the end is near
s macy
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: LAFAYETTE, INDIANA
Posts: 1
the end is near
hi everyone. i am new to this site so i'm not sure what i am doing.
my husband, who is a wonderful caring man has a drinking problem. he has drank for about 30 yrs. but is getting progressively worse. i hate to see what alcohol is doing to this man. his clothes hang on him, he has bags under his eyes so large that i could pack for a weekend and feels hungover most weekends and has to drink to make him feel better.
i have cried, begged and threatened but to no avail. i usually am a very strong person, but 3 weeks ago it got to me and i ended up in the er. i don't want to leave him. i can't imagine my life without him.
his work has a great program and sent him to an evaluation center and is now taking treatment programs. he did fine for 2 weeks then rewarded himself with a couple of drinks. he says he wants to quit, but i have my doubts.
almost there
my husband, who is a wonderful caring man has a drinking problem. he has drank for about 30 yrs. but is getting progressively worse. i hate to see what alcohol is doing to this man. his clothes hang on him, he has bags under his eyes so large that i could pack for a weekend and feels hungover most weekends and has to drink to make him feel better.
i have cried, begged and threatened but to no avail. i usually am a very strong person, but 3 weeks ago it got to me and i ended up in the er. i don't want to leave him. i can't imagine my life without him.
his work has a great program and sent him to an evaluation center and is now taking treatment programs. he did fine for 2 weeks then rewarded himself with a couple of drinks. he says he wants to quit, but i have my doubts.
almost there
We all need each other.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The road of happy destiny.
Posts: 2,294
Hello, Sharon--and welcome to SR!!! It sounds like you are having a pretty tough time. The thing you must remember is that your husband WILL NOT be able to quit until he really wants to, regardless of what you or his employers do. I know this because I am an alcoholic.
Check out the Al-anon and Friends and Family boards on this site. There you will find a LOT of good people who can completely relate to you and your situation. I would also suggest seeking out Al-anon meetings in your area.
Others will be along shortly to welcome you and share their experience, strength and hope.
Hugs to you--
Check out the Al-anon and Friends and Family boards on this site. There you will find a LOT of good people who can completely relate to you and your situation. I would also suggest seeking out Al-anon meetings in your area.
Others will be along shortly to welcome you and share their experience, strength and hope.
Hugs to you--
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: El Paso, Tx
Posts: 5,862
Hi and welcome!
I'm sorry your husband has to struggle with this. Believe me I'm sure he has his own inner turmoil and fights this everyday. Some give up, and feel they are resigned to this way of life. Keep up the faith and hope that he'll eventually have the courage and strength to continue with treatment and find a way to deal with this.
In the meantime, visit our Friends and Family forum for support for you!
I'm sorry your husband has to struggle with this. Believe me I'm sure he has his own inner turmoil and fights this everyday. Some give up, and feel they are resigned to this way of life. Keep up the faith and hope that he'll eventually have the courage and strength to continue with treatment and find a way to deal with this.
In the meantime, visit our Friends and Family forum for support for you!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Hey Sharon,
It's very hard to watch someone you love self-destruct. And you can cry, beg and threaten all you want, but he's not going to get it until HE gets it.
That trip to the ER should be a big red flag that this is all getting to you in a serious way.
I'm sure that you love him and you want to see him recover.
That isn't going to happen until he wants it.
Now, try to take the focus off of him and put it on you.
Coming here was a great first step.
Have you thought about going to Alanon meetings? That is a great way to meet people who are dealing with similar issues. Come on down and join us on the Family and Friends board and the Naranon board. There are people there who understand what you're going through.
Hugs,
Gabe
It's very hard to watch someone you love self-destruct. And you can cry, beg and threaten all you want, but he's not going to get it until HE gets it.
That trip to the ER should be a big red flag that this is all getting to you in a serious way.
I'm sure that you love him and you want to see him recover.
That isn't going to happen until he wants it.
Now, try to take the focus off of him and put it on you.
Coming here was a great first step.
Have you thought about going to Alanon meetings? That is a great way to meet people who are dealing with similar issues. Come on down and join us on the Family and Friends board and the Naranon board. There are people there who understand what you're going through.
Hugs,
Gabe
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