anniecake

Everyday it seems like I get some nice new delivery of bad news. Today in the mail we got a letter from unemployment saying that my husband's work is contesting it because he was fired. Is that true even though he was fired for drinking and alcoholism is supposed to be a medical disease? Does anyone know anything about disability?
I'm having a difficult time keeping my mind off of my husband. Today is his first full day in detox. I left him there about 10:30 last night. He only went with the clothes on his back. I have packed a bag for him (they told me what I could bring) but I haven't been able to go yet. Should I wait a bit, run it over tonight? I find myself afraid that he is going to walk out. Would someone notify me if he did that?
I just came back from talking with his parents and brother and letting them know the situation. It was very difficult, they had no idea. They were wonderful and supportive. Now I have to explain to my kids. Any advice?

redrose0729

I would take him his things if he is willing to go for help I would support him in that. The kids well if it were me I would probally tell them that daddy is sick and he has to stay in the hospital for a little while so he can get better. I wouldn't lie to them but I wouldn't make it sound harsh. The unemployment thing depends on what happened when they terminated him if he was intoxicated on the job and they can prove that then he will loose. If they have already ruled in his favor the chances of it being overturned are not good. In past experiences the first decision usually sticks. Employers have to follow strict guidelines when terminating someone if they do not want to pay unemployment benifits. There is a process they have to go through and also they must state specific reasons in the company handbook given prior to employment that can cause immediate dismissal if your husband directly violated on of the company rules in the handbook then he could be denied. Know this God knows the your needs and the needs of your family seek him out and he will take care of you and show you the way to make it back on your feet. Just remember to keep knocking on the doors that you need to because God may not open them if you don't make the effort to knock and right now it seems like you are knocking pretty loud .

amarie

We live in New York State and when my husband lost his job he was denied unemployment right away because he was fired. He was able to collect after 7 weeks, but then entered detox and rehab. He then lost his benefits because he was in rehab and was unable to look for employment. He was not able to resume benefits and didn't find a job for 6 months. We ended up filing chapter 13 bankruptcy that has been finally paid off and discharged. It's very hard to collect disabilty even though alcoholism is a disease. There really isn't any leniency when it comes to alcoholism. The courts don't recognize it as a debilitating disease. They feel it is a matter of choice. In a way they are right. You have a choice whether or not to pick up that drink. You don't choose whether or not to get cancer.

Magichappens

Hey annie,
I know this is a scary thing, but those questions you are asking are things that he needs to deal with. You have no control over them. What you can do is begin to start taking care of you. There are many things that you can do to begin this process. Deciding what to do about making sure you have a place to live, and food to eat is probably top on that list. Next is beginning to get some emotional support. Al-Anon meetings are free and they can help you to deal with what's going on. Bottom line is that you can waste time worrying about what he is going to do, when there is no solution in that, or you can start taking care of yourself. You don't have to do it alone. There is a lot of love and support from people who have been there and have found solutions. To find an Al-Anon meeting in your area, http://www.al-anon-alateen.org/english.html and select "How to locate a meeting." Hugs, Magic