rl41

Hey guys, having a bit of a rough time of it. Just moved in with my boyfriend last week which I thought would make me quit drinking altogether but had a bad day yesterday (been ill with flu) and he went back to his mums house and didn't come back till late afternoon. I wouldn't mind but he said he'd be back early to check I was okay after lunch. It ended up in an argument where I told him to go. Thankfully he didn't. That's been our first fight together. I've tried to explain to him about my depression but he doesn't understand and puts his mum first. He pays his mum £200 a month plus extra money plus her mortgage money. I've thought about asking him who would come first but I'm scared for the answer. He goes around there all day Sunday which he says isn't much but he also spends time after work on Saturday there too.
I just do t know what to do, although alcohol just makes it worse I know. It scares me though the thought of not having a drink in the evening.
Any advice?

stevepearce

Hi rl41. I'm no expert but I would say that you need to focus on stopping drinking first and then see about you relationship, which by the way may well change when you do. And yeah the thought of not drinking can be scary. But it is possible. Many on here have achieved it. All the best. Sending you strength and love.

Carver

Hi!

Your bf is still adjusting to living in a new place, maybe just chill and give it time

Quit drinking first, we can help you with that

Soberwolf

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html

rl41

Thanks guys, in bed thankful to be laid here sober. :-)

Dee74

Hi rl

I'm sorry you're unwell. Have you though about building a support network?

Check out the Class of November support thread - it's new and you can get in on the ground floor before it gets big

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-2015-a-2.html

D

rl41

Thanks Dee, will join the support thread. Doing this without people knowing I have a problem so support from you guys is so much appreciated,

Rach

Soberwolf

Wishing you the best today Rach

rl41

Thank you sober wolf, woke up hangover free so feeling thankful. I just hope I stay strong enough through the weekend

tomsteve

welp,ya may not like this. i read really old me.
making sobriety dependant on a relationship is a design for failure. depending on others to stay sober is a design for failure.
taking hostages and setting reansoms is a design for failure.
expecting others to understand my mental and emotional problems is a design for failure.


advise?
take responsibility for your recovery and your life.
the fear of not having a drink will disappear if ya work at loving yourself and living life.