How to beat cravings?
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 271
How to beat cravings?
A post by lessgravity described a situation of Resist and the problem persists. This is difficult the harder you resist the more pressure is exerted until you cave in.
Today for me has been hell but I know temptation will come in about 2/3 days getting past this sticking point is a major problem for me.
Has anyone any suggestions on how to prevent relapse by stopping cravings?
Today for me has been hell but I know temptation will come in about 2/3 days getting past this sticking point is a major problem for me.
Has anyone any suggestions on how to prevent relapse by stopping cravings?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 1,137
I found the AVRT stuff very helpful. Seeing the craving as a beast inside of me wanting to be fed, a beast that also wants to kill me. So every time I'd give in and feed it, it would be even stronger and more convincing the next time. Not giving in will make it weaker and weaker and slowly starve it.
So it's no longer "do I drink or not?" it's "do I feed a beast that wants to kill me or not?" It becomes me versus the beast.
That's the mental part that helped me. Also I made a list with all the reasons why I don't want to drink / can't drink and hat it with me at all times to look at it when my brain would start rationalising.
And for the physical aspect: make sure you're always as well fed and hydrated as possible. Sleep is also very important. Sometimes when I had cravings it would help to even just drink some water and eat something sweet. Our bodies got used to get a lot of energy out of the alcohol (it does have a lot of calories) and sometimes our brain misinterprets the signal and thinks we crave alcohol when our bodies just need energy or hydration. Of course that won't always solve the issue but sometimes it did the trick for me.
Also distraction helps. Like eating something spicy or physical activity, reading something that is interesting,...
So it's no longer "do I drink or not?" it's "do I feed a beast that wants to kill me or not?" It becomes me versus the beast.
That's the mental part that helped me. Also I made a list with all the reasons why I don't want to drink / can't drink and hat it with me at all times to look at it when my brain would start rationalising.
And for the physical aspect: make sure you're always as well fed and hydrated as possible. Sleep is also very important. Sometimes when I had cravings it would help to even just drink some water and eat something sweet. Our bodies got used to get a lot of energy out of the alcohol (it does have a lot of calories) and sometimes our brain misinterprets the signal and thinks we crave alcohol when our bodies just need energy or hydration. Of course that won't always solve the issue but sometimes it did the trick for me.
Also distraction helps. Like eating something spicy or physical activity, reading something that is interesting,...
HC - have you heard of/tried 'urge surfing'? If you search the forums you'll find the seminal post by Dee that outlines it. I've found the method to be extremely helpful with cravings/urges for booze and then even helpful in life generally when dealing with obsessive/negative thoughts.
Resist/persist is an idea that I think applies to getting sober in that I see all the issues of my life that I resisted/avoided/procrastinated on never went away. In fact all they did was lie in wait, grow larger, worse and uglier.
In early sobriety though, resisting the urge is sometimes all we can do!
Also, as others have said and I've truly experienced now - those obsessive thoughts do fade with time. Learn to urge surf, I thank Dee for this concept all the time. I think it can be a life changer.
Resist/persist is an idea that I think applies to getting sober in that I see all the issues of my life that I resisted/avoided/procrastinated on never went away. In fact all they did was lie in wait, grow larger, worse and uglier.
In early sobriety though, resisting the urge is sometimes all we can do!
Also, as others have said and I've truly experienced now - those obsessive thoughts do fade with time. Learn to urge surf, I thank Dee for this concept all the time. I think it can be a life changer.
I found that if I have a craving to drink, eating something makes it go away. I used to walk my dogs each time I wanted to drink. They loved all the walks and by the time we got home, the craving had passed.
agree with all above....MOST cravings really only last about 10-12 minutes, give or take. so if one were to set the kitchen timer for 15 minutes, the craving would be OVER before it went ding.
if our mind is truly made up that we are done with alcohol and are not going to drink today NO MATTER WHAT, then the craving really loses a lot of juice (no pun intended).
we don't ARGUE with the thoughts or voices, we acknowledge and then do something else. turn your thoughts to something else. don't dwell. don't listen. and know that EVERY time we do not give in, our sober side just got that much stronger.
staying sober is WAY easier than staying drunk.
if our mind is truly made up that we are done with alcohol and are not going to drink today NO MATTER WHAT, then the craving really loses a lot of juice (no pun intended).
we don't ARGUE with the thoughts or voices, we acknowledge and then do something else. turn your thoughts to something else. don't dwell. don't listen. and know that EVERY time we do not give in, our sober side just got that much stronger.
staying sober is WAY easier than staying drunk.
My cravings always kick it when I start obsessing about things. It's great advice to acknowledge but not dwell on them.
Two things that definintely help me....food, either something sweet of sometimes shear volume! Also, meditation. Mindful peace channel on Youtube has been a life saver for me on many occassions.
Two things that definintely help me....food, either something sweet of sometimes shear volume! Also, meditation. Mindful peace channel on Youtube has been a life saver for me on many occassions.
A post by lessgravity described a situation of Resist and the problem persists. This is difficult the harder you resist the more pressure is exerted until you cave in.
