Charlie117926

So here's the deal. A group of friends, all from childhood (we are in our 40's now) get together for chicken wings and drinks (beer) once a month on a Wednesday. Today is that day. We have been doing this for years.

For those of you not from the USA. " Hot wings and beer" is a national staple at least here in the Midwest.

This is a time when we can all get together, enjoy the hottest wings possible, talk about our families, sports, work etc and (in the recent past for me) drink.

The deal is I am only on day 6 of sobriety. I knew this day was coming and has been on my mind since getting sober. I really enjoy this time out with them even though they are all hard beer drinkers. I was too.

I am feeling really strong that I can do this today with just soft drinks. I already know that the question will be asked about why I am not drinking beer. I have a plan in place to answer that question.

I think I already know the responses to what I may or may not be asking directly. But I feel better for posting this. I know it seems like a trivial issue, but This is a bond I have had with these guys for over a decade.

Advice?

Hobbers

Tell them you're not feeling well today, and want to take it easy? That'll last ya a whole month, til you get some 'sobriety' under your belt, and have better answers. It worked for me the first time I got sober (4 months).

I'm worried about football season, and friends. That's every week, lol.

PaperDolls

Not a trivial issue at all.

If you feel strong and feel you have a plan to answer questions, then go. If you suddenly don't feel strong, then don't go, even if it's the last minute.

Any true friend will support you (the best they know how) through this.

P.S. I live in the midwest and you don't have to drink beer with wings. I've done it tons of times.

PurpleKnight

Day 6 is early days, there's no shame in giving it a miss!!

If you're going to go, make sure you have pre planned your answers, and have an escape plan if things get too much!!

Meraviglioso

Charlie, I am so happy for your 6 days and know you are strong enough to handle this. But please, stay alert and careful. Remember I had 13 days and fell at a party that I planned on "just stopping by to say hello". I don't want to worry you, but I want to warn you that you might get caught off guard. Don't let it happen. Go in strong and bail if you need to. I sure wish I had. YOu can do this. Stay close to us and keep your sobriety as your #1 goal tonight. Thinking of you and I really look forward to seeing you here tomorrow.

doggonecarl

Here is the advice you gave back in January when someone asked about avoiding alcohol related activities:

i wish you the best today. stay i was in your same situation last week and i was only 3 days in to sobriety. i didnt make it. i could not avoid this situation as it was a wedding. if i could have i would have. i am back on track now but i lost those days i worked hard for.

some of my co-workers wanted to meet sunday for football and i passed. i am glad i did. i wish you the best today. stay strong.

Seems like sound advice.

Charlie117926

Damn Carl, are you my past haunting me? I remember that incident well and in all seriousness, thank you for reminding me. How soon we forget.

Even though I feel strong today, I think I am going to bail on the event tonight. There is always next month. You know come to think of it, I think "my wife has to work late so I will have to pick the kids up today" if you know what I mean

Meraviglioso

Charlie, I hate to say it because I am the same and love a good get together, but you are so right, there is always next month. It might be best to skip this one. Get the kids, go to bed early, wake up sober. You have plenty more wings nights to hang out, you aren't missing too much.

Oh and what are you saying about wings being midwest?!?!? I'm an east coast girl and I clearly remember $.10 wing night at the local hang out! Every Tuesday night!

Charlie117926

Even though I feel strong, I think its too early. The posts people provided just shored up what I already knew in my heart. And of course Carl... for calling me out!

I remember the .10 wing nights. They are .50 now. Damn inflation!

Oh well, possible issue has been diverted. I cant get burned if I am not messing with fire

Meraviglioso

$.50?!??!?!?!? You are better skipping it then! I've been out of the US for over 8 years now, I guess the days of $.10 are long gone.... :/

trachemys

You young pups. Back in the dark ages they used to give them away around here if you were drinking. There was free taco night, free hot dog night, etc. The bar chain Fat Tuesday used to have crawfish nights when the lil mudbugs were in season. $10 - all you can eat AND drink.

No wonder I developed a problem.

Charlie117926

That's hilarious trachemys.

Nothing used to be free for me. but I sure do miss the .10 wing nights.

Where I live 5 Lbs. of crawfish is $20.00! But I'll pay it because I love crawfish / boils

Meraviglioso

Oh man, I sure do remember taco nights- those were also $.10 a pop!

trachemys

Ever been to Louisiana? There's roadside crawfish stands like boiled peanut stands everywhere else. Last I was there it was $1 a pound...cooked. You just pulled up a milk crate and ate sitting there.

Heaven.

LBrain

been a long time since I can remember 10 cent wings. a loooooong time.

I would consider taking a pass on wing nite this time around.

firstymer

As part of a work outing, I attended a semi-pro baseball game when I was 6 days sober. I was feeling strong and confident and decided to attend, even though such an event would otherwise have been an excuse for me to get bombed. One wise soul here at SR told me to "have a plan" if I went to the game. I had no idea what he meant. Until I got to the game. And found myself surrounded by giant mugs of beer. I survived the event with my sobriety intact. But just barely. My "plan", which I formulated on the spot, was to leave the game early, claiming some other commitment. I put the plan in place when I found myself getting ready to take that first drink.

If you decide to attend this event, I suggest you have a similar plan in place.

Good luck.

Dee74

I think you made a wise choice Charlie

D

HeartsAfire

Good call my friend.