Endless Worry
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Where the sun always shines!
Posts: 1,625
Endless Worry
My AH has a car in my name (Stupid move on my part, but I wanted to help AGAIN). He was trashed all weekend and driving that car . My fear is he will be in a wreck, really hurt someone or something, and then I'll be sued because it is my car.
I took my rings off this weekend, I've given up hope on his ability to become sober (that's how I feel today anyway). Although he TALKS about going back to AA and reading his books again - babble, babble, babble
What should I do??
I took my rings off this weekend, I've given up hope on his ability to become sober (that's how I feel today anyway). Although he TALKS about going back to AA and reading his books again - babble, babble, babble
What should I do??
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Texas
Posts: 21
Jessica,
I am new here, day 5. My AH is on day 5 of treatment.
I send my support but I don't think I am qualified to give
any advice yet. I understand your worry. I hope he will
go back to AA and things get better.
ham
I am new here, day 5. My AH is on day 5 of treatment.
I send my support but I don't think I am qualified to give
any advice yet. I understand your worry. I hope he will
go back to AA and things get better.
ham
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Where the sun always shines!
Posts: 1,625
Thanks ham - good luck to you and your husband.
Mine won't even consider "treatment".
I feel like I'm all alone in this. I have a really hard decision in front of me and I don't know if I'm strong enough to make it.
I've been praying for guidance and strength everyday. I feel lost.
Mine won't even consider "treatment".
I feel like I'm all alone in this. I have a really hard decision in front of me and I don't know if I'm strong enough to make it.
I've been praying for guidance and strength everyday. I feel lost.
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: No where
Posts: 79
Jessica
It seems like we all do "stupid" things to help our AHs. Because we love them? I don't know. All I know is that I have done many stupid things in the past. My AH has been sober for almost 4 years now but the in the 15 years before my "stupid" list was neverending. My AH started the program I think when he realized that my list was going to end. I had reached my limit and knew I had to make a decision for me and my family. I didn't threaten I just got stronger. Hope your strength grows strong enough to help you make your decisions. Hang in there.
It seems like we all do "stupid" things to help our AHs. Because we love them? I don't know. All I know is that I have done many stupid things in the past. My AH has been sober for almost 4 years now but the in the 15 years before my "stupid" list was neverending. My AH started the program I think when he realized that my list was going to end. I had reached my limit and knew I had to make a decision for me and my family. I didn't threaten I just got stronger. Hope your strength grows strong enough to help you make your decisions. Hang in there.
Radar
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Colorado Springs
Posts: 199
Jessica, I'm sorry you're going through this. I've been dealing with my Ah for years and I just found out that my son uses drugs. All I know is to turn it over to God and detach from them. They're grown adults and have to figure things out by themselves. I'm not going down with them... :titanic
{tap}{tap}...Is this thing on?
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Getting There
Posts: 276
Jess,
Can you drive the car that it in your name? Is there any reason that he should drive it instead of you? If he must have the car, and my name is on it, I'd take him to the DMV and get the title transferred to his name. http://bmv.ohio.gov/used.html
How to Transfer a Title
Before finalizing the deal and paying for the vehicle, be sure to get all the necessary papers to title your vehicle. You will need the following items:
Odometer Disclosure Statement form filled out and signed by the owner and the buyer (if the car is 10 years old or older you do not need the Federal Odometer Disclosure Statement);
The owner must release his/her ownership in the vehicle. This is done by signing the appropriate space on the title. All persons listed on the title must sign it in the presence of a Notary;
If the title is lost, you may apply for a duplicate title, only in the county where the title was originally issued;
Bill of sale for tax calculation.
When you go to a title office they will assist you in transferring the title.
There is a penalty if the new owner does not change the title into their name within 30 calendar days from the date of assignment. The penalty is $5.00 in addition to all other appropriate fees. So do it soon!
After a vehicle has been titled, you must go to a deputy registrar to obtain a new set of license plates for your vehicle, unless you are transferring plates from another vehicle.
Address those things you can like the car issue. You can't change the drinking issue because it is his.
Good luck today.
Petunia
Can you drive the car that it in your name? Is there any reason that he should drive it instead of you? If he must have the car, and my name is on it, I'd take him to the DMV and get the title transferred to his name. http://bmv.ohio.gov/used.html
How to Transfer a Title
Before finalizing the deal and paying for the vehicle, be sure to get all the necessary papers to title your vehicle. You will need the following items:
Odometer Disclosure Statement form filled out and signed by the owner and the buyer (if the car is 10 years old or older you do not need the Federal Odometer Disclosure Statement);
The owner must release his/her ownership in the vehicle. This is done by signing the appropriate space on the title. All persons listed on the title must sign it in the presence of a Notary;
If the title is lost, you may apply for a duplicate title, only in the county where the title was originally issued;
Bill of sale for tax calculation.
When you go to a title office they will assist you in transferring the title.
There is a penalty if the new owner does not change the title into their name within 30 calendar days from the date of assignment. The penalty is $5.00 in addition to all other appropriate fees. So do it soon!
After a vehicle has been titled, you must go to a deputy registrar to obtain a new set of license plates for your vehicle, unless you are transferring plates from another vehicle.
Address those things you can like the car issue. You can't change the drinking issue because it is his.
Good luck today.
Petunia
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Where the sun always shines!
Posts: 1,625
Thank you for all your support.
Petunia - he has to take his car through e-check before he can get the title transferred. We both need to be at the BMV in order for them to notarize the title. One more little catch - a financial company is holding the title for the car and will only let him take it out for 1 hour to have it transferred. I'm going to keep on him until this gets done, he won't let me do it for him. I can't have this worry hanging over my head. I didn't get any sleep last night, and all I can do today is think about it. I know he's at work and not drinking right now, but what about tonight??
I asked him to let me come up to the bar last night to get the keys, he refused and promised me he'd be walking home. I was stupid enough to believe his promise. I thought he really meant it, because usually he won't say he promises unless he really means it. I guess that's just one more thing to cross off my list of things to believe in.
Petunia - he has to take his car through e-check before he can get the title transferred. We both need to be at the BMV in order for them to notarize the title. One more little catch - a financial company is holding the title for the car and will only let him take it out for 1 hour to have it transferred. I'm going to keep on him until this gets done, he won't let me do it for him. I can't have this worry hanging over my head. I didn't get any sleep last night, and all I can do today is think about it. I know he's at work and not drinking right now, but what about tonight??
I asked him to let me come up to the bar last night to get the keys, he refused and promised me he'd be walking home. I was stupid enough to believe his promise. I thought he really meant it, because usually he won't say he promises unless he really means it. I guess that's just one more thing to cross off my list of things to believe in.
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