GoodGhost9

Hello everyone, I was on this forum almost two years ago. I wanted to quit drinking for good, and I stopped completely for 10+ months because right when I found this board, I found out I was pregnant. It was really easy giving up drinking both times I was pregnant. I don't know why I can't do it for myself. I have two small kids and while I don't drink around them, I don't want them to be subject to it in any way. I grew up in a house where neither parent drank. No one drank around me, actually. I started drinking when I was 17 because my friends and I hung out in a crowd of people who all drank. I didn't really realize it back then, but I have pretty bad social anxiety and I drank because I was too shy to talk to anyone unless I was drinking or drunk. I stopped hanging out in that crowd after a year or two but I dated someone for five years who drank a lot. After I broke up with him I started dating my current boyfriend who also drinks. I'm about 30 now and I drink once or twice a week but when I do drink, it's usually a lot and I get really drunk. I won't remember parts of the night sometimes.

I'm just really tired of drinking. Nothing really bad happened to make me want to stop but I'm sick of it and I don't want anything really bad to happen. I probably would have stopped a long time ago but my boyfriend has no intention of stopping completely. It's hard to not drink when someone else drinks several nights a week. I don't really want to go to AA or anything because I'm not religious and I heard that it is very God-oriented so I hope reading this forum will help.

I didn't even want to drink last night but my boyfriend was at a bar for a party and I figured I better go out to get him. I ended up drinking and getting really drunk; the bartender cut us off and called us a cab. My car is still at the bar and I have no idea where my phone is; my boyfriend accidentally broke his phone. I'm glad nothing worse happened and really glad no one drove home but all of this could be easily prevented if I would just stop drinking. I feel terrible today and I'm tired of wasting entire days doing nothing while being hungover. I know I have to do it for my health and especially for my kids but I guess it's harder for me than I thought. Drinking has just always been in my adult life and it totally does not need to be. Thanks for reading my long story and any comments or suggestions would be appreciated.

margherita

Hello Good Ghost, I really think you should try AA. I am not religious at all (I am an atheist), but AA has helped me TREMENDOUSLY. Not so much the God-related stuff, but just hearing the stories of and interacting with all the other alcoholics has given me incredible hope. It made me feel not so lonely, like I am the only one who's going through this hard time and showed me that there's a way out of this misery. And just feeling understood and not judged or ridiculed or made fun of for my addiction. I would be glad to talk to you more about this.

What do you have to lose by going to a couple of different AA meetings and see how you feel about it?

IOAA2

Hi.
I’ve been active in AA for many years and the God you refer is Yours. I and many are not religious but have our own and often call it Our Higher Power or Spirit. Very seldom in my area have I heard a denominational God mentioned. In fact it’s against our Traditions.

“AA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither endorses nor opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.”BE WELL

PurpleKnight

Welcome back Ghost!!

Soberwolf

Nice to meet you Ghost

Lusher

Hey GoodGhost9, I just wanted to throw out some support as well. It seems as if you realize there's a problem, and you're doing something about it. That's a big step!

I know it's hard when your partner drinks. When I first stopped, I did not ask my girl to stop, but it did annoy me when she did. Not so much because of any big temptations, but more because it sort of conflicted with how I was trying to change my entire lifestyle and surroundings. (She subsequently did as well, thankfully.)
I think the above quote is key, and if you are set on stopping for good, then you might have to face the reality of how much more difficult that will be with your boyfriend's desire to continue, and perhaps make some tough decisions.

Anna

Welcome back, Ghost!

There are many paths to recovery, so take a look around and see what we do.

It sounds like you're ready to live a sober life.

Dee74

Welcome back

Like Anna said there's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players, including but not limited to AA:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

JanieJ

Hi, Goodghost, nice to meet you. I'ma newbie, 13 days sober now. I too was sick of being drunk and wasting all that time, breaking and losing things and blacking out.

You've been here before so you will know there are many experienced people and resources to help you.

Got to say the AA "god" thing makes me nervous, but I am going to go along on Monday night, was going to go this week by my car broke down. (there's only one a week round here). I'm trying to keep an open mind for now.

Glad you have come back.

Hevyn

It's good to have you back GoodGhost. It sounds like you're ready to leave that old life behind. There's nothing in it for us anymore. You can do this!