Aquiana

I've been thinking about this all day and I've been wondering if I should say something. I'm not sure if I'm a weirdo or not. The thing is that I'm so happy for my bf on his deciding to quit drinking. I can even hear a difference in the way he talks on the phone. Just a subtle thing, a little more confidence in himself. So here's the weird part. I'm a little scared. It's like I got so used to his drinking and his personalitly good and bad when he drank that his not drinking is a whole new thing. I'm not sure what to expect anymore. I noticed it when I went to visit him last time...I was so nervous. It was like going on a first date! I'm going to pick him up tomorrow and I'm already getting nervous! It's like a whole new dude! I would never want him to go back to drinking and I'm still glad he wants to quit but who knew I'd be this nervous about seeing him. I don't know if I'm afraid he won't need me anymore or what. Weird huh?

Patchwork quilt

I used to feel that way too...
My ex-husband was such a calm and happy guy drinking/drunk that I preferred him drunk/drinking over sober.
I was afraid/dreaded the person he was without his substances. The unknown, especially, scared me...I only knew him with his substances, but not sober.
I know what you mean, I think.

Aquiana

That's what it is! I'm not afraid of how he is when he's sober. He's great that way too. I just have no idea what he's like totally without it. We've been together for almost a year and it's like all of a sudden I'm not sure I'll really "know" him anymore. It'll be a big change for both of us. One thing about him, he's alot more open when drinking. I might even miss his "mushiness". lol That's scary.