The Ghosts of Xmas Past . . .
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
The Ghosts of Xmas Past . . .
Well it’s just past midnight here in Ireland, it’s officially Xmas, though as it is my tradition I’ve just finished wrapping gifts, this year my sister and brother in law are spending Xmas here for the first time since getting married, the dynamic is going to be new, but things are relaxed, we’re all heading around to my mum's house tomorrow afternoon for dinner, and I’ll do the traditional visit of my dad’s family tomorrow morning.
I’m definitly not the biggest Xmas fan by any stretch, my parent’s splitting when I was young I think affected that, but life goes on, it was only when I got Sober that the past could be put to rest, so many years of anger, frustration, simply going through the motions, I remember many years when everyone got a gift voucher as a gift, I was the king of no nonsense, the path of least resistance Xmas cheer, bah humbug,
But Sobriety brought a change in attitude, I became once again in control of my own life, I was able to address my past, the demons, the frustrations, the contempt I had for Xmas based on my perception that everyone else had a family structure to feel safe within, the vision of the family Xmas that I couldn’t see in my own life.
Many years on, things have changed, I’ve just finished wrapping gifts, and yes that means actual presents for people, I now buy meaningful gifts, not the default number of gift vouchers required, tomorrow I will wake up hangover free, there will be no feeling of not trying to throw up at the table, the feeling of regrets the next day, the feeling of trying to pass Xmas as quick as possible, I used to feel that if Xmas never happened it would be no lose to me, but that was the selfish me, always looking out for myself and not realizing that others around me want to enjoy it, who am I to walk over that?
Now I take each holiday for what they are, a time to get together with people, spend time, good conversation, last year I even remember breaking out a few board games, I still have no idea what most people do on Xmas, but these last few years I’ve had fun, I’ve enjoyed myself, I’ve gotten to know my family better, I now have happy memories that I can share and remember.
There are possibly people reading this feeling exactly the same way, and that’s fine, I’ve been there, and that was my reality for a long time, but give Sobriety a chance, it’s a great foundation to build a life upon, to even build a happier Xmas upon.
I want to wish everyone here on SR a Merry Xmas, Happy Holidays and, much joy and happiness entering the New Year, there are too many names to mention, you all know who you are, many have touched my life and many others here on SR!!
The ghosts of my Xmas past have finally been put to rest . . .
PK
I’m definitly not the biggest Xmas fan by any stretch, my parent’s splitting when I was young I think affected that, but life goes on, it was only when I got Sober that the past could be put to rest, so many years of anger, frustration, simply going through the motions, I remember many years when everyone got a gift voucher as a gift, I was the king of no nonsense, the path of least resistance Xmas cheer, bah humbug,
But Sobriety brought a change in attitude, I became once again in control of my own life, I was able to address my past, the demons, the frustrations, the contempt I had for Xmas based on my perception that everyone else had a family structure to feel safe within, the vision of the family Xmas that I couldn’t see in my own life.
Many years on, things have changed, I’ve just finished wrapping gifts, and yes that means actual presents for people, I now buy meaningful gifts, not the default number of gift vouchers required, tomorrow I will wake up hangover free, there will be no feeling of not trying to throw up at the table, the feeling of regrets the next day, the feeling of trying to pass Xmas as quick as possible, I used to feel that if Xmas never happened it would be no lose to me, but that was the selfish me, always looking out for myself and not realizing that others around me want to enjoy it, who am I to walk over that?
Now I take each holiday for what they are, a time to get together with people, spend time, good conversation, last year I even remember breaking out a few board games, I still have no idea what most people do on Xmas, but these last few years I’ve had fun, I’ve enjoyed myself, I’ve gotten to know my family better, I now have happy memories that I can share and remember.
There are possibly people reading this feeling exactly the same way, and that’s fine, I’ve been there, and that was my reality for a long time, but give Sobriety a chance, it’s a great foundation to build a life upon, to even build a happier Xmas upon.
I want to wish everyone here on SR a Merry Xmas, Happy Holidays and, much joy and happiness entering the New Year, there are too many names to mention, you all know who you are, many have touched my life and many others here on SR!!
The ghosts of my Xmas past have finally been put to rest . . .
PK
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
For us, this sober stuff is a revalation. What is scary, I think a lot of normies or non drinkers figured this stuff out a long time ago but I'm a firm believer in better late than never
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 507
Well done for getting your presents wrapped by midnight. 2am for me
I'm feeling a bit smug right now. Had friends over for Christmas Eve meal. They and my wife drank. I didn't. My wife has had a hangover all morning while the kids were shrieking with excitement. I haven't. Life is good
I'm feeling a bit smug right now. Had friends over for Christmas Eve meal. They and my wife drank. I didn't. My wife has had a hangover all morning while the kids were shrieking with excitement. I haven't. Life is good
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