Gatordadof3

My first post was much better and I felt better. Daily life and issues with business have now created what I feel best as describing a white knuckle struggle. I haven't drank but I sure want to, I'm resisting because I can't stand to bare letting myself and family down. I was feeling so positive before but you add in some life difficulties and that all goes out the window. I sure hope managing this gets better as I go.

Dave84

I'm on day 1 gator so you're doing alot better than I am. If you've made it 2 months, you can make it another 2 months. I cant speak from experience, but maybe try doing something different with the kids to take your mind off it and break the cycle? Stay strong.

Stronger2017

I’m really sorry to hear you’re struggling. I reread through your previous thread. How is it going with the counseling you mentioned? Maybe you could start doing more of that or maybe add some other kind of support. I try to post here a fair bit, which seems to help. Would you consider reaching out here more often (if you’re not doing so already)?

alexandrav

Gator, congrats on almost hitting the two-month mark! That is enviable. I'm only on Day 4 (this time around), and I can completely relate to what you say about white-knuckling. The cravings are impossible. I do *hear* that they start to fade with time, but we'll never know if we keep restarting the clock, right? Hang in there! It seems like a Herculean task sometimes...

Gatordadof3

Thanks for all the kind words, yes it feels almost impossible of a task. That is why I got back on here this morning, I do go back to counseling on the 26th and I joined a men's soccer league that's already in week 4 of the season but a team needed players and I figured why not, it may help consume my time to keep my mind busy. I think it's also time I just give in and go to AA meetings, I'm gonna try to go Monday and give it my best, I'm desperate for anything to keep me sober.

FreeOwl

2 months is great. what's going on for your sobriety besides "not drinking"?


How are you supporting yourself in relieving stress? What are you doing to build the sober life you want?

When we find ourselves wanting to drink - it's generally a sign we haven't been putting action and change into making our sobriety real.

What can you shift to ensure you're staying whole and healthy and SOBER - not just "not drinking"?

Eaglelizard

Hi Gator, stay strong, I hear ya with the "additional life issues". I have also been dealing with mounting business/money issues while also quitting and trying to piece my mind and body back together for the past several months. Murphy's Law, really, but I just tell myself that God is testing me and I have no real choice anyway but to succeed. Soccer sounds like a good idea. With me, setting smaller, achievable goals (as opposed to those that will take more time & luck to sort out) has really helped shine a bit more light on day-to-day life. We really miss that as drunks, the feeling that, yes, there is a lot of unrelenting crap in the background, but that's probably going to be ok because I just set a new personal best today in XYZ or finished painting the thing with the guy or what have you. Best of luck.

hpdw

Hi and sorry your struggling right now .

In my experience and reading others on here the road to long term sobriety and recovery is often not as smooth steady as you would think .
I had good days bad days and a string of good days then maybe 4 rotten days .
Everyone is different with their recovery some get it easier than others .
I want a sober life more than anything else in the world . I love it and cherish it . I see my recovery as best friend . I do things now other than just not drinking . I changed my attitude and developed ACCEPTANCE that alcohol will destroy my life .my very existence .
Try not to just be sober but be in a state of recovery with some plans in place .

Bird615

For me, it was the AA fellowship and the 12 Steps that made all the difference between the torture of white-knuckling it and having a contented sobriety. Just not drinking never worked very long and being miserable and dry was it's own kind of hell.

It's wasn't easy and it took some effort and time, but putting in the work in AA was so worth it. Having a support program really helps.

DangerZone

That's your AV and the drug alcohol talking. Don't let it trick you. If you wanted to drink then you would and you would not be here posting... Don't do it.. You don't want to go back to Day-1 then it'll be that much harder to not drink again.

You can do this... Stay busy with things you enjoy doing and you will be fine. Maybe go to an AA meeting. You got this!

PurpleKnight

2 Months is fantastic!! :

For me I needed to put a few tools in the Sober toolbox, life is always going to throw a few curve balls, even in Sobriety, we just need to find ways of dealing with them without looking towards our default of a bottle, whether that be long walks in the fresh air, relax with some me time, do what you enjoy, find things that help you to switch off and hit the reset button after a long day.

You can do this!!

Dee74

some great advice here - congrats on 2 months gator dad - stick with it
D

rascalwhiteoak

Congrats on two months! I get how life can be stressful, but it sounds like you're taking the right steps to manage it.