Plink

on Saturday because he did not follow up with his meetings or contact his probation officer of where he was living. So he is currently sitting in the county jail.

I just do not understand how he could do this again! When he left jail he said he NEVER wanted to go back there. He was in jail for 6 weeks and Rehab for 3 he had to be clean! All he had to do was follow up with his probation officer and he would not be where he is now!

His sisters (3) are so hurt and disappointed. They can't believe he would go back to this life.

We had family day at the Rehab on the Sunday before he got out and everything he said to us and his daughter was so promising!

But, we have been told by the interventionist (who is still working with us) that we have to hold our grounds and not give in no matter how heart wrenching this is.

This has to be the hardest thing a family can go through.

Well, that's the basis of my story and why I am here.....

LiveItFull

i stayed at hospital 5 times in the past and every time when i went out of the hospital i started drinking again and again. Alcoholism is like this. It's uncontrollable if you don't really want to stay sober. It's not related to free will and giving promises.

Roxyblues

This may not make it any better, but he is probably doing the best he can do with were he is at at this point in his life. A normal person can go crazy trying to make sense of addiction and an addicts behavior. Makes total sense to me because I have been mired in the insanity of addiction many times. The only thing you can do as loved ones of someone battling addiction is take care of yourself and pray for your son to make it through this.

Soberwolf

Welcome Plink youl find a ton of support here

brynn

Welcome plink!

I'm so sorry for the pain you and your family are experiencing right now. It truly is heart wrenching to watch someone you love destroy themselves.

As a former alcoholic/addict, I can tell you that I continued doing the most ludicrous, crazy things in order to feed my addiction. My addiction was all I could see and the need to feed it was all-consuming. I continued feeding it even after losing my career, my nursing license, landing in jail, etc.. I continued destroying my life even when horrible things happened. But that's what addiction makes us do. It makes us act abnormally and do crazy things.

No one could make me stop. I had to come to the realization ON MY OWN that I was spiraling pretty quickly toward death for real change to occur. I had to want to quit. I had to want a new life.

I pray your son has a lightbulb moment very soon. Just remember it's not too late for him. As long as he's alive it's never too late.
Xo

sugarbear1

Right now, it's not a choice....he needs to really want to get well.

Sending you love and hugs

Plink

Thank you for all the replies and warm welcome.

What we can't understand is how you can be clean for months and as soon as your able to go back to using?????

brynn

The pull of his drug of choice is incredibly strong. I've been sober almost a year and I hear booze calling my name frequently. He might have been clean just to please his family or the courts and so maybe his choice for those few months wasn't motivated by a true desire to change. As soon as he had the opportunity...right back to it.
Also, it's not just about taking the drugs out of your life. You must be willing to make drastic lifestyle changes...new friends, hobbies, etc...in order to get out of the rut of using all day every day. Our lives were consumed with it. Without our booze or drugs there's just a big void that must be filled.
Addiction and the actions of addicts is baffling to family and friends.

Hevyn

It's good to meet you, Plink. I'm so sorry for what you & your family are going through.

I had 3 yrs. sober once & decided I could be a social drinker. I was sure I'd never allow myself to get carried away again. Once it's in our system, all our determination leaves us. Anything can happen. That is what I finally had to realize - even one drink can lead us back to hell. Often, a relapse results in another try with lasting success. Please let us know how things are going.

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Plink!!

Anna

That's actually very easy to understand. You see, stopping the drinking or drugs is only the beginning. It does not solve the problem. In fact, that's when the hard work begins and for many of us, it's really hard to face all the messes we've made and all the issues that brought us to addiction.

I hope that your son will find his way.

Jsbodhi

(((( hug)))) welcome.
Like the others have said, his behaviour makes perfect sense to me, but to a non addict seems crazy
Xoxo

tomsteve

there could be many reasons why. one being he was only doing the rehab to get people off his back,which imo is what im reading. he had untreated addiction-took away the drugs but no change.

to keep it simple addicts/alcoholics do it because they are sick.

im very glad your here. you will find great wisdom and support and suggestions here.
please know,though, that all of that wont be how to get him clean.
it will be to help you and your family keep the blinders off,stop enabling, and live.

if you keep enabling you may love him to death.
learn how to stop enabling, let him seek help and get clean,
then love him to life.

least

I'm sorry for what brings you here, but welcome to the family.