New to Posting - Sober for 1 week
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 3
New to Posting - Sober for 1 week
After lurking for a week, I would like to take the opportunity to introduce myself and thank you all for the wonderful work you do on this site. I will apologize in advance for the length of the post. Once I started writing, it just came.
I am a Mom of 2 high school kids and have been married 25 years. I am a professional in the high-tech industry. I have a good home, a good job but I was choosing to let it be damaged by alcohol. The thing is that only a very few people knew how bad it actually was.
I have never drank in the morning but my habit had gotten to 2+ bottles of Chardonnay a night. I would come home from work, start right in on drinking, down a bottle before dinner. I would then pick up where I left off while doing dishes. I often have to work at night to catch up and would work and drink until close to midnight when I would basically pass out and then get up at 5am and start all over again.
I suffer from Ulcerative Colitis. I also have had the Shingles and went deaf in my left ear because of nerve damage. Not sure if alcohol had anything to do with either but I never let my body recover properly as I continued to drink. I have regularly forgotten what happened while I was drinking, have fallen in my house and busted up my lips and got a black eye. I have had to "work from home" (lucky I have that option) because I was too sick in the morning to go into work.
On Tuesday, 15-Jul, I woke up yet again still feeling like I was drunk and had to work from home. Something snapped in me that day. I started searching on-line looking for help. I found this website. Tuesday was Day 1. I haven't had a drink since.
The main side effect I noticed at first was not being able to sleep. I had forgotten how much my husband snores! Despite going to bed at a decent time, I probably got less than 4 hours sleep for the first few nights. By Saturday night, I was so tired that I guess my body decided enough is enough and I was able to sleep 9 hours. Last two nights have been close to 7 hours.
I was very concerned going into the weekend. What happened completely surprised me. I got up on Saturday morning at 6am. Washed the truck, cleaned the house, started the laundry and went grocery shopping. As I was unpacking the groceries, I noticed it wasn't even noon yet! I started making a list of what I wanted to get done on Sunday and every time that evening I started thinking I wanted a glass of wine, I reminded myself how good it felt to get things done on the weekend and what I wanted to do tomorrow. I bet I haven't had a sober weekend for 15 years!
I realize that I am probably on sort of a honeymoon with being sober and that there are certainly challenges ahead. Something snapped that Tuesday to make me go from "I really love wine and can't imagine not having it" to "why am I doing this to myself".
Reading through all the posts here really helped my see that there are others in the same place as I am. Thanks for listening and I am glad to have found a place where I can get the support that I need.
I am a Mom of 2 high school kids and have been married 25 years. I am a professional in the high-tech industry. I have a good home, a good job but I was choosing to let it be damaged by alcohol. The thing is that only a very few people knew how bad it actually was.
I have never drank in the morning but my habit had gotten to 2+ bottles of Chardonnay a night. I would come home from work, start right in on drinking, down a bottle before dinner. I would then pick up where I left off while doing dishes. I often have to work at night to catch up and would work and drink until close to midnight when I would basically pass out and then get up at 5am and start all over again.
I suffer from Ulcerative Colitis. I also have had the Shingles and went deaf in my left ear because of nerve damage. Not sure if alcohol had anything to do with either but I never let my body recover properly as I continued to drink. I have regularly forgotten what happened while I was drinking, have fallen in my house and busted up my lips and got a black eye. I have had to "work from home" (lucky I have that option) because I was too sick in the morning to go into work.
On Tuesday, 15-Jul, I woke up yet again still feeling like I was drunk and had to work from home. Something snapped in me that day. I started searching on-line looking for help. I found this website. Tuesday was Day 1. I haven't had a drink since.
The main side effect I noticed at first was not being able to sleep. I had forgotten how much my husband snores! Despite going to bed at a decent time, I probably got less than 4 hours sleep for the first few nights. By Saturday night, I was so tired that I guess my body decided enough is enough and I was able to sleep 9 hours. Last two nights have been close to 7 hours.
I was very concerned going into the weekend. What happened completely surprised me. I got up on Saturday morning at 6am. Washed the truck, cleaned the house, started the laundry and went grocery shopping. As I was unpacking the groceries, I noticed it wasn't even noon yet! I started making a list of what I wanted to get done on Sunday and every time that evening I started thinking I wanted a glass of wine, I reminded myself how good it felt to get things done on the weekend and what I wanted to do tomorrow. I bet I haven't had a sober weekend for 15 years!
I realize that I am probably on sort of a honeymoon with being sober and that there are certainly challenges ahead. Something snapped that Tuesday to make me go from "I really love wine and can't imagine not having it" to "why am I doing this to myself".
Reading through all the posts here really helped my see that there are others in the same place as I am. Thanks for listening and I am glad to have found a place where I can get the support that I need.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Congratulations! That sounds like a pivotal life moment you had when you thought, "Why am I doing this to myself?"
Welcome to the site, thanks for sharing your story and I hope you continue to post here.
Sleep was all over the place for me for about a month. I'd often wake at 3AM and come here to read. A cup of hot chocolate or toast and milk seemed to help. Then a couple days later I'd sleep for twelve hours.
You've made it past the worst of the physical withdrawal, keep it going!
Welcome to the site, thanks for sharing your story and I hope you continue to post here.
