Im back again :(. Need some help
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 89
Im back again :(. Need some help
Hey everyone- im back again 
My husband went to 1month rehab last january. Since being home he has been clean( meth, pain pills, weed). He is on probation and therefore can have random drug tests. Just the past few weeks, his moods have been crazy, completely looses his temper over simple things, screams, punches the wall( all of which has always been a prob in our relationship but obviously worsened last year while he was using). Huge fight today got physical. Avoided him all day until 10:30 tonite. If i hadnt pissed him off none of it would have happened- he said. I asked him if he was using again becausehis eyes were puffy, pupils dialted, and had dry mouth- he sd " F~**^ you!!!! You are the one using!" Theres soooooooooo much more to this story. If u need morebackground please look at my past threads from last year. Help!
My husband went to 1month rehab last january. Since being home he has been clean( meth, pain pills, weed). He is on probation and therefore can have random drug tests. Just the past few weeks, his moods have been crazy, completely looses his temper over simple things, screams, punches the wall( all of which has always been a prob in our relationship but obviously worsened last year while he was using). Huge fight today got physical. Avoided him all day until 10:30 tonite. If i hadnt pissed him off none of it would have happened- he said. I asked him if he was using again becausehis eyes were puffy, pupils dialted, and had dry mouth- he sd " F~**^ you!!!! You are the one using!" Theres soooooooooo much more to this story. If u need morebackground please look at my past threads from last year. Help!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Sorro....You don't have to ask for the answer...I believe that you already know....
They are going to do what they are going to do....you can't control that...
The question, as always, is---what are YOU going to do?
What kind of support do you have?
They are going to do what they are going to do....you can't control that...
The question, as always, is---what are YOU going to do?
What kind of support do you have?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 89
Originally Posted by JK130 
Without knowing the back story, your words tonight are concerning. Are you safe? Do you have a way to get away if you need to? Sending strength to you.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Sorro.....I see that back in May, you let your husband know that if he relapsed..."We are done".
When you make a boundary...it is your responsibility to enforce the boundary...or, it is just empty words.
don't you think it is time or you to leave the situation...for the sake of your self...and, especially, for the kids...this is damaging them in ways that they will carry into their own adult lives......
It is good that you have the support of both families....
You have been suffering through this for a long time...
Some people do go on for years and years, like this....and the damage just gets worse and worse.....
Can you see that this is no way to live....Isn't it time to think about yourself......
When you make a boundary...it is your responsibility to enforce the boundary...or, it is just empty words.
don't you think it is time or you to leave the situation...for the sake of your self...and, especially, for the kids...this is damaging them in ways that they will carry into their own adult lives......
It is good that you have the support of both families....
You have been suffering through this for a long time...
Some people do go on for years and years, like this....and the damage just gets worse and worse.....
Can you see that this is no way to live....Isn't it time to think about yourself......
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: MA
Posts: 157
Originally Posted by dandylion
Sorro.....I see that back in May, you let your husband know that if he relapsed..."We are done".
When you make a boundary...it is your responsibility to enforce the boundary...or, it is just empty words.
You have been suffering through this for a long time...
Some people do go on for years and years, like this....and the damage just gets worse and worse.....
Can you see that this is no way to live....Isn't it time to think about yourself......
When you make a boundary...it is your responsibility to enforce the boundary...or, it is just empty words.
You have been suffering through this for a long time...
Some people do go on for years and years, like this....and the damage just gets worse and worse.....
Can you see that this is no way to live....Isn't it time to think about yourself......
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 89
Originally Posted by manama
No other answer, dandylion. Backstory notwithstanding, no one gets to hit other people with impunity. Even if they are an addict. Forgive him SorrowW22, from a safe distance.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Sorro.....I don't want to speak for Manama....but, I interpret what she said as....sometimes, we have to detach from the relationship....physically and emotionally.....
In order to protect ourselves...We don't have to stop loving or caring...but, we can do so from a distance....
This forum has thousands of real life stories of those of us who have had to do that.....
In order to protect ourselves...We don't have to stop loving or caring...but, we can do so from a distance....
This forum has thousands of real life stories of those of us who have had to do that.....
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