iLikeThatWookie

Hi all, I posted a first post a few days ago and I really should have like, idk, stopped drinking and done more to reply to the people who commented on that post. But I didn't. I'm still drinking. I can't seem to stop. And it's way, way out of control. I get drunk, pass out, wake up in d night, drink more, wake up in the morning, begin drinking, drink through the day even at work, drive around drunk all day. That's been going on maybe two weeks, it's a binge. Before that I was mostly sober for maybe five or six months, with intermittent slips that didn't last too long. I'm not even doing it to drink anymore, just to sleep and stave of the physical discomfort of not drinking. I used to be a daily alcoholic, and after mostly quitting for five or six months, it turns out it's really true what they say, it seems to get worse when you're sober so when you go back to it it's worse.

I've been trying to end this scary, scary binge, but I can't. I drink again every time I say I'm stopping. So I signed up to go to rehab on Sunday. Easter here. Ha. It'll be $1,669, which I know my dad can pay. I also know I can take the time off work because my jobs are kind of fake, like they're made up by my dad and my dad's friend so I have income, they're not totally real jobs. Also also, the place I signed up to go to has a variety of things they teach, not just twelve steps, so it could actually help me potentially even though the twelve steps have not helped. Because AA did not help me, and nothing else has, even though I've tried like every single thing there is to try under the sun. So I CAN go to rehab, and maybe it's s good idea since nothing else has worked.

But SHOULD I? Rehab just seems so dramatic. It seems so much on the one hand like, No, you just have to frikking stop drinking and start working a plan again, don't be over dramatic. But on the other hand, I can't stop. And I'm so tired. I don't think I've really slept in ten days. Right now, if I'm not drunk, I can barely walk from how tired I am. Alcohol is like literally propping me up. I am tipsy as I type this. I think maybe 50% of my motivation for going to rehab is, rehab will be a place where they MAKE me stop drinking, and that will mean I can get some real sleep.

And yet still, shouldn't I just stop? When is rehab really the answer?

iLikeThatWookie

Also I should be honest: I'm not new to this site. I made a new username even though I had an old one because I was ashamed and then when the moderators noticed and asked me which one to close I closed for old one. These are all decisions made while drunk, I can't really explain them. Haha. My name was helpimalive. I doubt anyone remembers me or that it matters much, but I figured I'd be honest about it. Haha. Maybe I'll make my icon the same as it was or something.

RushTogether

If there ever was a person rehab was made for, it's you.

You're drinking at work
You're driving around drunk all day
You can't stop
You're not sleeping.

I beg...beg...beg...you to go to rehab this Sunday.

I also beg you not to drive anymore when you're drinking....I get it, I did it too, but what happens when you hit someone? What happens when you kill someone? You kill yourself? Stop now, before you ruin your life, any other lives.

You're clearly powerless over your addiction.
You're clearly reaching out for help.

Get to rehab, get the help you need....before it's too late....

Meraviglioso

My personal opinion is you should go to rehab. I fought the idea of it for years and now that i'm here I wish I had done it sooner. Please, please go read my thread "the rehab report". Please- for you, for your life.

Ariesagain

Go and go with an open mind and stay the entire time. So many things about your post are big red flashing danger signs and if you were less in the grip of alcohol you'd probably see that?

You sound like you're young. For most, alcholism is a progressive disease. You don't want to cut your life in half and spend what time you do have in mental and physical misery.

Go...you're so lucky you can go relatively easily. Get your sweet life back!

Soberwolf

Rehab is a excellent idea

Dee74

I think if you have the opportunity to go, why not?

D

iLikeThatWookie

Because I should be doing something more genuinely productive, is my thinking. Like. Just stop. Don't be so dramatic. Rehab is extremely dramatic. Just stop. And then get a real job and stop being such a screw up.

SansaS

What do you mean by 'get a real job'?

Fabela

If you can just stop, why haven't you done it yet? Can you do it now?

iLikeThatWookie

My jobs are both fake. They're "receptionist" positions where all I have to do is sit at a desk for a while and get paid $13 an hour while I google things and read blogs, because it's at my dad's company and a company owned by my dad's friend. A real job is literally anything not owned or touched upon by my dad. Ha.

Ariesagain

There will nothing more genuinely productive than going to rehab and getting sober. Everything will follow from there, but you have to have that foundation.

If this was just a question of willpower, rehabs wouldn't exist. Alcohol is a powerfully addictive chemical that damages our brains and our bodies and it just happens to be actively pushed by society and the media as being desirable...and it's available everywhere. Those are a lot of factors to overcome, why not get help doing it?

Dee74

Sure - thats fine ...unless the end result is you don't actually do anything, and you keep on drinking.

I'm not casting aspersions by the way - I avoided doing anything for years because I felt I should just have the wherewithal to stop.

In the end I didn't go to rehab, but my drinking did nearly kill me, and that fear was incentive enough to get me sober.

Of course many people never live to seize that second chance.

I'm pretty sure most people who went to rehab didn't want to...they had to.

If you feel that you haven't yet explored all the avenues open to you outside rehab, then explore them by all means, without delay

...but if you find you consistently can't stay sober under your own steam, I think rehab should very definitely be one of your options.

D

OpenTuning

It's not being over dramatic. You just wrote that you're frequently driving drunk, and have been for two weeks straight. If you had any control over your drinking, I'd like to hope you would at least have stayed away from driving where it isn't just your life you're risking, but everyone else unfortunate enough to be on the road at the same time as you. So many people whose lives could be destroyed in an instant by one bad decision by you. There really is nothing overly dramatic about this.

So please go with your first instinct and go to rehab. If you could stop without it, you already would have, wouldn't you? I suspect the voice that's trying to talk you out of it is the part of you that wants to keep drinking, not part of you that is convinced you can quit without doing this. I very much doubt, based on all you've posted, that you believe that really is possible.

RushTogether

Being in jail...or dead, will not help ...

least

Yes, by all means go to rehab. And please stop driving when you've been drinking. You could hurt or kill someone.

shortstop81

Think of it this way - what's the WORST thing that could happen if you went to rehab?

You have everything to gain and nothing to really lose at this point. If you can't 'just stop', how is this being overly dramatic?

BTW I've just made the decision to go to rehab because I'm in a similar situation. I've done AA, I've done individual counselling, I've done outpatient treatment. Rehab is my last stop, but I wish I'd made this decision 10 years ago.

Ananda

I've been where you are.

I believe that if you have never been to rehab and can find a way to do it it is your best option at this point.

Rehab is mostly about staying sober, but they also can help you sort through some of the other stuff you need to in order to stay sober (like the working for dad thing that is driving you up the wall).

If you can find someone in your area who can recommend a good treatment center please do so. In the end no matter where you go it will give you 30 days of sobriety to start building on, and believe me ... a 5 day detox probably will not be enough if you can get 30 days it will really help.

Nands

Soberwolf

Rehab isn't dramatic it's lifesaving one of my sisters is coming up on 4 years sober because of rehab and the other is closing in on 1.5 years thanks to rehab

Everyone I know who has gone to rehab is now doing excellent bud

Not dramatic saving your life or maybe it is question is are you going to try & save your life ?

loulou1981

In a nutshell....yes u should go.

I'm assuming u want to b sober as uve tried numerous times & uve relapsed, don't be ashamed of anything on here, u must c we're not a judgemental bunch!!!!

Speak to ur dad & join the sober train!!!