-2018, 02:35 AM
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Wishing you and your friends family all the strength possible to overcome the tragedy of loosing a child.
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