Grateful
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posts: 81
Grateful
Well today is my 48th birthday and I am 13 days sober. I am so grateful to have made it to today. I truly didn't think I would survive the past year. I am gradually starting to feel better, not great but better. Its made me realize the damage I have done to my body but I have a calmness in knowing that it is healing. My AV was going wild coming up to today. all the usual " you can just have one its your birthday ( yeah right!), you know they give you a free cocktail on your birthday at the local restaurant, why not you deserve it, you are so old what does it matter if you keep drinking etc etc. " But I read here about just shutting it down. Literally yelling NO at the AV and then shifting my mind. It has been really helpful. the last 13 days I have faced major challenges ( I am living with my friends who were also my drinking companions) I have spent nearly every night in my room to stay safe. Also major financial and family issues but I am grateful for my sobriety and have a flicker of hope starting to build. Almost an excitement to see who I am without alcohol. To find myself again. SR has been a huge help to me during this time and I am in awe of the kindness and caring on this site. Thank you 
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,877
Originally Posted by sunshinel 
Well today is my 48th birthday and I am 13 days sober. I am so grateful to have made it to today. I truly didn't think I would survive the past year. I am gradually starting to feel better, not great but better. Its made me realize the damage I have done to my body but I have a calmness in knowing that it is healing. My AV was going wild coming up to today. all the usual " you can just have one its your birthday ( yeah right!), you know they give you a free cocktail on your birthday at the local restaurant, why not you deserve it, you are so old what does it matter if you keep drinking etc etc. " But I read here about just shutting it down. Literally yelling NO at the AV and then shifting my mind. It has been really helpful. the last 13 days I have faced major challenges ( I am living with my friends who were also my drinking companions) I have spent nearly every night in my room to stay safe. Also major financial and family issues but I am grateful for my sobriety and have a flicker of hope starting to build. Almost an excitement to see who I am without alcohol. To find myself again. SR has been a huge help to me during this time and I am in awe of the kindness and caring on this site. Thank you
"Hope dances in the puddles until the sun comes out again".
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 1,601
Happy birthday!! Treat yourself to something yummy....like an ice cream sundae with hot fudge and peanut butter and peanut butter cups! Oh now I am drooling!
Is there any way you can change your living situation? It would be very hard for me to live with people who drank a lot.
Is there any way you can change your living situation? It would be very hard for me to live with people who drank a lot.
totfit
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Ft Collins, CO
Posts: 1,273
Congratulations. If you make it past the 13 day mark on your birthday no less I am certain you "can" make it from now on. Fact is, if a person can do it one day, all they have to do to make it from now on is just continue to wake up and repeat. Happy Birthday.
Happy Birthday.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 295
I also wonder if you can change your living situation. My biggest temptations to drink come from friends who don't get how serious slipping up is for those of us with a drinking addiction. Some of them I think have a problem themselves they just aren't aware of.
Congrats on two weeks of sobriety.
Congrats on two weeks of sobriety
.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posts: 81
Hi everyone I could do with a little help. I've been doing well today and even planned atrip to movies tonight ( haven't been for years) with my friend that I live with. I have just come out of my room and walked outside and he is sitting in the sunshine onto his third beer. I'm craving so badly I want to cry. I just want to go to bed, cancel tonight and spend the night on here but I know he will still want to go to the movies for my birthday but now I feel I can't handle it. Even smelling alcohol on someones breath triggers me, and I can smell the beer from his bottle when I go outside. He won't understand. I want to move but literally do not have any money at the moment. This is my last stop before homelessness. Anyway any reminders of why not to drink would be much appreciated. I've tried telling myself but its just bouncing off tonight. I DO NOT want to drink tonight.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posts: 81
Hi Marcher13. I thought of that but I don't trust myself to go anywhere. I spoke with my friend, cried and explained how hard it is for me. He feels bad but I understand that he can't stop either once he starts. He still wants to go out but I said I would feel safer just hunkering down in my room. He has just gone to get me some Pelligrino water ( while he picks up more beer). I will try to find something on Netflix to distract myself and I will get through tonight. It is just another day, another step towards becoming me again. I desparately want to be a sober and peaceful person and not live with the shame, chaos, and pain of the past.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 314
Originally Posted by sunshinel
Hi Marcher13. I thought of that but I don't trust myself to go anywhere. I spoke with my friend, cried and explained how hard it is for me. He feels bad but I understand that he can't stop either once he starts. He still wants to go out but I said I would feel safer just hunkering down in my room. He has just gone to get me some Pelligrino water ( while he picks up more beer). I will try to find something on Netflix to distract myself and I will get through tonight. It is just another day, another step towards becoming me again. I desparately want to be a sober and peaceful person and not live with the shame, chaos, and pain of the past.
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