JimdiGriz

Well I drank yesterday. Not a lot, and managed to resist cravings to slam a lot more on the way home, got there in time to say goodnight to my little boy, and still sane.

Having not drunk for , what, 2-3 weeks, Im trying not to count days, I was very aware of my thoughts and feelings and particularly feelings of inferiority. Yesterday afternoon I bumped into an old girlfriend who is obviously doing well, then walked back through the Eurostar concourse to catch my train, surrounded by all these glamorous business travellers, dark suits and boots, shuttling on executive class to well planned, well lit, tidy , and profitable lives. And I felt soooo inferior by comparison; scrabbling to make a living, teaching and feeling a fraud, unable to cope with the various demands of home, medical and work, I'm debt, house falling apart and in a bad state of repair ...good grief. Looked to all the coffee bars but they were stacked with London crowds and just couldn't bear the crowded cold long ride home.

Anyway that was me: greatful I could catch those thoughts, sad I drank, sorry to let sr down, but back sober and lucid today

I suppose my question is does anyone else have similar feelings, and how do you cope with them ?

Dee74

Judging your insides against everyone else's outsides is always going to be a losing bet Jim...the real facts are you have no idea what struggles other people might have, yeah?

Drinkign doesn;t change anything either. The only real way to change your life and your future is abstinence - try and zero in on that next time the inner addict starts in on you

D

Treerat66

^^^^ This^^^^