SoberBlondie

I think this has been my most frustrated day in awhile.

I shared a super interesting and eye-opening article on FB about the rise of alcohol related illnesses in women and its relation to marketing (pink wine, 'wine o'clock' culture, yoga and beer events...).
So, a few of the moms I know in my town immediately wrote comments like :

'I'm reading this drinking a glass of wine and I disagree!'

Or

'The author needs to calm down and drink a glass of wine to mellow out.'

I don't know why but it INFURIATED ME. Here was 'proof in the pudding' of exactly the attitudes and behaviours the author was pointing out as problematic in our society.
Further, these moms don't seem to be phased that their unhealthy drinking habits affect their babies and young children.

I got into a bit of a FB debate- which is so unlike me as I am normally quite diplomatic and peaceful.

I just felt like their blasé attitudes undermined the reality of alcohol related problems (mine included) and made it seem like non-drinkers are just whiny biatches who need to chill out.

I'm really wanting to block the two moms in question from my life- we've only been friends for a few months and I just can't justify those types of attitudes in my vicinity.

Sorry, needed to rant!!!!!

Anna

I'm sorry you were upset by the comments. Maybe you could take a break from FB for a bit. And, the other Moms may not have unhealthy drinking habits. For me, wine/alcohol is a huge issue, but for many people, it isn't. Maybe it's just not a concern for them.

SoberBlondie

That's a good idea Anna

The only reason I say that they have unhealthy habits is because I've personally witnessed them drinking excessively on many occasions...breastfeeding while drunk, complaining of always being hungover etc;! I just feel like they don't want to be part of the problem so they are attacking me for shedding light on a sensitive subject.
Does that make sense?

Dee74

Hi Sober Blondie

I think thats a pretty typical FB response - either that or protestations that 'I don't drink that much or that often'.

It's not like SR, and I think you'll save your blood pressure if you remember that

D

dwtbd

What's,Facebook?
Alcohol related problems affect drinkers, nondrinkers just enjoy the effects

Anna

Yes, SoberBlondie, it sure could be that they are being defensive with their responses. I cringe when you talk about breastfeeding drunk.

SimplyFree

I got off FB. It took up my time, gave me lots of stress and anxiety. When I looked at the causes of negativity in my life, FB was a huge contributor. I'm not missing out on anything. Well maybe the post that some clipped their toenails, or fell down drunk, you know the essential knowledge stuff! Lol

SoberBlondie

Feeling much better today after a nice sleep.
I think the lesson here is twofold

1. People's opinions on FB are not relevant to real life!

2. People that make my energy feel negative are probably not meant to be in my life!

Onwards and upwards....Day 28 sober

joandmelandhan

Glad to see you feeling better today SoberBlondie. I see it all over too. The whole "mummy needs her wine" brigade. Seems like it's grown onto it's own kind of sub culture. One which we do well to stay clear of for our own safety. It isn't nice when you try and do a nice thing and feel ridiculed for it I get that but just remember. You've left that behind now. You've wised up about where the slippery slope of "wine o'clock" can end up. This is our safe place and thank goodness we have it. Facebook is full of bravado and rubbish and of course you know that so onward and upward!
Have a great day!

Jules714

I agree, FB is best left alone.
I tell my friends in AA to take a Social Media Diet.
It's not positive to be on there.
I'd rather live than live vicariously.
Think about it, sitting around at home, drinking wine, checking Facebook. Sounds fun. (Enter sarcasm)
GL,
Jules

tomsteve

i didnt know diplomatic and peaceful could co exist.

i think ya learned a good lesson there:
denial can be strong in some.

hpdw

Hiya , I understand what your saying here .
I had a similar frustration and started a thread Off my chest Smoking evil Alcohol Not. some of the responses may be of help , I know they were to me . OH sorry but I am not a beleiver in FB , iv'e saw too much trouble there with the younger generation in my circle . Not a go at you Just that i,m anti FB ( probably my age )

SoberBlondie

Yes, I agree FB can be a problematic forum for stupidity.
I keep my account mainly to keep in touch with friends and family (I moved away from my native country last year).

Either way, I have deleted the two drunk moms who irritated me and I feel better.
We're not going to see eye to eye on this topic, and I don't want people like that in my circle!

Berrybean

Over the summer I deleted a large number of people from my friends list. It was well overdue. Went from nearly 600 to just over 200. There were a couple (friends or friends and some family members haha) who I felt it would be almost inflamatory to remove so I've set them up n there as people whose posts don't come up on my newsfeed, which of course they won't be aware of - tee hee.

Putting things up on social media can be a little like putting yourself in stocks next to a bucket and a tap. Someones likely to react by throwing cold water over it. Perhaps you could set yourself a blog or something up instead of using FB for those things that are personal to you if reseponses like that are going to sting so much. We need to take care of ourselves while we find other peoples opinions painful if we want to ensure the quality of our own sobriety.

Take care.

Wishing you all the best for your recovery and sobriety.

BB

SoberBlondie

Thanks Berrybean for your perspective; this is super true and helpful.

I do have a blog and am working on self-publishing a book as well, so I should just focus on those creative outlets where I can share my feelings in a safer environment!

It's true that my target audience (mostly people who have cut out drinking!) are not high in numbers on FB. I know that it is much more productive to share these kinds of conversations/ideas/thoughts with people who are more likely to appreciate them!

Oh! I'm fairly new here- are we allowed to post links to blogs and/or articles that are relevant to alcohol recovery for discussing?

Thanks team - you guys are great <3