Readreadread

I managed to get through a 3 year custody battle with naexh and have been doing well, staying away from drama, etc. I was feeling super lethargic and went to my Dr. and she suggested that I am burnt out.... And now that my life is more calm, bu symptoms are showing. This is my 4th day away from work. I have the worst sinus infection and ear infection that I have ever had. Interesting that I am feeling all of this now. Has this happened to anyone else???? How long does it last where my mody feels normal being calm???

ladyscribbler

It does sound like everything is catching up to you all at once. I've had times where I had to shut down all "nonessential functions" in order to get through something difficult. I also had a protracted custody battle with my ex (only a year though, finally ended in November) and I had that same feeling afterward. Like I should have been doing a happy dance, but all I wanted to do was curl up and cry and sleep for a thousand years.
Thankfully it only lasted a month or so. What really got me through it was lots and lots of self-care. I stayed busy with Alanon meetings, service work, and other things, but I also did therapy and meditation. I wrote in my journal. I made time to eat good meals, to sleep and rest, to take long walks and let myself have the space to feel what I'd been shoving aside and stuffing down just to get through the battle.
The war is over. Time to lay down your weapons and rest.

Liveitwell

I agree with lady-when things are so crazy it feels like each day is a battle to just stay sane and safe! I felt that way for years in my marriage and afterwards for a while. It's hard to let yourself rest when your guard has to always be up ! But-your body is telling you what it needs. I too have found myself really needing time to recoup. I've said no to a few things so that I can really focus on me having some down time (even if it is just a little bit as a single mom). Listen to your body and rest.

hopeful4

It's absolutely understandable that after such a hard time your body and mind be run down and need to recover. Be nice to yourself and take care of yourself. Listen to your body when it says it needs rest, and your mind too.

Take good care of you, you deserve that!

Praying

This has happened to me a couple times in my life. I wonder how I didn't get sick when I couldn't sleep and was so super stressed...then when I could finally sleep and let down (and when I FELT like I was calmer and taking care of myself), I got hammered and felt rotten physically and had some horrible colds and illnesses in close succession.

I think it's nature's way of dipping deep into your reserves to get you through safely. Then when you're "safe", your body goes into recovery mode and you finally realize how far behind you were.

I kind of wanted my manic crazy phase back..,

But it does pass!

Liveitwell

Friend, if it makes you feel any better I am sick now, too. Taking the day off work to try and sleep and recoup. Totally exhausted. I mean in all ways. I think our bodies absolutely hold it together for as long as possible and then just need to rest. I feel like I need a year of rest after what has transpired the last few years. We need to take care if ourselves and listen to our bodies! Peace to you

FireSprite

I went through a lot of health complications in recovery & it took a long time to shake it all out & get myself back to a more solid, stable place. It seemed like as soon as I started to get a handle on Life, my physical body said "OK, I've been running on empty for too long - now, it's MY turn." & it just revolted on me.

All I can say is try to pay attention to the small things that make a difference - adequate sleep, water, vitamins, Dr. checkups, etc. (((((Hugs)))))

Readreadread

Thank you for all the responses, exactly my physical body is screaming. I do need to figure how to take better care of myself and pay attention to my body. I knew I was coming down with something and I didn't put myself first and now 1.5 weeks later I am still paying for it.
Fire - how long did your body revolt?

FireSprite

A while.... like a couple of years from awareness to healthy, I'd say? I was completely depleted, all reserves exhausted & I caught every virus and bug that passed within 5 miles of me, I swear. Even getting healthy was challenging, I'd get one area up & running & get knocked sideways by something else. It's like a long domino chain, you know? I had issues with my hormones, adrenals, blood supply and general health of my blood (too low, anemic), digestion, my thyroid was bad but got worse, more migraines than normal, etc. I had a hard time separating symptoms for a while to even know what belonged to what, lol.

Aquatundra

I like how you mentioned thyroid...what were your symptoms?

