Lou81

My partner is coming off of prescription meds’ and alcohol and will be away for so months . I love him dearly and the time doesn’t bother I’m
Just scared they will tell
Him to cut all ties does anyone have experiences of this

Anna

I'm glad that your partner is seeking help for his addiction.

You could find AlAnon in your city a good support for you during this time.

least

There is an unwritten rule in recovery programs about not starting relationships during your first year sober. This is not about ending ongoing relationships, but just not starting new ones.

If you have questions of the rehab, can you call and talk to someone about it?

Ken0331

The rehab I went to also told us not to make any major life decisions in the first year unless they were urgent and unavoidable. That includes ending healthy relationships.

Unhealthy ones - ones where the other person has an active substance abuse problem, or insists on "their right" to use or drink "recreationally" shouldn't be taken away b/c of our problem. Those people often had individual sessions with the counselor that included a joint counselor-led conversation with his/her significant other before rehab ended.

It's common for people in rehab to have major limitations on contact with loved ones back home while there. We're in rehab to work on us, and the constant distractions of the messed-up lives we were leading can get in the way of working on us.

Is that what you're concerned about? Or him being told to dump you completely? Are you doing things that, were he to talk to his counselor there about them, that you fear would result in him being told to "cut all ties" to you when he leaves?

Lou81

I certainly abused alcohol alongside him but not ina dependant way and I’ve agreed to go alcohol free just wondering what to expect from the next six months

Lou81

I’m also finding since he’s not drinking he has become cold and distant he says he still
Loves me but has to isolate himself at the moment for fear of a relapse prior to going in is this normal

DontRemember

I didn't go to rehab,but I needed to isolate myself for a while to get my messed up head/feelings in focus instead of the 'spinning cyclone' of thoughts I had in my brain. I did end my 10+yr relationship after about 3mo sober because we were toxic for each other and I would not have stayed sober dealing with her. I say that not to scare you,but you need to really evaluate your relationship. Were you lovers AND drinking buddies? Did most of your activities revolve around drinking? I mean really think honestly about the day-day of your relationship. As was mentioned Alnon would be great for you to go to while they're away at rehab. The friends and family section here is great as well.
Best wishes to you both!

Ken0331

Lou, I can't speak for the rehab he's in, only the experience from the one I was in. First week, no phone calls, no visitors. Second week, two - three briefs phone calls, and a visit on Sunday.

Call the rehab he went to and ask for the policy on both to settle your mind.

When I stopped drinking my mind was a mess for quite a while. That may come off to you as being distant and cold. But what's going on is the brain is being deprived of something it had to cope with, manage the flood of massive amounts of alcohol, and it physically changes and it adjusted to that. Now, without it the brain is struggling to adjust to life without it.

Not to mention that his psyche has lost it's coping mechanism, it's reward and pleasure. Those have to be replaced with healthy ones. Until all those things happen, he's not better yet. All he's done is to stop drinking. That's only but a necessary first step to sobriety and recovery. He's got a lot of work to do on himself now, and that will feel like he's got no time or feelings for you.