Today for me has been hell but I know temptation will come in about 2/3 days getting past this sticking point is a major problem for me.
Has anyone any suggestions on how to prevent relapse by stopping cravings?
Today for me has been hell but I know temptation will come in about 2/3 days getting past this sticking point is a major problem for me.
Has anyone any suggestions on how to prevent relapse by stopping cravings?
As others have said, urge surfing is an excellent tool to help with those early cravings. Also, have a list of alternate activities prepared ahead of time so if and when the urge strikes you have an immediate plan of action. Someone here told me about a "Go bag" they had packed for when urges hit. The contents would be catered to the individual obviously but can include things like a favorite snack, a book, a craft or activity, inspirational quotes and sayings, etc etc.
Something that helped me in the very beginning is controversial, but I bought a vaping kit with zero nicotine vape juice. I hardly ever use it now but in the beginning it helped so much. Something about the deep breathing and hit to the lungs.
The biggest tool for me with cravings was shared with the awesome people here on SR, and it was training my mind to associate getting drunk with negativity. I'll re-quote something I shared earlier this week because it was key for me:
I discovered that drinking cravings were nothing more than my beast-brain (the part of me that wanted to keep drinking) glorifying being drunk, romanticizing it, while ignoring the ugly reality that it was actually destroying my mind and body and my life.
I'm at a place now that the thought of ever getting drunk again is baffling. Why would I want to spend the money, consume the calories, isolate myself (near a toilet of course for the endless peeing) only to get my mind to a state where I'm not in control and will likely forget half of what I did anyway? For the reward of short burst of "good feelings" the buzz gives me? I can get that buzz naturally now through exercise and activity, only now I wake up the next day rested and clear headed, feeling good about myself instead of passing out on the couch at 9, waking up at midnight and spending the next 7 hours staring at the ceiling, and the next day sleep deprived, nauseous and dehydrated, not to mention ashamed, embarrassed, and anxious. It really is a no brainer.
Looking back the things I used to do were comical, but they worked.
I would - freeze all my paper money while I felt strong - took ages to defrost and I could hardly take wet money out with me.
I have really long hair, so to combat cravings (get relief from them) I'd stick my head under the shower - took forever to dry, by which time cravings had passed.
A few times, I gave my cards to a friend with instructions not to give them back until after the weekend (I was a weekend warrior, when it came to booze)
Other than that, sometimes I just couldnt afford to, but in all cases, it's whatever it takes to remove the OPTION.
Good luck
I would - freeze all my paper money while I felt strong - took ages to defrost and I could hardly take wet money out with me.
I have really long hair, so to combat cravings (get relief from them) I'd stick my head under the shower - took forever to dry, by which time cravings had passed.
A few times, I gave my cards to a friend with instructions not to give them back until after the weekend (I was a weekend warrior, when it came to booze)
Other than that, sometimes I just couldnt afford to, but in all cases, it's whatever it takes to remove the OPTION.
Good luck
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: California
Posts: 182
I'm noticing how "mental" the cravings are. That three headed dragon where there is a situation, I distort it, it causes feelings/emotions/thoughts that are nine times out of ten completely illogical or overdramatic, and then you use. Drinking or giving in to the craving is the final nail in the coffin, not the beginning. And working backwards is where I find it so difficult. So what's been working for me, like others above have mentioned, is doing my best to control the AV. I've been using CBT techniques, and challenging myself to dig past the external emotions to see what's really underneath. For instance, I tried to instigate a fight with my roommate because I was beyond irritated about a grocery situation that was her flipping idea. I made myself get up walk away, but threw my little tantrum and tell myself "eff it, I'm drinking a bottle of wine right in front her". For ten minutes, I meditated and prayed and asked questions of myself while I cried, and discovered that underneath that blinding, petty rage I was extremely hurt that my feelings weren't being regarded or considered and I don't know if I really value her as a friend. Then I'm thinking, why the hell drink over someone who may not support you, and screw yourself over? It sounds elementary, but it's been very helpful. I'm tired of letting myself get slumped over the wheel in front of the liquor store crying because "I have to drink, I just know I can't fight this".
And once the craving passes, I realize I really didn't even want to drink. Even now at 6:30 in the morning, I'd most likely be having a glass of chardonnay. And right now, that I'm more "emotionally fit", it sounds absolutely abhorrent.
That is what has been working for me. Either way, this is a great post, and all of these suggestions sound extremely helpful for loading our arsenal!
And once the craving passes, I realize I really didn't even want to drink. Even now at 6:30 in the morning, I'd most likely be having a glass of chardonnay. And right now, that I'm more "emotionally fit", it sounds absolutely abhorrent.
That is what has been working for me. Either way, this is a great post, and all of these suggestions sound extremely helpful for loading our arsenal!
