Tyj008

Hi there,

Ive posted on here before and its been 6 months since ive seen my A boyfriend. We would text and talk about his "recovery" but he wouldnt see me. I asked him if he thinks we would ever see each other again and he says of course because he has feelings too. Anyway a week or so later both my friend who he works woth and my manager at work tell me they have drunk with him at a bar over the last few weekends.

I was upset because i half way believed him about recovery. But thought it was fishy that he wasnt ready to see me.

My cousin is and A and she told me he is hiding from me bc he is still drinking. It made so much since that i didnt want to believe it. So I asked him if he was still drinking.

Now...i wouldnt be mad if he said yes because that is a good sign of acceptance and wanting to fix it(ive been educating myself and alanon meetings) but he lied and said no. I comfronted him on the lie and told him he can stop hiding from me. He spazzed and told me this is the best his life has ever been? (Then why lie) then he says dont worry about a person who is not in my future but then we will be friends( contradiction)

I was hurt but alsp relieved bc I understand that he just isnt ready to quit and has nothing to do with me or another woman(thank god lol)

A couple of weeks later i was at grandmothers funeral (im rhe worst at funerals bc they remind me of my mothers im working on not taking them personally) and had a moment of weekness and texted him how angry i was that he couldnt be here for me but that it wasnt his fault. And we both need to stop being victims of our lives. And that everything will be ok.

That was over a month ago with no response. I finally miss him without being worried or angry. I told him he could share the funeral with my grandmother because until he feels like quiting it is his funeral (in my brain)

I still want to support him anyway i can. Ive been through my own recovery, thanks to Jesus I am becoming a new woman with old scars.
Thanks for reading. How do i support him with ignoring me?

happybeingme

You don't. You have no place in his life. You haven't seen him in six months and now it has been a month since you have spoken to him. I think it is time to take the hint and move on.

BriarSkye

Sad but true.

CodeJob

Pray for him, which I imagine you already do.

Ariesagain

I'm truly sorry, but this relationship is over. He'll probably keep you on a back burner if you let him, because addicts need multiple backup plans, but it's meaningless.

Let him go, wish him well, and get on with your own precious life.