Sleep was all over the place for me for about a month. I'd often wake at 3AM and come here to read. A cup of hot chocolate or toast and milk seemed to help. Then a couple days later I'd sleep for twelve hours.
You've made it past the worst of the physical withdrawal, keep it going!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 174
A fellow Giants fan!!
Welcome to the forum. As a newbie myself, I find there is so much to learn and embrace on these boards.
While we are obviously very different people, (you know, I'm a gay guy, you're a mom with kids) I found a lot I could relate to in your post. I hope you stay on here!
Welcome to the forum. As a newbie myself, I find there is so much to learn and embrace on these boards.
While we are obviously very different people, (you know, I'm a gay guy, you're a mom with kids) I found a lot I could relate to in your post. I hope you stay on here!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
I got shingles during the latter stages of my drinking. I googled the symptoms and went to my doctor and he didn't believe me when I told him I had shingles until I showed him the blisters. I was 35 at the time which is apparently quite young to get it. I knew it was related to alcoholism. The immune system doesn't work at 100% on the sauce I'm sure. The best thing about getting shingles is it forced me to stop drinking for a month and take inventory of my life.
My alcoholism developed right at the time my career should have been taking off and I am now starting all over again at 37. I hid everything as best I could until there was nothing left to save. You still have a career to save and a family to support you. Reach out to someone for help while you can!
My alcoholism developed right at the time my career should have been taking off and I am now starting all over again at 37. I hid everything as best I could until there was nothing left to save. You still have a career to save and a family to support you. Reach out to someone for help while you can!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Welcome to SR GiantsFan - it's great to meet you.
When I came here I felt so alone. I had no one in my life who related to my struggle with alcohol. Here, I can be myself and everyone understands. I found the courage to quit after drinking all my life. Instead of stopping like you intend to - I kept going until I was drinking 24/7, completely dependent on it to get through the day. What a horrible way to live. I'm glad you're taking a serious look at what it's doing to your life - and taking action.
When I came here I felt so alone. I had no one in my life who related to my struggle with alcohol. Here, I can be myself and everyone understands. I found the courage to quit after drinking all my life. Instead of stopping like you intend to - I kept going until I was drinking 24/7, completely dependent on it to get through the day. What a horrible way to live. I'm glad you're taking a serious look at what it's doing to your life - and taking action.
Congrats on the first of many sober weeks. 
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
Welcome to SR. I am glad you are here.
I could relate to your post quite a bit!
The “snap” part for me was more like something finally connected that had been broken or maybe never was together in the first place.
I surrendered when I got that snap!
It was like I could suddenly see for the first time that I was an alcoholic. What my life had been and where it was going. Like the curtain moving in the Wizard of Oz. The truth was right there in front of me. I could not deny it.
I also drank straight after work and there were times I also worked from home because I was so hung over. I never drank before or at work but the weekend mornings I did. After two cups of coffee I went straight to booze and drank all day long until I went to bed (passed out).
I can also relate to the first weekend sober and how much time it seemed I had. I got done in a couple hours what used to take me all weekend to do and most of the time I never got it done. I would lose interest and just drink.
I never imagined my life without drinking but then I got to the point that I was not living, I was barely surviving.
Now I can’t imagine how I maintained that unmanageable lifestyle. The energy and the work it took to keep it going for all those years. I drank for 26 years and I have no idea how I did it. It was exhausting.
You don’t have to ever drinking again. Stick close to SR, learn about the different recovery programs and get support. That is what it is all about.
I could relate to your post quite a bit!
The “snap” part for me was more like something finally connected that had been broken or maybe never was together in the first place.
I surrendered when I got that snap!
It was like I could suddenly see for the first time that I was an alcoholic. What my life had been and where it was going. Like the curtain moving in the Wizard of Oz. The truth was right there in front of me. I could not deny it.
I also drank straight after work and there were times I also worked from home because I was so hung over. I never drank before or at work but the weekend mornings I did. After two cups of coffee I went straight to booze and drank all day long until I went to bed (passed out).
I can also relate to the first weekend sober and how much time it seemed I had. I got done in a couple hours what used to take me all weekend to do and most of the time I never got it done. I would lose interest and just drink.
I never imagined my life without drinking but then I got to the point that I was not living, I was barely surviving.
Now I can’t imagine how I maintained that unmanageable lifestyle. The energy and the work it took to keep it going for all those years. I drank for 26 years and I have no idea how I did it. It was exhausting.
You don’t have to ever drinking again. Stick close to SR, learn about the different recovery programs and get support. That is what it is all about.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Welcome Giantsfan and best of luck. Congratulations on making the decision to start living life again. This site and the people here made, and continue to make all of the difference in the world to my struggle with this addiction.
i'm only on day 16; again; but feel better each day. Not to say this is easy by any means, but i would rather get 4 - 5 hours sleep at night versus drinking all day / night and waking up in a fog, lazy, and hungover.
Great job on staying sober!
i'm only on day 16; again; but feel better each day. Not to say this is easy by any means, but i would rather get 4 - 5 hours sleep at night versus drinking all day / night and waking up in a fog, lazy, and hungover.
Great job on staying sober!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 3
Thanks for all the good wishes. Another thing that has helped me so far is a picture of me over 4th of July. I looked awful but at the time thought I felt great because of the alcohol! Every time I feel like a drink I take that picture out.
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