Silviadee

I’m so confused as to why my alcoholic husband left me? I don’t nag him or bother him to do anything at all like I use to but he always seems so angry and snappy. I do everything for him and treat him w respect while he misses work, doesn’t want to pay for bills and groceries and always at the bar. He has now moved out to an apartment that cost two times what we pay. Just don’t understand him at all.

Mattq2

When I was drinking I rarely behaved like a normal person. In my case I hated myself so much for what I had become. I don’t remember exactly how the saying goes but you can’t love others if you don’t love yourself. In my opinion trying to understand how a alcoholic thinks is impossible. I would concentrate on taking care of yourself and protect your interests. That’s the advice I should have given my wife years ago.

least

When I was drinking, that's all I wanted to do - drink. Sounds like he just wants to have his cake and eat it too. Do you have any support for yourself? I'd suggest AlAnon for real life support. We also have a friends and family forum you might find helpful.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/

Silviadee

How did you quit? I want him to quit so bad but I’m not even sure he wants to continue w our marriage any longer. I love him so much but we are at the point I don’t even do anything and he seems frustrated w me. In the back of my mind I even think he did this to possibly start a new relationship. Just hurts so bad that I have stuck by him for 18 years and he could so easily walk away. He has not even attempted to contact me at all and it’s been so hard but I’m trying to stay strong and not give in and call him. It’s been a week am I miss him. 😞. Just feeling very down at the moment.

Amusic

I'm going through a very similar situation with my bf except we live together and I wish he would leave ( actually I wish he would get Better and care for himself and me but that seems to be an impossible wish). My advice would be to not reach out to him. When my guy leaves to go drink he ignores me completely. I've learned to ignore him back no matter how much it hurts. I went to an Alanon meeting tonight and I just finished reading this book: "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie. This book was a life saver. We also have senseless fights and he snaps at me over the most ridiculous things. It has made me feel certifiably insane. But you have to go on and take care of yourself. I'm sorry and I understand. I hope things will improve for the best.