Two months and now it’s stubborness
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 22
Two months and now it’s stubborness
April 16th was the first day for a one month trial of no alcohol. It’s now a little over two months and and still sober!
Now I’ve had the worst two wks of hell at work and yes there was nothing I wanted more then coming home, opening a cold bottle of vino and bursting out crying but instead I changed, went in the garden with a tall glass of juice, decorated the rim with a a slice of orange and a strawberry and thinking I’m guzzling a vodka and orange! Sure I didn’t get the immediate feeling of relaxation of my super tense muscles and a numb brain and yes I cursed my boss and drunkard husband but sitting on the grass, I was in piece and quiet, only hearing the birds and was all alone. No husband drunk and causing arguments and hearing insults and no horrible boss blaming me for her mistakes. I was in complete isolation in my own thoughts. Sure I bawled my eyes out but it felt good to have just me, myself and I and not resorting to alcohol thinking I needed a quick fix. Guess I knew my problems will still be there tomorrow along with empty bottles, less money in my purse and a hangover.
Now I’ve had the worst two wks of hell at work and yes there was nothing I wanted more then coming home, opening a cold bottle of vino and bursting out crying but instead I changed, went in the garden with a tall glass of juice, decorated the rim with a a slice of orange and a strawberry and thinking I’m guzzling a vodka and orange! Sure I didn’t get the immediate feeling of relaxation of my super tense muscles and a numb brain and yes I cursed my boss and drunkard husband but sitting on the grass, I was in piece and quiet, only hearing the birds and was all alone. No husband drunk and causing arguments and hearing insults and no horrible boss blaming me for her mistakes. I was in complete isolation in my own thoughts. Sure I bawled my eyes out but it felt good to have just me, myself and I and not resorting to alcohol thinking I needed a quick fix. Guess I knew my problems will still be there tomorrow along with empty bottles, less money in my purse and a hangover.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
that sounds very serene in spite of problems, allie.
and way to go on accepting that days can be crappy,others can be crappy, urges can be present....and still you can make decisions in a better direction.
and way to go on accepting that days can be crappy,others can be crappy, urges can be present....and still you can make decisions in a better direction.
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Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 80
You are learning to deal with life’s problems without alcohol. That is a tremendous step. Many people can quit, but as soon as they face a challenge, stress, or have a bad day, they tend to relapse and go back.
The more your handle your issues sober, the easier it will become. You have succeeded mentally today. That’s the sign of someone who is truly passionate and serious about their recovery.
The more your handle your issues sober, the easier it will become. You have succeeded mentally today. That’s the sign of someone who is truly passionate and serious about their recovery.
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