I'm soo tired all the time and am having constipation. Just read about thyroid.

FireSprite

Sorry, I forgot to come back to this ^^

Definitely get bloodwork done with your Doc. You need to know not only if your thyroid is "off" but how far out of range & on which side.

That said, *I* have a hypo-thyroid so I supplement with synthroid daily. When it's out of balance I notice odd symptoms like: grit in my eyes in the morning when I wake, morning headaches upon waking, my fingernails split & splinter, are weak. The skin around my cuticles tends to get very dry & just wants to peel up in layers, my fingernails grow oddly - most noticeable in my thumb nail. The "whites" grow oddly, misshapen & curved. And more than any other symptom, I am exhausted on a level that doesn't match my lifestyle. At the worst & when not medicated, my legs literally felt like cement blocks all day, every day.

If you think it's something that you may suffer from, definitely get a proper diagnosis because it's a fairly simple correction that equates to a huge quality of life difference (for me, at least). Good luck!

Praying

I have low thyroid too--diagnosed 17 years ago. I was SO lethargic, like my body weighed a gazillion pounds--and I was a college athlete, so it wasn't lifestyle. I was SO COLD all the time when others weren't. My cycle was completely irregular or absent at times, bowels weren't regular, migraines...I just generally felt unwell most of the time.

I had no idea it was my thyroid--I was off the charts nonexistent in thyroid, and the doc seemed surprised I hadn't gained tons of weight.

One week after supplementation I felt amazingly better. AMAZINGLY. I could get up in the morning much easier.

Through the years it's gotten off again, either high or low--and I've noticed that being "a little low" or "a little high" still has a big impact. The readings don't always correlate with what you're feeling. In fact, I can be "in range" and still not feel well. I have a great doc who listens and is still willing to adjust at those times now that I know my body.

A little high makes my lower body fatigued and heavy like I can't drag it around.

A little low makes my brain foggy and my overall energy levels low.

Either one impacts headaches and general yuck. Both impact cycle and bowels--either ratcheting it up or shutting it down.

My weight goes up a little with either misalignment, and I'm more prone to headaches. And I'm still sensitive to the cold, though to a lesser degree.

Maybe TMI, but I hope it helps! Our thyroid regulates just about everything.

wanttobehealthy

I feel like you are describing me. I am exhausted to a degree that I can not even describe. People at work are asking me daily if I am ok. I look worse than I feel and am drained like I have some debilitating illness...

I would have thought that after making out alive from my own 4+ year custody/divorce battle with a NPD/A/Abuser ex, I would have felt relief...

Instead I feel like I am dragging myself through every minute of every day...

I think that surviving on adrenaline for years and years and having that fight or flight response active 24:7 and then suddenly ending, may have something to do with this for us both....

I just wanted to say that YES I do know precisely how you feel and I can empathize!

JLOBYXMAS

Count me in, after 5 years of turmoil, and now that AXH is now away in rehab, my body feels awful, add to that my Lupus and it's hard to determine what is real, what is psychosomatic, what is lupus related, what is anemia related, and what is just sheer exhaustion.
Sleep when you need to, eat when you need to, exercise if you want to. Take the time to let your body and mind heal...at least that's what I'm trying to do.

cricket123

I logged on today to ask the same question. I am away from the drama and over all doing much better. However I seem to be sick about once a month where I have to take a day off of work. (its paid so I'm not worried about that) I do have an appointment with the doctor later this month so hopefully I'll figure it out.

Liveitwell

I kind of liken it to when the alcoholic gives up drinking - I've heard it's common for them to get sick more often at first-bc their body is readjusting. I feel like giving up my DOC, my abusive alcoholic, my body is readjusting-after living in a adrenaline 24-7, oh my God what is he doing, are my kids ok, keep him away from the kids, what did you just say to me, please stop doing that-it hurts....that was my normal day?! Wtf-of course our bodies are readjusting. We are cleaning out the toxins-of a life with an alcoholic.