hey!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: illinois
Posts: 907
hey!
hello. im a semi frequent poster on the alcohol pages. daily lurker.
the short story is i went to rehab for poly-pharm and alcohol in February. hangin tough and pretty well adjusted, considering. my spouse, several rehab friends, and even my rehab counselor told me that maybe the cigarettes could wait awhile, when i entertained the thought of quitting aloud in group.
i believe that may have been the right decision.
of course, my use went up. almost to a pack a day now. dont have the money to be burning. lungs sore in the morning. a TOTAL slave.
im proud of recent accomplishments. but it would feel so much more complete if i could give up this one last chemical. when i withdraw, my main symptom is anger. and i mean ANGER! i almost feel like i could go to rehab again, just for this.
anyways, im ready to join the club. i dont know if this forum gets much traffic, but im gonna be lurking now. hope to post when i grow a pair, and make the commitment. i just want it to be for real this time!
the short story is i went to rehab for poly-pharm and alcohol in February. hangin tough and pretty well adjusted, considering. my spouse, several rehab friends, and even my rehab counselor told me that maybe the cigarettes could wait awhile, when i entertained the thought of quitting aloud in group.
i believe that may have been the right decision.
of course, my use went up. almost to a pack a day now. dont have the money to be burning. lungs sore in the morning. a TOTAL slave.
im proud of recent accomplishments. but it would feel so much more complete if i could give up this one last chemical. when i withdraw, my main symptom is anger. and i mean ANGER! i almost feel like i could go to rehab again, just for this.
anyways, im ready to join the club. i dont know if this forum gets much traffic, but im gonna be lurking now. hope to post when i grow a pair, and make the commitment. i just want it to be for real this time!
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Everyone told me the same leviathan, to wait, but honestly I wish I had just quit everything at once.
Anyway, good for you for quitting. It's not easy, but it is so worth it on so many levels. I am as proud and empowered of the quit of cigarettes as I am the booze. It feels great not to be a slave any more. I look better, I feel better, I smell better, I am all around better for it. I have not one single regret.
Hmmmmm, the anger. Well, I approached my quit in the vein of AVRT, so the anger would just be viewed as AV...a thought designed to justify crankin' a butt. Since I decided to classify those feelings as coming from the beast, it was easier for me to separate from them, to see them as trying to trick me into smoking, and redirect myself onto something else. My beast is angry...f*cking pissed off! but I'm not. That's what worked for me.
Do you do any sports or physical activity?
Anyway, good for you for quitting. It's not easy, but it is so worth it on so many levels. I am as proud and empowered of the quit of cigarettes as I am the booze. It feels great not to be a slave any more. I look better, I feel better, I smell better, I am all around better for it. I have not one single regret.
Hmmmmm, the anger. Well, I approached my quit in the vein of AVRT, so the anger would just be viewed as AV...a thought designed to justify crankin' a butt. Since I decided to classify those feelings as coming from the beast, it was easier for me to separate from them, to see them as trying to trick me into smoking, and redirect myself onto something else. My beast is angry...f*cking pissed off! but I'm not. That's what worked for me.
Do you do any sports or physical activity?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: illinois
Posts: 907
soberlicious, thanx for reply. some exercise, yes. nothing structured right now. i have a pretty fair understanding of AVRT. have been reading. i am drawn to it, and use RR as my sobriety base.
spouse wants to quit too. im afraid we will kill each other, so thinking about trying to go first.
i have nic.gum in the house, but it is like a substitute on some level. at least the way ive been using it. right now in my head, the big debate is cold turkey vs. some sort of wean down. i really am having a harder time with this than the alc. maybe because its my last active chemical vice? maybe because i can function as a person with this addiction? -or just the pure strength of nicotine. this stuff brings on the most blatant rationalizations when i cut back.
ARRRG.
spouse wants to quit too. im afraid we will kill each other, so thinking about trying to go first.
i have nic.gum in the house, but it is like a substitute on some level. at least the way ive been using it. right now in my head, the big debate is cold turkey vs. some sort of wean down. i really am having a harder time with this than the alc. maybe because its my last active chemical vice? maybe because i can function as a person with this addiction? -or just the pure strength of nicotine. this stuff brings on the most blatant rationalizations when i cut back.
ARRRG.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Well, of course, I would recommend cold turkey. I'm not big on prolonged agony. I am a big jump off person. Jump and don't look back.
I'm not gonna lie here. The first two weeks of physical withdrawal were hardcore. Like Lamaze-breathing-moments hard. But I knew that after breaking through the tough part, then I just had to consistently separate from and dismiss the cravings. It got easier very quickly.
I started running. At first it felt like my lungs would literally explode, but as I got more endurance, I would visualize my lungs, my heart, everything getting cleaner and stronger and better. It wasn't long before I was laughing at the AVs suggestion of a smoke.
It's been two years for me and only on a couple of rare occasions have I had cravings so intense I could watch myself in my minds eye taking a deep drag, I could "feel" my lungs filling with smoke and a huge smile spreading across my face. In the same split second though, I smile for real because I know what's happening. I've even been known to say out loud "I see what you're doing. The answer is still no." And then I just chuckle. The Beast is crafty, but she's no match for me.
As quick as it came, it was gone.
You can do this. Expect that your partners Beast will seek out your Beast and vice versa. Makes it tough, but not impossible. I cannot tell you how badass you will feel when this is done.
I'm not gonna lie here. The first two weeks of physical withdrawal were hardcore. Like Lamaze-breathing-moments hard. But I knew that after breaking through the tough part, then I just had to consistently separate from and dismiss the cravings. It got easier very quickly.
I started running. At first it felt like my lungs would literally explode, but as I got more endurance, I would visualize my lungs, my heart, everything getting cleaner and stronger and better. It wasn't long before I was laughing at the AVs suggestion of a smoke.
It's been two years for me and only on a couple of rare occasions have I had cravings so intense I could watch myself in my minds eye taking a deep drag, I could "feel" my lungs filling with smoke and a huge smile spreading across my face. In the same split second though, I smile for real because I know what's happening. I've even been known to say out loud "I see what you're doing. The answer is still no." And then I just chuckle. The Beast is crafty, but she's no match for me.
As quick as it came, it was gone.
You can do this. Expect that your partners Beast will seek out your Beast and vice versa. Makes it tough, but not impossible. I cannot tell you how badass you will feel when this is done.
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