tbhinshaw

My boyfriend / fiance is currently in a rehab program and has been away from home for 6 months. hes only allowed one phone call a week for 10 minutes and the therapist never answers my calls. She doesnt give him the packages and letters i send him. And currently threatened to not allow him to call me anymore. I havent heard from him in over a week and i dont know whats happening with him. This whole thing is so frustrating I just want to breakdown and cry. I havent slept in weeks because im sick to my stomach about this and im worried about him. And it doesnt help matters much when his dad is always calling me and attacking me putting all this blame on me ! I know its a good thing hes getting help but at the same time i just want all of this to be over already ! and i just want him back home with me

Ann

I just replied on another thread to someone else in your shoes. Here are my thoughts...

The reason the rules are so tight right now is because those with professional experience dealing with addiction know that he needs to focus on himself and his own recovery without outside distractions...because until he does he will not get well.

This is not a rejection of you, it's a life saving measure to work on his own recovery and learn how to live life without drugs. Just like his addiction wasn't about you, neither is his recovery. He needs to do this for himself.

In the meantime maybe you could find meetings for you and try to find your balance without him. When you are each healthier, you will be able to make healthier decisions. Spending your time obsessing with him is unhealthy for both of you.

Hugs

tbhinshaw

But i never get updates on anything with him. I am listed as his contact and when i get a hold of the therapist shell tell me shell call with updates but never does so i have no idea how hes even doing with the program. And i have not once been called for therapy sessions like the admissions told me i would be. The rehab itself is lacking in communication with me. All i get are calls about money.

Ann

Are you paying for the rehab? If so, perhaps ask them about family sessions and if they hold them. Not all rehabs do.

If you aren't paying for it, then maybe just take a step back and trust the process. Soon enough you will find out how he is doing.

Hugs

tbhinshaw

I am paying anything that isnt covered by his insurance. I am also listed as the consent contact. I was told there are family sessions but i have yet to get any calls with them. And when i get calls i am working and can not answer even though i have told them time and time gaain my availability. This is all very frustrating because i am in the dark with how he is doing. For all i know he could have left the place