joeready

Hi, guys I'm currently 22 years old and I want to completely quit drinking for good! It's taken a hold of most my adult life, and it's been an apparent problem in important aspects of my life such as work, school, commitments, etc,. I'm lucky that I have family and a girl friend that really care about me through it all, though my family isn't aware how serious my problem is. When I do drink, I seem to not be able to stop, and evidentally black out, or empty my bank account, and then I spend the next day or even days in dread, or I end up binge drinking again.
I've told myself and others countless times that I'll stop drinking, and after a while, my words don't seem to mean anything when I start drinking again, and I feel like im going insane.

I went to addictions counselling a month or two ago I didnt drink or smoke cigarettes for 3 weeks but I never followed up to make an appointment, or followed through with any of the group counselling, and

Honestly, I just went to be a better person to those around me who care, before I lose them too..

Basically, I'm just asking for as many tips as I can get to stay sober for good!

Thanks everyone, and I'm glad I'm now a part of this community.

AtomicBlue

Sounds like some of my drinking experience. I'd also say that I'd drink until I run out or pass out.

It's worth being a better person for yourself too!

I've met many people your age who quit and have a happy sober life now. It's good you're doing this now! Have you considered outpatient treatment or AA?

joeready

Could you elaborate on outpatient treatment?
And the thought of AA or group treatments terrify me, I find it very hard to tell others what I'm going through, I get anxious to the point where I can't even put how I feel in words

AtomicBlue

Outpatient treatment for me was going to a treatment center after work 4 days a week for 2 hours. The number of days then gradually decreased. There was a lot of group therapy. Didn't think I would like that AT ALL, but am super glad I went. There's a reason they do it that way. I also had to work through the anxiety to talk to others and how to put my feelings into words. It's very common amongst alcoholics so everyone will understand what you're going through. They even had a hand out sheet with words to describe feelings! I know it seems kind of silly. Also AA is nice if you can go with someone you know, but that might not be possible if you don't know anyone who goes. There are AA meetings just for younger people if that makes you feel more comfortable. Also, you absolutely do not have to talk at a meeting! Just say you're there to listen and pass.

D122y

Joe,

Nothing but good can come from quitting.

The real only bad news I think about is that the mental addiction is for life.

It never goes away.

But, I defeat the crave with my desire to remain pure and strong and the education I have gotten from Sr and the internet.

In my time at Sr, I have read thousands of posts. There has been exactly 0 that said they were glad they started drinking again once they quit.

Exactly 0.

Easy math.

Thanks.

least

Welcome to the family. Do you have a sobriety plan? A good plan can include posting on this site every day, posting if you feel like drinking so we can talk you out of it.

My plan was using this site, and weekly counseling. I no longer see the counselor but am on here every day. It's kept me sober for over 8 yrs now. I hope we can help you get sober for good too.

You're smart to get sober so young. You'll have a lot fewer regrets when you get older if you stay sober.

Dee74

Welcome aboard Joe

D

anadenanthera

I think many alcoholics share your experience. We drink until we run out, and if it's not too late, a lot of us will get in the car to go get more, or beg someone to drive us. Really terrible stuff.

That's one trait that makes an alcoholic. It sounds like you're not a daily drinker, which is great, but not all alcoholics are daily drinkers (or at least not yet).

People have certain concepts about what an alcoholic is and looks like. In fact, they still tell me all the time that I'm not an alcoholic even though they've never seen me without a beer in my hand. I don't know if they're in denial or just trying to be nice, but it's something you might face yourself.

They might tell you that you don't have to quit altogether, you just have to cut back. That's the famous slippery slope.

I think that's the most important thing to realize. Our brains, for whatever reason, will always want more more more.

If you could just drink one or two and stop, you wouldn't be an alcoholic, you'd just be a normal drinker. And that's the thing that stays with you forever: the inability to drink normally. If you relapse and have one beer, you're going to want twelve or eighteen or infinity.

I was sober for over three years, then I had one beer. The next day, I said, "hey, that wasn't so hard. I had one beer, then I stopped. I guess I'm cured. I can drink normally now."

Then I had more beers, every day, for another 2-1/2 years.

It's really great that you are 22 and already know you want it to stop. I knew I had a problem at 22, but I kept drinking for years. If you kept drinking, you would continue to do things that leave you feeling awful like you describe, continue to hurt people. You could have kept hurting yourself and everyone else for five, ten, twenty, thirty years, or the rest of your life.

The first time I went sober, it really helped that I had really specific motivations: I wanted to be fit and healthy, I needed my money for more important things, I wanted to invest in a business, I wanted to get my license back (two DUIs), and I wanted to go through the mental health program I was in and take my medications. So that was all very concrete, and I only relapsed a few times before I succeeded.

I mention the mental health program, because that was important, I was seeing a counsellor and a psychiatrist quite often, and that kept me accountable.

Until I had that one beer, so that is the key thing that you must do: never think that you are cured, that you can now just drink normally.

Another thing that helped me was taking my fitness very seriously. Once I learned all about nutrition and exercise, and started seeing awesome results, I couldn't imagine ruining it with alcohol. That is, until I had that one beer.

Your mind is going to play tricks on you and come up with all kinds of justifications and excuses for having one drink, or getting drunk just one more time. Maybe it's because you're nervous, or you're having company, or your back hurts, or you have to clean your garage, or your going fishing, or you have a cough, or you just feel like it. For me it was a family reunion on New Years Eve.

So that's where the fight usually is. Developing support systems, setting concrete goals, seeking treatment if necessary for any underlying problems, finding others to talk to, finding new hobbies and interests, are all extremely helpful.

You can try AA. I read the Big Book, it was actually really interesting, and it shows that alcoholism was the same in the 20s and 30s as it is today. Technology changes but addiction doesn't.

But the most important thing is just not having another drink, and knowing why you can't have another drink. If you fall off the wagon and wake up hungover, you just have to start again, and don't have another drink.

Anyway, that's my two cents. I hope it's helpful. I really hope you succeed at this, just coming on here at all shows you really want it. You can do this!