TheCrimsonKing

I received a phone call from Carmen the weekend before last and she commented on how upbeat, perky and positive I sounded. I agreed and reflected on the reason...ULTIMATE SELF-CARE...

On top of being teetotal....I was exercising in the morning before work, something I love as I get my free feel good drugs early in the morning and the day starts off fantastic. I was eating well and regularly...I normally have a high metabolism, especially when exercising and need to eat 5 times per day....all of my proteins had been bought and frozen for the week, been taken out as needed....organisation.....plenty of fruit and veg......I was contributing to each of my goals.....working productively......social life goals been met.....early rising....surviving on 5 hours sleep.....THE RIPPLE EFFECT going in the right direction....I was feeling great because my actions were in conjunction with my goals.....my planet was aligned......emotions happy and flying along nicely....

Then Saturday I chose to drink.....I didn't get that initial first buzz that some people talk about......I get a deadening affect as if I have taken a valium..........then THE RIPPLE EFFECT started to change direction.....Mogwai had just had water spilled upon him and slowly the gremlins started to stir...soon they would run amok....it's amazing how quickly alcohol envelops me with a cloak of sadness......maybe it's not so amazing...as alcohol is afterall, a depressant......and I have to take into account that I am very sensitive to my physical condition.....very sensitive to depressants put into my stystem...quickly I descend into the pit...scenes of torture....there's blood in the air....the dead pull at me.....I was lost in the evil of the night.....I had no business being there......this had nothing to do with my goals....this was not self care......what happens in the evil of the night comes back in flashes the next day to haunt me like a curse...........negative things, the negative spiral......and THE RIPPLE EFFECT continues in the wrong direction.......my emotions aware that my actions are not congruent with my life goals and my purpose start to scream like the damned souls of hell screaming their heads off, awakened from a slumber and not happy about it........wailing, tearing at their own disheveled hair.......I stop consuming the poison but THE RIPPLE EFFECT continues in the wrong direction the following the day.......something is wrong.....my appetite is gone....my appartment is dirty....grimy....the beasts had left but they had left their filth and grim on my floor and ceiling.....something's hanging in the air....my routine is turned on it's head.......my goals fall by the wayside.....THE RIPPLE EFFECT continues it's slide going the wrong way on a one way street......some positive actions are needed but it's an effort.......it will take a full week before I manage to get the waves of THE RIPPLE EFFECT to turn back in the right direction......I will do it....slowly but surely.......

I will get it flowing in the right direction....THE RIPPLE EFFECT of accumalated daily positive actions.....

Then that first drink will call again...
and I'll need to remember this post. I'll need to remember what effect it will have on my positive flow.....and say NO. No, thanks, no. Not for me.

The Scotty fella mentioned 'play if forward'....I'm playing it back, in order to play it forward in the future...
The Dee fella mentioned a black wolf and a white wolf......(negative ripple and a positive ripple)
Good tools.

No, no thanks no. Mon dernier verre, je l'ai vidé...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-OUY5Imzis