Bags

I had pancreatitis 12/16 and almost died. Drank for 40 years and choice to stop or die. Developed stone and cysts and was in hospital for over a month and sick for 4-5 months, lost 60 lbs. since about 6/17 been better, up 35 lbs and health much better. Was out of work for a year working on wife’s illness with trips to Mayo, Cleveland. Now we’re both better physically but I’m bored and finding tough to find work. I would think I’d feel so much better not being sick, but I’m just down in dumps. Wife gets enough $ to get by but I just feel like I’m not drinking, healthy, and should be happier...but not?

Midwest1981

I think it is the time of year where it is easy to get down. Especially if you live somewhere where your not getting enough sunshine.

I have noticed in sobriety I can have a period of feeling down and then I have to push through it and then I am fine again. I think everyone goes through things like that.

DontRemember

Glad you're both feeling better. If I were you and salary isn't really an issue, I'd just go do anything to feel more productive for now. I've talked to a few guys from AA about their wives making enough to live decently-very well off. This one guy I talk to I would consider very well off. He started working part time at a gas station for something to do and interact with people. Sure he drives a car that costs more than his yearly salary,but he seems happy. He told me if he didn't have anything to do he'd still be drinking the way he had been for the past 5yrs.

Bags

Good to see other posts and suggestions

faith823

Hello Bags

(((hugs))) I understand about finding work. I am out of work and having the same problem. I am stressed to the hilt.

It will happen in time. Is there a recruiter head hunter in your area?
They have awesome contacts and they want to place you somewhere since they get a commission. They really sell you and like I said
have so many connections.

I am so glad your health is better and you are alive.

Being out of work myself I enjoy starting dinner early. Do you like to cook? maybe look up recipes and suprise your wife with a special
meal when she arrives home.

Good luck this feeling will pass

Dee74

Welcome to SR Bags - glad you made it through all that

when all else failed for me I filled my days with volunteering in my community -
helped me, helped others and looked good on my CV.

D

Berrybean

It sounds like the physical aspect of recovery has taken precedence up to now, and perhaps it's time to add some new things into your recovery plan.i don't know if you've ever heard of PAWs. This article really helped me to understand the need for working on the mental, emotional and spiritual side of things when i got to 6 months sober and felt bleak and hopeless. https://digital-dharma.net/post-acut...r-immediately/

For me getting involved in the 12-step program of recovery with an AA sponsor and volunteering locally really made a massive difference. The world looks very different to me now. Gratitude Lists are a great tool as well.

BB

Bags

Appreciate the good ideas.

Forward12

40 years of poisoning yourself is a long time, and the consequences as you experienced have shown.
That is great you are sober now, but just not drinking isn't sobriety, you need to get a solid path to recovery. Be it AA, an addiction therapist, or other resource.
You literally need to relearn life, and how amazing it is without being under the foot of alcohol!