The term Urge surfing has been mentioned before and it has helped me. My problem with drinking was a result of self medicating through stress and numbing my feelings and it became a habit whether I was stressed or not. I went through therapy to find better stress management techniques. I also take some natural calming supplements my naturepath recommended. I have had to learn to “feel my feelings”and accept whatever I am feeling. I also had to learn that everything that I am feeling and that happens will pass. This includes the cravings. Eventually, not giving into cravings and reprogramming my brain to pick up a new activity when I felt the craving has made urges less frequent and go away more quickly. Recently I had so,e stressful events and just coming here to participate and post helped prevent a relapse.
agree with all above....MOST cravings really only last about 10-12 minutes, give or take. so if one were to set the kitchen timer for 15 minutes, the craving would be OVER before it went ding.
if our mind is truly made up that we are done with alcohol and are not going to drink today NO MATTER WHAT, then the craving really loses a lot of juice (no pun intended).
we don't ARGUE with the thoughts or voices, we acknowledge and then do something else. turn your thoughts to something else. don't dwell. don't listen. and know that EVERY time we do not give in, our sober side just got that much stronger.
staying sober is WAY easier than staying drunk.
if our mind is truly made up that we are done with alcohol and are not going to drink today NO MATTER WHAT, then the craving really loses a lot of juice (no pun intended).
we don't ARGUE with the thoughts or voices, we acknowledge and then do something else. turn your thoughts to something else. don't dwell. don't listen. and know that EVERY time we do not give in, our sober side just got that much stronger.
staying sober is WAY easier than staying drunk.
PS I love your name.
Getting past cravings by willpower alone rarely works for the long term. You need a "bag of tricks".
As others have said, urge surfing is an excellent tool to help with those early cravings. Also, have a list of alternate activities prepared ahead of time so if and when the urge strikes you have an immediate plan of action. Someone here told me about a "Go bag" they had packed for when urges hit. The contents would be catered to the individual obviously but can include things like a favorite snack, a book, a craft or activity, inspirational quotes and sayings, etc etc.
Something that helped me in the very beginning is controversial, but I bought a vaping kit with zero nicotine vape juice. I hardly ever use it now but in the beginning it helped so much. Something about the deep breathing and hit to the lungs.
The biggest tool for me with cravings was shared with the awesome people here on SR, and it was training my mind to associate getting drunk with negativity. I'll re-quote something I shared earlier this week because it was key for me:
I discovered that drinking cravings were nothing more than my beast-brain (the part of me that wanted to keep drinking) glorifying being drunk, romanticizing it, while ignoring the ugly reality that it was actually destroying my mind and body and my life.
I'm at a place now that the thought of ever getting drunk again is baffling. Why would I want to spend the money, consume the calories, isolate myself (near a toilet of course for the endless peeing) only to get my mind to a state where I'm not in control and will likely forget half of what I did anyway? For the reward of short burst of "good feelings" the buzz gives me? I can get that buzz naturally now through exercise and activity, only now I wake up the next day rested and clear headed, feeling good about myself instead of passing out on the couch at 9, waking up at midnight and spending the next 7 hours staring at the ceiling, and the next day sleep deprived, nauseous and dehydrated, not to mention ashamed, embarrassed, and anxious. It really is a no brainer.
As others have said, urge surfing is an excellent tool to help with those early cravings. Also, have a list of alternate activities prepared ahead of time so if and when the urge strikes you have an immediate plan of action. Someone here told me about a "Go bag" they had packed for when urges hit. The contents would be catered to the individual obviously but can include things like a favorite snack, a book, a craft or activity, inspirational quotes and sayings, etc etc.
Something that helped me in the very beginning is controversial, but I bought a vaping kit with zero nicotine vape juice. I hardly ever use it now but in the beginning it helped so much. Something about the deep breathing and hit to the lungs.
The biggest tool for me with cravings was shared with the awesome people here on SR, and it was training my mind to associate getting drunk with negativity. I'll re-quote something I shared earlier this week because it was key for me:
I discovered that drinking cravings were nothing more than my beast-brain (the part of me that wanted to keep drinking) glorifying being drunk, romanticizing it, while ignoring the ugly reality that it was actually destroying my mind and body and my life.
I'm at a place now that the thought of ever getting drunk again is baffling. Why would I want to spend the money, consume the calories, isolate myself (near a toilet of course for the endless peeing) only to get my mind to a state where I'm not in control and will likely forget half of what I did anyway? For the reward of short burst of "good feelings" the buzz gives me? I can get that buzz naturally now through exercise and activity, only now I wake up the next day rested and clear headed, feeling good about myself instead of passing out on the couch at 9, waking up at midnight and spending the next 7 hours staring at the ceiling, and the next day sleep deprived, nauseous and dehydrated, not to mention ashamed, embarrassed, and anxious. It really is a no brainer.
Going on a diet when I was trying to get over the hellish craves made things worse.
I ate like a horse and hit the gym to keep the weight off.
My cholesterol went up because I was eating bad stuff. BP too.
Now that I am this clean, I eat better.
But initially, I traded food for booze.
My go to word for getting clean is...suffering.
When I jog, I suffer. After a while I get into a groove. I still suffer, but it is not as bad.
That is where I am now. I still suffer...daily. I crave daily. But, not as bad as 3 years ago.
Thanks.
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