beginning day 4
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 245
beginning day 4
Recently rejoined (in a sense). Never posted before and was never really on the site much. I guess I didn't have genuine interest at the time. Not much to get into at the moment other than I am beginning this day with a better outlook on life (in the mist of all the damage I've caused over the years).
I've been reading posts and responses to those in need of help with this destructive addiction and it is good to see a community of people that are concerned about those like them.
Brief little history on me: Currently 30; first drink was 18, remained a casual/ social drinker for 5 years; became a little more frequent around 24 25 years old. Since then I have had binge stints that would last 3 days to 2 weeks drinking 8-9 drinks a night. After felt like trash in all aspect, mental, my body, my spirit, etc. and would go with not drink for a couple days, couple weeks.
As of these past 2 years my view on life was that I was just gonna be stuck with this binge cycle. These past years had been tough for me personally watching my grandma, grandpa and great aunt slow fade away in the hospital. My grandma died a week before Thanksgiving 2013, my great aunt a week later and my grandpa in February 2014. For him we had to make a decision on taking him off life support.
This is no excuse for drinking and cause adding problems in my life. I'm beginning to understand that now. It was very tough on me though because I sincere care about people in general and most definitely my family, whether they believe it not.
Anyways, I know its a lot of text for a post. Just wanted to give people a bit of life story on me. I'm glad a forum like this exist. Have a good day!
I've been reading posts and responses to those in need of help with this destructive addiction and it is good to see a community of people that are concerned about those like them.
Brief little history on me: Currently 30; first drink was 18, remained a casual/ social drinker for 5 years; became a little more frequent around 24 25 years old. Since then I have had binge stints that would last 3 days to 2 weeks drinking 8-9 drinks a night. After felt like trash in all aspect, mental, my body, my spirit, etc. and would go with not drink for a couple days, couple weeks.
As of these past 2 years my view on life was that I was just gonna be stuck with this binge cycle. These past years had been tough for me personally watching my grandma, grandpa and great aunt slow fade away in the hospital. My grandma died a week before Thanksgiving 2013, my great aunt a week later and my grandpa in February 2014. For him we had to make a decision on taking him off life support.
This is no excuse for drinking and cause adding problems in my life. I'm beginning to understand that now. It was very tough on me though because I sincere care about people in general and most definitely my family, whether they believe it not.
Anyways, I know its a lot of text for a post. Just wanted to give people a bit of life story on me. I'm glad a forum like this exist. Have a good day!
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome to "active" posting and thanks for sharing your story TNTStill. Making the decision to quit at a younger age is fantastic, you have your whole life ahead of you. It is definitely tough finding ways to deal with our lives minus the alcohol, but it is not only possible it's a better way to live. Don't be a stranger, there is a lot of support to be found here.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: BC Canada
Posts: 228
I'm on day 4 just like you 
And I really get how you said, you sincerely care about your family even though they don't believe it. I had good intentions when I would drink (at least I thought so). I wasn't deliberately going out to hurt the ones I love by drinking, but the honest truth, it does hurt them.
I'm glad you are here. How are you feeling today?
I have a bit of anxiety, and yes at times, do wish I could have a drink, but sticking to being sober a moment at a time.
And I really get how you said, you sincerely care about your family even though they don't believe it. I had good intentions when I would drink (at least I thought so). I wasn't deliberately going out to hurt the ones I love by drinking, but the honest truth, it does hurt them.
I'm glad you are here. How are you feeling today?
I have a bit of anxiety, and yes at times, do wish I could have a drink, but sticking to being sober a moment at a time.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 245
Thanks for the welcome and @Ruby2, finding a supportive community of people that have been through this is helpful for me. I've had my experience in different venue when the environment and atmosphere of conversation was always so negative. It was kinda of a turn off. People want to be sober but then they talk about "F this and F that and F my life". I can do that on my own and make things worse (which is what happens when alcohol is introduced). Just from reading a few threads and responses I like the direction and approach the majority of people are taking.
Its refreshing to see. So that is helpful for me. thanks!
Its refreshing to see. So that is helpful for me. thanks!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 245
Cool, yeah a little anxiety here too but I'm a bit better at the moment. Been job searching (started to hate my previous job and didn't give a **** a month ago and lost it, of course due to a drink). But not mad about, that doesn't help.
I've been studying to be a personal trainer (freelancing it) and I'm trying to get the few clients I had back into that fell off. Its something I like to do and I'm pretty good at it. So pursuing that has given me an emotional uplift.
I've been studying to be a personal trainer (freelancing it) and I'm trying to get the few clients I had back into that fell off. Its something I like to do and I'm pretty good at it. So pursuing that has given me an emotional uplift.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Welcome to the posting side of SR TNTStill. As you've figured out, there's a ton of support here 24/7. My first few months, I spent a ton of time here. The more I was engaged with this community, the more committed I was to being sober.
Stay strong!
Stay strong!
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